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Shin Hyakuji High School Tvtropes
The Book that is Hyakuji's Story has come to a close. However, there are still plenty of stories left to be told in the madcap Anime Universe it inhabits. As one book closes, so too does another open. Presented by veteran Hyakuji Staff Members, check out the next generation EVOLUTION of "Anything-Goes" Anime Roleplaying at Senki Academy
The Book that is Hyakuji's Story has come to a close. However, there are still plenty of stories left to be told in the madcap Anime Universe it inhabits. As one book closes, so too does another open. Presented by veteran Hyakuji Staff Members, check out the next generation EVOLUTION of "Anything-Goes" Anime Roleplaying at Senki Academy
| Miyoko Kiyomi (Profile); (2nd Character) Demon Neko | |||
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| Tweet Topic Started: Aug 24 2013, 01:28 PM (721 Views) | |||
| Hiriko | Aug 24 2013, 01:28 PM Post #1 | ||
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Invisible box...? How is dis possible..? ○u○
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Name: Miyoko [nickname Yoko] Kiyomi Gender: I'm a girl! o^o Girl I tell you! Age:15 Birthdate: 11/3/XXXX Astrological Sign:Scorpio Height: (Just under 5'0) Weight:119
Occupation: Student Grade level: First-Year Powers/Abilities: Neko (Feline) Abilities: In her Neko form she can climb / jump 25% higher. Like a cat, she can see clearly in the dark in and out of her The only way she can transform back to her natural form, is just as the same as being triggered into it. Except of being hugged by the opposite gender to be transformed into a cat, Miyoko can only be hugged by the same gender to be transitioned back into her natural form. Demon Abilities: She can manipulate the way her opponent may see things in combat, while the illusions are caused by their fears! To make her delusions / hallucinations work, it can only caused by her getting full eye contact,using her unusual red eye's as the primary source to hypnotize the opponent. The hypnotism she has on him/her,can be broken in a variety of ways... One is if the opponent is able, to break away from eye contact. Or she can be triggered out of doing it by being distracted by her opponent forming distractions, by attacking her (as she is very small and petite, she has to have her guard up at always! Or taunting her to do something else, as she has a very fiery temper it makes her distracted from what she is trying to do. In this case, that is hypnotism. Her illusions are only manipulated by the way her opponent takes in the environment around them. (By hypnotizing him, she uses his/her fears to form up in his / her perspective of the environment.) That way while Miyoko's opponent is distracted she can easily attack him/her (to make them weaker.) But, she can only use it once during combat and only, and only for a short period of time, or else her stamina will drain out completely! She can conjure small - medium sized fireballs from both of her palms at two separate times. Which is only caused by her emotional state, of rage. (So if she's happy and enjoying herself it can not be triggered by itself to happen.) Equipment She Has: White Iphone with bubble gum pink kitty shaped Iphone case, Stuffed animal that is a bunny, A hidden pocket knife (In a chest that contains her diary with a animal print hard solvent combination lock on it, Hyakuji High School Uniform, and a Maid cafe cosplay outfit, bunny cosplay outfit and many more of her favorite cosplay outfits. Residency Request: Fudo (Girls only) Dormitory Schedule: Homeroom Teacher: Hiro Advanced Demonology, Supernatural Studies, Cooking Personality Description: To start of Miyoko tends to be very childish, and very much like a child she is full of curiosity. She loves making new friends and loves to create / read gossip, she hates reading book's in general so don't expect her to be in the library that often. She loves eating sweets just as much as she likes creating them! She likes sushi, chocolate, dumpling's, cake any type of treat in the book you name it! (Even though she is part neko/feline she actually hate's tuna so don't expect her to eat it, if you give it to her.) She loves cosplay in general, so if you have a school festival going on and theirs a cos play contest or a maid cafe' running so don't be surprised if you see Miyoko dressed up in one of her many cos-play outfits! She dislikes it when people act too serious or shy it doesn't mean she necessarily hates that individual, she just thinks that wherever you go in life it's important to have fun! She someday want's to be an actor, as she can be a bit dramatic at times (okay, maybe a lot...) when it comes to situation's that she takes particular interest in, or complicated situations of her own. Personal History: Since she was born, she was always in the middle of two different races and two separate backgrounds. Her mother who was a full neko came from a family that originated a clan in the east of southern Tokyo forest. While her father was a demon prince of a kingdom in the far west of the south Tokyo forest. The day that both families found out about her mother and father's relationship, let alone that she had existed. Both separate families were enraged and disgusted at the thought of their species co-existing together in a child. So both separate families both agreed that if they didn't find Miyoko dead by the upcoming sunrise, they would go to war with each-other. Of course, Miyoko’s father and mother didn't want both their families going to war with one another but they didn't want to kill off there own child either. So that night Miyoko's father and mother escaped from each other's home's, so that they could meet up with one another, so they could go through the process of giving up their only child, together to a young family of sorcerer's, that had been wanting a child or a long time, and raise her to be the best she could be. 15 years have passed since that day, Miyoko knew that the 'parent's' she had now weren't really her biological parents, but she didn't care. She was so happy that she had people the cared and wanted the best for her, so when she asked if she could go to Hyakuji High to get a better understanding of her species and make new friends, of course they said yes! She knew that the new life that was awaiting for her at Hyakuji High School, was going to be the one that would change her life forever. Mashed Potatoes?: There is no spoon. Edited by Hiriko, Jul 7 2014, 02:20 PM.
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| Jonny | Aug 26 2013, 06:39 AM Post #2 | ||
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Most of what I'm really going to ask regarding this profile is down to the powers section, which currently falls into one of those borderline cases in terms of the power limit. See, whilst her enhanced athleticism is sort of put down as a general increase from the catgirl transformation (unless you mean she literally turns into a cat, which is enough of a physical change to perhaps count as a separate power), the eyes are treated as something she can trigger separately. So she has night vision, enhanced physique, maybe transformation, and then the hallucination and fireball powers. I know these are intended as 'package' deals, but I hope you can see why they might ultimately exceed the starting limit. I would recommend either more closely tying them together (ie, a single cat mode that carries the benefits you might expect), or removing some so as to streamline the bio - you can always add them back later with the various upgrade periods, after all. If you could also maybe expand on the details, like how she causes the illusions, if she needs outside help to transform back, etc, that would be most helpful. |
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| Hiriko | Aug 26 2013, 05:08 PM Post #3 | ||
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Invisible box...? How is dis possible..? ○u○
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Thank's Jonny! c: I did what you asked by expanding the 'detail's' on how she can be transitioned back into her natural form and the cause's on how she makes her illusions happen, as well as the fire balls.
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| Jonny | Aug 27 2013, 05:33 PM Post #4 | ||
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Okay, regarding the neko abilities, there seems to be a few issues regarding grammar that makes it... a bit confusing to try and understand, I apologise. Now it starts with 'When in her other form', goes to brackets, and then starts what I presume is another sentence. If you read over it, it gets awkward and takes a bit to try and decipher. For the actual content itself now, I think you really need to decide whether the abilities are for the cat form, or are in her regular form but she just has them. Shifting for the extra agility but not for the eyesight makes them definitely two separate things, when it doesn't really need to be. The hugging thing is mostly superfluous and can be kept if you want, but I don't see what exactly it contributes or lends to the character. Is it for comedy, drama, and just giving it something that makes it 'different' compared to other transformations? Especially the requirement for differing genders depending on form... With the demon abilities, whilst you've expanded it, its also brought up more questions. The fireballs are for the most part fine, its the hypnotism that's more tricky now. Reading it, one can't tell if its a single image thing, or if the whole environment appears to change, and it says 'it can only caused by her getting intact with their focal point'. I presume you mean her getting in contact (intact means in one piece or surviving) with their focal point, but then, what is the focal point? Or are you referring to her getting in eye contact so they see her unusual eyes? Can the illusions be broken? I can see the potential in the ideas here, but they still need further streamlining as concepts in order to be good for execution on the site. |
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| Hiriko | Aug 27 2013, 06:03 PM Post #5 | ||
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Invisible box...? How is dis possible..? ○u○
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Edited!
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| Jonny | Aug 29 2013, 05:32 PM Post #6 | ||
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Sorry for the delay, I had thought someone else would take a look after I asked for a second opinion. But regardless, back to this profile then. Aside of grammar issues that still need some resolving (check the second sentence in neko abilities to see what I mean), now that you' added in and clarified some details, I do have to say now that the hypnosis may need some toning down. The big issue I suppose is the notion that the only way to break it is for someone to break eye contact before the effect 'sinks in' (which is left pretty vague, admittedly), which presumes a bit about both the settings and characters. It might be better to say something along the lines of the illusion not fully taking effect if eye contact is broken early, which still gives a similar result. Again, will recommend maybe just putting eyes into the cat form itself rather than separate, but other than that, I think its near to approval now. |
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| Hiriko | Sep 2 2013, 11:26 PM Post #7 | ||
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Invisible box...? How is dis possible..? ○u○
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Okay! Thank's Jonny, and sorry I didn't edit / reply sooner (Was on a trip for the weekend) :3 Also finished editing c:
Edited by Hiriko, Sep 2 2013, 11:36 PM.
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| Jonny | Sep 3 2013, 09:30 PM Post #8 | ||
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...I'm going to apologise, but I'm not sure how exactly your edit had addressed the issue of the hypnosis supposedly being unbreakable outside of avoiding eye contact. My point was given the setting and the various kinds of beings about, that might be a bit much to assume. | ||
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| Jonny | Sep 5 2013, 06:58 PM Post #9 | ||
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Approved |
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