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Arthran to Exterminate Flies. Medical Supply Stocks Rise in Anticipation.; News at every 11
Topic Started: Sep 11 2009, 03:04 PM (420 Views)
Zeit
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Wars are no longer fought by soldiers. They are fought by mathematicians. Soapbox Solutions is the most trusted provider of information security in the galaxy, having a 74% market share in the most hostile regions and the most diverse range of services. Based on Brandfall, our borders are commerce and we have offices on all of the nine worlds and among major alliances. The extranet isn't getting safer.

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This is GNS. Real. Current. News.


We return with more stories.

The Arthran government has vowed to erradicate black flies from 21 Delsanjo today. An ancient music appreciation group had released the flies a few years ago to increase the popularity of an ancient Canadian song about them. The flies turned out to be well suited for most of Delsanjo's biomes and spread quickly. They are now considered a universal nuisance and the song is loathed. The Arthran government did not have any statutes against importing and releasing invasive species at the time, so the releasers will be grandfathered in if any are ever passed. The estimated cost is rumored to be in the billions, if not trillions, of credits.

In other news, we regret to inform you that one of our senior editors committed suicide recently. It is believed that he had developed Fraunhofers over the years. Stress from Delta's departure likely aggravated his condition and excessive exposure to poorly controlled intrasense finally pushed him over the edge. On behalf of our intrasense providers, we would like to remind our viewers that intrasense is perfectly safe for ordinary users and that Fraunhofers is almost never dangerous and has several other risk factors such <Intrasense Feed Corrupted>

<Attention: Unapproved Broadcast Forcing Entry>

.splitroute cluster:ironpantsroundrobin
.cloudfetch feed:js_live
Connecting feed to junction cracker for bypassing.


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The Journalism Syndicate: Liberty through open press.


We interrupt this programme to broadcast a story which commercial networks have elected not to cover. It is our duty to recover that which has been lost since the second half of the American era. If it takes measures such as this to be heard from beyond the cloudnet, we will do so. Our responsibility is shared and our credit is shared. You will likely never learn our identities, however it is necessary to accomplish our objectives.

Earth has by no means said a nice word regarding Brandfall recently. Dr. Elizabeth D'Acadie, Dean of Brandfall University's Quantum Medicine department was on a lecture tour of Earth cities for research grants when the Chancellor placed sanctions. She was not deported, however the sudden drop in coverage of and support for anything related to Brandfall has effectively killed any hope of receiving enough grants on this tour to be worthwhile. It is believed that certain aspects of quantum medicine along with other euphenics projects in the Übermensch programme could push the maximum age of all people further than it has ever gone before.

Dr. D'Acadie is lecturing at Yx PMC's shareholders hall. There is surprising turnout. I don't know why mercenaries would be interested in this, but they have had to open the hall to accommodate them all.

<js feed of yx pmc hall>
One of the problems we have proven is metabolism. Replace as much of it as possible and approximately 90% the harm will disappear. They would never let you test it on so much as a carrot here, however we have already secured permission and begun clinical trials of the devices at home. We regulate te PFFT!

Screams

</js feed of yx pmc hall>

WHAT THE KAK! I believe you've just witnessed Dr. D'Acadie being assassinated on live broadcast! You heard it first from us...and probably only from us. They won't play this on the evening news. I'm being told by my colleague that the projectile's velocity was far too great to have been from a railgun and that an energy weapon could not have blown her head off like that. Did whoever is responsible kill her because we broadcasted her lecture?

Pardon? Apparently one of our friends wants us to play a track before GNS, Delta, and those other guys restore control over their networks. What exactly?

<Caution: Strong Intrasense>
<Caution: Inten
<CAUTION: D
<DANGER>
<DANGER!>
<!DANGER!>
<!!!>



System reboot...
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This is GNS. Real. Current. News.


Ladies and Gentlemen, we apologise for the brief lapse in service. Several news networks were struck by a renegade band of hackers who will stop at nothing to drive our galaxy into chaos. We believe that they doctored some footage in order to draw our viewers attention. They released an unidentified and unprecedented sort of programme which caused viewers' intrasense units to fail and drive neurotransmitters into deadly levels. From the calls flooding in and the crash of emotr™ our AIs estimate that as many as millions of casualties may have occured in only the first few seconds of the broadcast, more from affiliates and after brief resistance from the end users. Delta viewers were hit harder since Delta could not take our security division with them and they had artificially amplified the intrasense of their programmes to attract viewers from GNS. GNSHQ right now is just beginning to work on this story, obviously calling our sources and trying to figure out exactly what happened, but clearly something relatively devastating happening today.
Edited by Zeit, Sep 11 2009, 04:47 PM.
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