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Gym stories
Topic Started: Feb 27 2015, 06:28 AM (837 Views)
spasgur
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Just wanted to create a thread where people can post their funniest gym stories about wackos coming to their gym and acting crazy.

I'm at a lecture right now so I can't post a story right now, but I'll post one later.
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Don King

Must be a boring lecture, and you obviously don't own the same phone as Nate.
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spasgur
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Yeah, was about environmental impact assessment on a little shit hole in the UK. Was boring as hell.
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Skeletonrock
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Have you seen a machine like this?

It's an interesting one, because it seems to try to mimic the motion you could get from doing dumbbell press. Which begs the question, why not just do dumbbell press?

But anyway:

This "older" gal was in the gym the other day. Full on gray hair. She's not in shape, but I respect the fact that she is there trying to do stuff.

She lays on that machine and puts her feet on either handle and starts using her legs to press the handles up. I think she had five pounds on either side to boot. Not trying to be mean but it was exceptionally funny. I wanted to be nice and try to explain to her how the machine works but I felt like it would humiliate her. So I just did nothing.

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dhk1980
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Skeletonrock
Mar 1 2015, 06:07 AM
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Have you seen a machine like this?

It's an interesting one, because it seems to try to mimic the motion you could get from doing dumbbell press. Which begs the question, why not just do dumbbell press?

But anyway:

This "older" gal was in the gym the other day. Full on gray hair. She's not in shape, but I respect the fact that she is there trying to do stuff.

She lays on that machine and puts her feet on either handle and starts using her legs to press the handles up. I think she had five pounds on either side to boot. Not trying to be mean but it was exceptionally funny. I wanted to be nice and try to explain to her how the machine works but I felt like it would humiliate her. So I just did nothing.

skellie, if u don't know the difference between doing machine exercises and free weight exercises by now, then you're drunk and lost. :p the machines keep everything balanced and stable. that makes a world of difference in how much more u can lift with it compared to doing a same body part workout with the same weight. btw, your story also goes to show there are so many dumbasses out there that don't know WTF they are doing and don't even bother to ask how to do it.
Edited by dhk1980, Mar 1 2015, 10:45 AM.
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Onion
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Skeletonrock
Mar 1 2015, 06:07 AM
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Have you seen a machine like this?

It's an interesting one, because it seems to try to mimic the motion you could get from doing dumbbell press. Which begs the question, why not just do dumbbell press?

But anyway:

This "older" gal was in the gym the other day. Full on gray hair. She's not in shape, but I respect the fact that she is there trying to do stuff.

She lays on that machine and puts her feet on either handle and starts using her legs to press the handles up. I think she had five pounds on either side to boot. Not trying to be mean but it was exceptionally funny. I wanted to be nice and try to explain to her how the machine works but I felt like it would humiliate her. So I just did nothing.

As someone with chronic shoulder problems, this is my absolute favourite piece of equipment for chest exercises. I actually choose gyms based on whether or not they have this equipment. The isolated arms mimic the motion freedom dumbells (which used to be my favourite), all while minimizing the risk of tweaking my shoulder for the 164th time.

I love all of Hammer Strength's isolated line of equipment.


That said, I would have loved to see her use it as a leg press.
Edited by Onion, Mar 1 2015, 12:59 PM.
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spasgur
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The gym at my university is quite small and compact. There are usually not more than 3-4 people there at a time. One day there was this kinda skinny guy who was being extremely loud. Roaring and heaving each time he lifted anything. Sounded like he was being ass raped. Then he went to the heavy bag and did some combos on it. I think he tried to look and sound cool because he was dancing around it and did the "bssshh" sound with each hit and kick. He looked like a retard, was about to knock himself out of balance a few times too because he always had just one foot on the ground whenever he punched. There were a few other people there and I could see they thought WTF too. As did I.
He hasn't been there since.

On a positive note there's a hot girl that often does yoga exercises there and I can hear that she's listening to Led Zeppelin meanwhile. Might just be my dream girl I should strike up conversation with her next time I see her.
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dhk1980
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spasgur
Mar 2 2015, 02:21 PM
The gym at my university is quite small and compact. There are usually not more than 3-4 people there at a time. One day there was this kinda skinny guy who was being extremely loud. Roaring and heaving each time he lifted anything. Sounded like he was being ass raped. Then he went to the heavy bag and did some combos on it. I think he tried to look and sound cool because he was dancing around it and did the "bssshh" sound with each hit and kick. He looked like a retard, was about to knock himself out of balance a few times too because he always had just one foot on the ground whenever he punched. There were a few other people there and I could see they thought WTF too. As did I.
He hasn't been there since.

On a positive note there's a hot girl that often does yoga exercises there and I can hear that she's listening to Led Zeppelin meanwhile. Might just be my dream girl I should strike up conversation with her next time I see her.
and with what money are u going to take her out spazzie? :p
Edited by dhk1980, Mar 2 2015, 03:22 PM.
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spasgur
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dhk1980
Mar 2 2015, 03:22 PM
spasgur
Mar 2 2015, 02:21 PM
The gym at my university is quite small and compact. There are usually not more than 3-4 people there at a time. One day there was this kinda skinny guy who was being extremely loud. Roaring and heaving each time he lifted anything. Sounded like he was being ass raped. Then he went to the heavy bag and did some combos on it. I think he tried to look and sound cool because he was dancing around it and did the "bssshh" sound with each hit and kick. He looked like a retard, was about to knock himself out of balance a few times too because he always had just one foot on the ground whenever he punched. There were a few other people there and I could see they thought WTF too. As did I.
He hasn't been there since.

On a positive note there's a hot girl that often does yoga exercises there and I can hear that she's listening to Led Zeppelin meanwhile. Might just be my dream girl I should strike up conversation with her next time I see her.
and with what money are u going to take her out spazzie? :p
Haven't I told you guys about how students here are paid by the state to take an education? :lol: That on top of my student job and loan lands me about $1500 a month, most of which is spent on beers.
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dhk1980
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spasgur
Mar 2 2015, 03:51 PM
dhk1980
Mar 2 2015, 03:22 PM
spasgur
Mar 2 2015, 02:21 PM
The gym at my university is quite small and compact. There are usually not more than 3-4 people there at a time. One day there was this kinda skinny guy who was being extremely loud. Roaring and heaving each time he lifted anything. Sounded like he was being ass raped. Then he went to the heavy bag and did some combos on it. I think he tried to look and sound cool because he was dancing around it and did the "bssshh" sound with each hit and kick. He looked like a retard, was about to knock himself out of balance a few times too because he always had just one foot on the ground whenever he punched. There were a few other people there and I could see they thought WTF too. As did I.
He hasn't been there since.

On a positive note there's a hot girl that often does yoga exercises there and I can hear that she's listening to Led Zeppelin meanwhile. Might just be my dream girl I should strike up conversation with her next time I see her.
and with what money are u going to take her out spazzie? :p
Haven't I told you guys about how students here are paid by the state to take an education? :lol: That on top of my student job and loan lands me about $1500 a month, most of which is spent on beers.
u need to get busy punching those heavy bags with all those beer consumption. :p
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spasgur
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dhk1980
Mar 2 2015, 05:48 PM
spasgur
Mar 2 2015, 03:51 PM
dhk1980
Mar 2 2015, 03:22 PM
spasgur
Mar 2 2015, 02:21 PM
The gym at my university is quite small and compact. There are usually not more than 3-4 people there at a time. One day there was this kinda skinny guy who was being extremely loud. Roaring and heaving each time he lifted anything. Sounded like he was being ass raped. Then he went to the heavy bag and did some combos on it. I think he tried to look and sound cool because he was dancing around it and did the "bssshh" sound with each hit and kick. He looked like a retard, was about to knock himself out of balance a few times too because he always had just one foot on the ground whenever he punched. There were a few other people there and I could see they thought WTF too. As did I.
He hasn't been there since.

On a positive note there's a hot girl that often does yoga exercises there and I can hear that she's listening to Led Zeppelin meanwhile. Might just be my dream girl I should strike up conversation with her next time I see her.
and with what money are u going to take her out spazzie? :p
Haven't I told you guys about how students here are paid by the state to take an education? :lol: That on top of my student job and loan lands me about $1500 a month, most of which is spent on beers.
u need to get busy punching those heavy bags with all those beer consumption. :p
I go at it for about 3x45 minutes a week but I think my liver is taking that damage tenfold each week.
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19nate79

Skeletonrock
Mar 1 2015, 06:07 AM
Posted Image

Have you seen a machine like this?

It's an interesting one, because it seems to try to mimic the motion you could get from doing dumbbell press. Which begs the question, why not just do dumbbell press?

But anyway:

This "older" gal was in the gym the other day. Full on gray hair. She's not in shape, but I respect the fact that she is there trying to do stuff.

She lays on that machine and puts her feet on either handle and starts using her legs to press the handles up. I think she had five pounds on either side to boot. Not trying to be mean but it was exceptionally funny. I wanted to be nice and try to explain to her how the machine works but I felt like it would humiliate her. So I just did nothing.

nobody ever takes unsolicited advice well
i don;t care if they take the dumbell shove it up their ass and then lick it off
they won;t be like "wow so that's how you bench press" when you're done
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19nate79

Onion
Mar 1 2015, 12:57 PM
Skeletonrock
Mar 1 2015, 06:07 AM
Posted Image

Have you seen a machine like this?

It's an interesting one, because it seems to try to mimic the motion you could get from doing dumbbell press. Which begs the question, why not just do dumbbell press?

But anyway:

This "older" gal was in the gym the other day. Full on gray hair. She's not in shape, but I respect the fact that she is there trying to do stuff.

She lays on that machine and puts her feet on either handle and starts using her legs to press the handles up. I think she had five pounds on either side to boot. Not trying to be mean but it was exceptionally funny. I wanted to be nice and try to explain to her how the machine works but I felt like it would humiliate her. So I just did nothing.

As someone with chronic shoulder problems, this is my absolute favourite piece of equipment for chest exercises. I actually choose gyms based on whether or not they have this equipment. The isolated arms mimic the motion freedom dumbells (which used to be my favourite), all while minimizing the risk of tweaking my shoulder for the 164th time.

I love all of Hammer Strength's isolated line of equipment.


That said, I would have loved to see her use it as a leg press.
proper barbell bench should alleviate most of your shoulder issues
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dwarfofdoom

not really a gym story. My BJJ club is hosting a wrestling seminar. The club gets a post on our facebook from someone saying that a right wing white supremacist is advertising the seminar on their FB page saying it would a great opportunity to improve their grappling. The racists were too dumb/lazy to do even the most basic research about te seminar or our club. The seminar will be lead by an African wrestling coach with mainly black assistant coaches and our bjj club is run Afro-carribean and asian instructors. Just really f'n weird.

We had to put a polite post on the idiots page saying that while we aren't telling them not to come our club we wouldn't tolerate them promoting their bullshit views so they'ed better steer clear. Will be very interesting if any of them turn up.

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split decision
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dwarfofdoom
Apr 5 2015, 03:39 PM
not really a gym story. My BJJ club is hosting a wrestling seminar. The club gets a post on our facebook from someone saying that a right wing white supremacist is advertising the seminar on their FB page saying it would a great opportunity to improve their grappling. The racists were too dumb/lazy to do even the most basic research about te seminar or our club. The seminar will be lead by an African wrestling coach with mainly black assistant coaches and our bjj club is run Afro-carribean and asian instructors. Just really f'n weird.

We had to put a polite post on the idiots page saying that while we aren't telling them not to come our club we wouldn't tolerate them promoting their bullshit views so they'ed better steer clear. Will be very interesting if any of them turn up.


They see us rollin'...



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:lol:
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