| My first fuhk | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Nov 19 2014, 02:29 AM (566 Views) | |
| Skinny | Nov 19 2014, 02:29 AM Post #1 |
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Unreal... Dudes at work are talking shit about skanky hos and I hear a name I haven't heard VERY MUCH since grade 9 - ______ _______. I immediately reply, "Did you say ______ _______?" Yep, that's the one - my first fuhk. Unreal, she has a reputation that probably runs far and wide because my first ride on the pussy express later became a well known local stripper and general slut. I've heard her name mentioned in the past on a few occasions. As an adult it kinda makes me sad for her. She must have had one seriously fuhked-up life to turn into a stripper and well known skankster. Thirty years ago I walked to her house with my posse of friends. We show up and she invites us in while her parents and another couple are getting hammered downstairs. Later they come up stairs and her dad staggers over, removes my ball cap, points at the floor and tells me, "You better not cross this line or else." Shortly after that all but one of my friends leave the house. My hardcore stoner friend Gilbert is so fuhkin' lazy that he's happy to lay on the couch and watch TV while I make moves on ______. Eventually the parents leave! Seriously. WTF kind of parents leave their teenage daughter home alone with a couple of teenage boys they never met? What a fuhked up situation. What did I do? I went for it. OMG - she had an awesome body for 13. Big tits and a nice ass. Her face was 50/50. I gradually pulled her clothes off as we went downstairs to her room. Seems surreal when I think of it now. Anyhow, I heard she's managing a local bar. There's a small part of me that really wants to see what she looks like. I dunno...is that fuhked up or what? Edited by Skinny, Nov 19 2014, 02:30 AM.
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| niniendowarrior | Nov 19 2014, 02:38 AM Post #2 |
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Shadow Member
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F'ed up. |
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| split decision | Nov 19 2014, 02:55 AM Post #3 |
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Porn savant
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Only f'ed up if you take the wife and kids. |
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| Ash | Nov 19 2014, 05:19 AM Post #4 |
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5 Shovels
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Stories about anyone's first time is often funny. Any volunteers? |
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| 19nate79 | Nov 19 2014, 08:54 AM Post #5 |
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| Tallica | Nov 19 2014, 09:26 AM Post #6 |
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We were both 16, and lost our V cards together. I just remember banging on her mom's bed on a Tigger blanket. It was pretty terrible. Afterward, she made the comment "Well, at least now we know that's overrated" which made me feel like a complete failure ![]() Luckily we didn't stop working at it and it got a lot better
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| split decision | Nov 19 2014, 11:10 AM Post #7 |
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Porn savant
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This gif just about sums it up...![]() Nah, it wasn't that bad. Also 16. Brought her home to her mom's place late. Her mom and step-father were upstairs in bed. We spent quite a while in the foyer feeling each other up. She turned, faced the wall, stuck her ass out and put her hands on the wall. Up went her skirt, down came her underwear and I went in (after I got a condom on)! Must have lasted at least 30 seconds. We repeated that scene several times over the next few months. Never got caught by her folks, but the thought passed through my mind. I hate to have been running out the door with my pants around my ankles. |
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| 19nate79 | Nov 19 2014, 11:22 AM Post #8 |
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I managed 7 strokes before I got that familiar tingle. She told me to stop right before I Crossed the point of no return. 17th birthday. Later she became nuts and I had to break up with her. We lasted 6 months. She wouldn't do doggy style because it was too impersonal. Bleh. Next GF was a redhead who was down for whatever. Met with her again a little while ago. Great sex. Not much else. Ran it's short course but such is life |
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| Deleted User | Nov 19 2014, 11:31 AM Post #9 |
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Deleted User
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Was this before or after you pararescued her father out of the Arctic Ocean in a chopper you were flying because the pilot died? |
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| 19nate79 | Nov 19 2014, 12:22 PM Post #10 |
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| krazo101 | Nov 19 2014, 12:33 PM Post #11 |
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I was 16, she was 17. Her mom would go to night school on the weekdays and I would come over while she was home alone. Told my parents I was at "the gym." It was super awkward. The first few times we tried to do it I could even find the hole and she was hesitant to help. We kept at it a few times and I think I got it on like the 3rd attempt. We're still together to this day though, so I guess it was worth the embarrassment. |
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| Deleted User | Nov 19 2014, 12:40 PM Post #12 |
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Deleted User
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You've only fucked one person in your entire life? |
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| Refugee Roundhouse | Nov 19 2014, 01:17 PM Post #13 |
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#1 Tito Ortiz Fan
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He's Krazo! |
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| cheeto101 | Nov 19 2014, 01:47 PM Post #14 |
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I have only slept with my wife. I was super religious up until I was 24 or 25 (which is when I met my wife), but prob would have gone for it earlier on (due to being a teenager with no self control) but I was always dating girls who wouldnt let me get past first base. |
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| Deleted User | Nov 19 2014, 02:10 PM Post #15 |
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Deleted User
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wow...that's insane |
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2:58 AM Jul 13