*After This Week, All The Shows Will Be Shut Down Until November 1st*
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| WWE.com's Edge's stupidity list | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Oct 12 2010, 02:07:46 PM (191 Views) | |
| Killswitch200 | Oct 12 2010, 02:07:46 PM Post #1 |
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WWC/EWC Interviewer
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The “Jersey Shore” Cast OK, here’s “The Situation.” If The Rated-R Superstar wants to rid the world of stupidity, there is no place better to go than the Jersey Shore. Already frustrated with the Garden State over the New Jersey Devils, The Ultimate Opportunist should have no trouble showing the carping cast of this notorious reality show that the vacation is over. After silencing the fist-pumping freeloaders with a swift series of con-chair-tos, Edge could introduce Snooki to the full efforts of the Spear! “Dashing” Cody Rhodes’ Hygiene Tips It is our sincere desire that the nine-time World Champion give “Dashing” Cody Rhodes a “Rated-R Superstar Makeover” in five easy steps: 1) Lightly apply a chair to the back of the head; 2) Sprinkle a series of hard punches to the body; 3) Blot the face, ever so gently, by DDTing it into the canvas; 4) Fluff out the hair with an earth-shattering Spear; 5) Add bandages. Rinse and repeat. Mel Gibson Edge’s only real problem here would be determining where to start. Really, is there anything Gibson hasn’t done or said in the past few years that wasn’t stupid? The anti-Semitic comments, the phone calls to his ex. (Hello? Rants on an answering machine? TMZ must adore you.) Sorry, Mad Max – you are seriously beyond Thunderdome. We hope and pray that The Master Manipulator will act as the lethal weapon for your lunacy. LayCool “Rewind!” “Real talk!” Real stupid? The Unified Divas Championship is firmly in the grasp of Michelle McCool & Layla, the “flawless” duo that turns titles into giant B.F.F. charms, shares their championship reigns like clothes and even mic themselves during matches so the WWE Universe can hear them talk. Is an explanation really needed here? British Petroleum The outspoken host of “The Cutting Edge” has no trouble telling others when to plug it. So why not take a stab at the biggest disaster since Typhoon & Earthquake teamed up? BP’s entire handling of its oil spill has been textbook ridiculousness, so much so that even Kevin Costner and the Avatar guy backed out on helping them. With that in mind, we think it’s time for The Ultimate Opportunist to sink the executive board of British Petroleum, Titanic-style. Michael Cole’s Legwarmers On WWE NXT Yeah, we know Edge has already taken issue with Cole on Monday Night Raw. Yet we feel it’s imperative that he give Cole’s recent Tuesday night dancing on WWE NXT a second look. Think of all the needless suffering that could be avoided by making sure the legwarmers, fedora and ballet slippers never see the light of day again. Seriously, it looked like Oktoberfest vomited on Cole – and it made us sick as well. Superstars Without Nicknames The Master Manipulator, The Rated-R Superstar, The Ultimate Opportunist. Call him what you will. One thing is for certain where Edge is concerned: If you want to make it in WWE, dedication, ambition and seizing the moment are nothing without a really great moniker. And calling yourself “Dolph Ziggler” doesn’t count. Don’t fight it, Edge. Let loose on the nameless masses and put them out of their foolish misery. M. Night Shyamalan We see dumb people all the time. However, after “M.’s” past several cinematic turkeys, it’s no surprise why he deserves to be pummeled by 19th-century villagers in modern-day Pennsylvania, ladies in the water and all plant life. If Edge gets his hands on him, we hope his Spear will leave the helmsman of The Last Airbender sucking serious wind. |
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