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SUBMITTED: Commend Antarctic Oasis
Topic Started: Mar 12 2010, 06:03 PM (533 Views)
mousebumples
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Having gotten permission from The Palentine to modify/redraft his original proposal, here's my version (in the IC format that I'm most comfortable writing in):

Proposed Text
 
Commend Antarctic Oasis
A resolution to recognize outstanding contribution by a nation or region.

THE WORLD ASSEMBLY:

NOTES that 17 Antarctic Oasis nations have authored 49 successful resolutions in total, within both the NSUN and NSWA;

DETAILS that these passed resolutions cover a wide variety of topics, including education, economics, child pornography, necrophilia, terrorism, naval protocols, and also the highly controversial subject of abortion;

LAUDS Antarctic Oasis as only one of the above passed resolutions has as of yet been repealed, which demonstrates a strength in proposal writing and ensures that the region’s efforts have affected all WA member nations;

OBSERVES that diplomats from Antarctic Oasis are frequently found in the Strangers’ Bar and that they have contributed greatly to the atmosphere and ambiance of that drinking establishment - provided that they are not brawling, lighting fires, causing explosions, and/or pranking other diplomats;

APPRECIATES the entertainment value that diplomats of Antarctic Oasis have added to World Assembly floor debates with their inclusion of shockingly profane dolphins, destructor bunnies, pie fights, water fights, karaoke contests, and more;

DOCUMENTS the other contributions that members of Antarctic Oasis have made to the NSWA, such as:
• Highlighting loopholes in proposed legislation
• Unearthing indisputable archeological proof that the WA Secretariat currently known as “Ardchoille” was originally known as “Artichokeville”
• Introducing all ambassadors to the Thessadorian Ambassador and her considerable assets;

OVERLOOKS the other, less honorable contributions that members of Antarctic Oasis have made to the NSWA, such as:
• Soliciting bribes for votes
• Exploiting loopholes in passed legislation
• Employing gnomish war-bands and kamikaze penguins to keep compliance officials at bay;

COMMENDS the region of Antarctic Oasis for their many wide and varied contributions to the World Assembly.

Co-authored by [nation]The Palentine[/nation]


I'm happy to provide specific links/evidence where needed, but all of the details I got regarding the passed legislation was from here.

Artichokeville's existence was first revealed, I think, here.

Opinions are, of course, greatly appreciated.

(note: If you want to see all of the specific editing notes from Version I and/or Version II, I have the details here on the NS Forums. I'd do the same here, but the BB code isn't exactly the same, and I can't say that I have the patience to sort through what is and is not the same ... apologies)
Edited by mousebumples, Mar 15 2010, 04:23 PM.
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[unibot]
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Yellow Matter Custard
You've got my support -- at the moment, I only have two small qualms.

Quote:
 
ENJOYING the entertainment value that diplomats of this region have added to floor debates with their inclusion shockingly profane dolphins, Destructor Bunnies, pie fights, water fights, karaoke contests, and more;



Grammar? No?

Quote:
 
DOCUMENTING the other contributions that members...



You should change that to...

"OVERLOOKING the other, less honorable contributions that members..."
Edited by unibot, Mar 12 2010, 06:12 PM.
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sedge
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Sedgistan
I like it - its got my support.
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mousebumples
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unibot
Mar 12 2010, 06:12 PM
Quote:
 
ENJOYING the entertainment value that diplomats of this region have added to floor debates with their inclusion shockingly profane dolphins, Destructor Bunnies, pie fights, water fights, karaoke contests, and more;


Grammar? No?

Quote:
 
DOCUMENTING the other contributions that members...


You should change that to...

"OVERLOOKING the other, less honorable contributions that members..."
Grammar has been improved upon - although I'm not sure if Destructor Bunnies should or should not be capitalized. (It refers to a puppet of Yelda's, right?)

And I used your "OVERLOOKING" suggestion a bit differently than you perhaps intended, but I think it works out better, overall.

Sedge
 
I like it - its got my support.

Many thanks for your support!
Edited by mousebumples, Mar 13 2010, 04:32 AM.
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mousebumples
Mar 13 2010, 04:31 AM
although I'm not sure if Destructor Bunnies should or should not be capitalized.
I'm not sure either. They're RPed characters that I've used with Yelda and Iron Felix both on the Jolt and NS forums and in RPs at AO. There would be no reason to even mention the 'nation' of Destructor Bunnies because it's never done anything. The characters came first, the nation was created much later. Whenever I mention them I always capitalize the name though, I guess it's sort of like how you always capitalize the names of musical groups and football teams. That said, I don't think it really matters if they are capitalized in the commendation, just go with whatever you think looks right.
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mousebumples
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Yelda
Mar 13 2010, 05:46 PM
I'm not sure either. They're RPed characters that I've used with Yelda and Iron Felix both on the Jolt and NS forums and in RPs at AO. There would be no reason to even mention the 'nation' of Destructor Bunnies because it's never done anything. The characters came first, the nation was created much later. Whenever I mention them I always capitalize the name though, I guess it's sort of like how you always capitalize the names of musical groups and football teams. That said, I don't think it really matters if they are capitalized in the commendation, just go with whatever you think looks right.
Hrm, thanks for the input, Yelda. I'm thinking that I'll probably then end up de-capitalizing them - if only so that it looks more parallel (or at least less different) with the other items in that list.

Thanks for the contribution!
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mousebumples
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The draft has been updated again (V.III), and I've also added a linked re: the first mention (so far as I know) regarding Artichokeville.

I'm likely to submit this proposal on Monday morning, pending other developments. (i.e. a need for greater editing/redraft)

Thanks so much for all of your consideration and support!
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sedge
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Sedgistan
I'm fairly sure Artichokeville was around before that post you linked to, but it'd take an AOer to tell you where it originated from.
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mousebumples
Mar 12 2010, 06:03 PM
Artichokeville's existence was first revealed, I think, here.
Oh, it goes back a lot further than that! :P (I think it originated when the Kennyite president first tried to pronounce Ardchoille's name*.)

Heh, "Artichokeville." Yet another NSUN/WA meme to have taken on a life (and nationhood) of its own.

*EDIT: Here ya go, precious! :D
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mousebumples
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kenny
Mar 14 2010, 03:27 AM
mousebumples
Mar 12 2010, 06:03 PM
Artichokeville's existence was first revealed, I think, here.
Oh, it goes back a lot further than that! :P (I think it originated when the Kennyite president first tried to pronounce Ardchoille's name*.)

Heh, "Artichokeville." Yet another NSUN/WA meme to have taken on a life (and nationhood) of its own.

*EDIT: Here ya go, precious! :D
D'oh! Of course, I forgot to check Jolt! I just did a search on the NS boards, and that was the earliest post that I found. I thought that that discovery thread (linked above) seemed a bit off as it was quoting something, so ... yeah. Ooops?

Many thanks for the additional information/links! :)
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