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Shin Hyakuji High School Tvtropes
The Book that is Hyakuji's Story has come to a close. However, there are still plenty of stories left to be told in the madcap Anime Universe it inhabits. As one book closes, so too does another open. Presented by veteran Hyakuji Staff Members, check out the next generation EVOLUTION of "Anything-Goes" Anime Roleplaying at Senki Academy
The Book that is Hyakuji's Story has come to a close. However, there are still plenty of stories left to be told in the madcap Anime Universe it inhabits. As one book closes, so too does another open. Presented by veteran Hyakuji Staff Members, check out the next generation EVOLUTION of "Anything-Goes" Anime Roleplaying at Senki Academy
| Veritas Stoppable's Story | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: May 21 2010, 01:04 PM (476 Views) | |
| Cyberstrike | May 21 2010, 01:04 PM Post #1 |
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Premise : Premise : The Middleton Year Ron Stoppable had taken his son to Middleton High and enrolled him the moment he became 16 and secretly had enrolled him at Yamanouchi in order that his son might gain the mystical monkey power or Ki that he himself had. One week later his parents were killed by Drakken and his Diablo Bots and so Veritas took all of his father's money and got a flight to japan. No longer would he remain in Middleton until he learned to fight better was the decision made by Veritas as he walked through Japan to a bank. Going into the bank he converted all of his father's money into Yen so that he could spend it in Japan. Deciding to follow his father's last wish and enroll at a school in Japan so that he could attend Yamanouchi during weekends and breaks from school and all his free time Veritas walked to Hyakuji High. Now it happened that there was a storm coming and it began to rain on his parade literally. He had no umbrella and rain jacket with him. It was time for him to enroll. He had after all promised that he would attend a school and what better one than one that dealt with magical beings all the time or those like them? Veritas thoughtfully had pondered over that question before coming to Hyakuji after storing all his money in the form of Yen in the bank so that he could access it later. Successfully having enrolled at Hyakuji Veritas was attacked by Monkey Fist who was in Japan? Well this ticked Veritas that he was being attacked where he was going to go to school at and so he held out his hand imagining a sword forming in it and much to his delight his powers finally obeyed his wishes. Taking down Monkey Fist and his simian gang Veritas dragged them away from the school and threw them into a police van before bumping into Salene FrostFire by accident. "Hello there. " Still a bit on edge from the fight against Monkey Fist Veritas was not one that would easily trust people, but he was being polite. No need to offend people. Salene reeled back and asked "Will you please be careful?" in a feminine tone of voice and then said "Are you alright?" The answer to the question was self evident as sporting numerous tears on his clothing due to the sharp little finger guards the monkeys wore and tears in his flesh due to those Veritas was definitely not alright. "I will be alright in a day or two. " said Veritas. He had begun a walk away from Salene back to Hyakuji in order that he might continue to study up. He needed to learn a lot of things was the realization that came to him after the horrible fight with Monkey Fist which he had won thanks to dumb luck. If his powers had not worked then he would likely be dead at the moment by the hand of that villain. Ignoring the rain for the moment Veritas ran back to his dorm as quickly as he possibly could in order to provide some semblance of proper attire when he met with the dean the next day in order to complete his enrollment. He would live at the school he had decided since it probably according to rumor had enough defenses to keep that insane Monkey Fist fellow away from him. Having no desire for a repeat Veritas closed his eyes and went to sleep and then he had a dream. Dream : Unleash the Mystical Monkey Power. You are ready for the power that is within your soul young stoppable. Like your father you too can access that power so put it to use. You managed to scratch the barest amount of said power but sadly you can't fully access the power yet but you must if you wish to defeat what Monkey Fist has done. In his dream he was standing at a Dojo and fighting bunches of ninjas while hearing a voice. Having woken up due to the dream scaring him Veritas realized that if he was to survive at Hyakuji he would himself need to adapt to the situation he was currently in. True his father had bit the dust as had his mother but Veritas was wealthier than ever and so if he had to spend some of that to survive so be it. Walking out into the sun after changing into his last spare set of clothes, a Gi that his father had worn that was white in color Veritas went to a bamboo forest nearby with a pocket knife and sat down and began to whittle. At first he whittled nothing but then made a sword out of the bamboo shaping it so it reminded him of his father's sword the lotus blade. Yet why now was he doing this? It was as if his subconscious was telling him that he could defend himself if the need should arise. Why though did he have these dreams was one of the questions Veritas asked himself as he pondered over the things he had seen and done so far in Japan. First he had gone to the bank and then he had enrolled in Hyakuji but yet he felt something was missing. His father had told him stories about a certain group. A group that was secret but that might prove to be beneficial for him to join so that he would have allies when the time came for him to fight. |
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| Katyusha | May 21 2010, 01:47 PM Post #2 |
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少し, 頭冷やそうか...
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Some finer points of critique. 1. Pacing - Your story paces terribly, feels rushed, and really doesn't read well. 2. Spelling - At least spell other people's characters' names correctly. 3. Research - Zero. Its like you didn't even bother looking up how banks work. Or well, anything else in your story. 4. Character Portrayal - Selene is portrayed about as accurate to character as much as bear traps are suitable stand-ins for air fresheners. I could go on, but this honestly can be summed up as "It reads like bad wish fulfillment fanfiction." |
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| Cyberstrike | May 21 2010, 02:03 PM Post #3 |
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Alright. Someone delete this topic. I have a lot of rewriting to do. |
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