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[ti]Red ribbon[/ti]Missing Words Contest
Topic Started: Nov 13 2012, 01:12 PM (1,202 Views)
CJ
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A very minor case of serious brain damage

Those of you who watch Have I Got News For You? will know that in the final round of the show, the contestants are shown news headlines with certain words blanked out, and the idea is to suggest what the missing words might be.

This contest follows a similar format: I post one news headline, one quotation, and one well-known idiom with certain words blanked out, and the object is to fill the blanks in the funniest way you can (we don't care about getting what they originally said - that will often be easy enough to look up anyway :P !).

Now, the boring bit where I list the rules:
  • You can enter up to two times for each category, but only your best entry in each category will be counted.
  • Answers don't necessarily have to be just one word, but do try to keep them brief. As a rule of thumb, if your answer is longer than the rest of the sentence, it's probably too long.
  • If you're hosting the current round, you may not enter, unless you use multiple judges for that round (or appoint someone else as the judge, who may not enter themselves).
  • Each round of the contest runs for five days.
  • Prizes are awarded in each category as follows:
    • 15 posts - 1st place
    • 10 posts - 2nd place
    • 5 posts - 3rd place
    • Hosting the next round - Whoever wins the most posts across all three categories. If it's tied, any of the winners may host the next round. If the winner(s) don't host within three days, then they forfeit the right to do so, and anyone may host.
    • Posted Image Red Ribbon - 1st place in all three categories in the same round. Awarded only if at least three people enter.

So, here are the first three missing words. You don't have to enter all three at once; if you only have a good idea for one, that's fine, and you can enter the rest later (or even not at all):

News headline: "_______ rises to 2.7%"
Quotation: "I am not a _______" - Richard Nixon
Idiom: "Don't put all your eggs in _______"

Good luck!
Edited by CJ, Nov 17 2012, 11:54 AM.
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Pyrite
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Just as Planned

News headline: "Employement rises to 2.7%"
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thecostumedanceparty
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My one suggestion may to be to have one per category since there are three different options (instead of a total of nine guesses, I'm thinking three). Of course, this is just an idea. It's your call.
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CJ
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A very minor case of serious brain damage

We'll meet halfway, then. I'll set it to two.
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thecostumedanceparty
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It can only be one word for each, right?
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CJ
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A very minor case of serious brain damage

It doesn't have to be just one word, but try to keep it brief.

For the first one, for example, something like "Train punctuality rate rises to 2.7%" would be fine, but "Passengers rejoice as train punctuality rate rises to 2.7%" would probably be too long. (I say 'probably'; if it is too long, I'll let you know at the time, and it won't count as one of your two entries in that category)
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Pyrite
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Just as Planned

Idiom: "Don't put all your eggs in the bin!"
Quotation: "I am not a happy bunny" - Richard Nixon
Edited by Pyrite, Nov 15 2012, 07:40 PM.
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Pyrite
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Just as Planned

Come on guys! I don't want to win a red ribbon by being the only person to enter :P .

Idiom: "Don't put all your eggs in Pokémon Day Care"
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CJ
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A very minor case of serious brain damage

It's awarded only if at least three people enter. That was supposed to be in the rules from the start, but for some reason, I forgot to put it in :( . It's in now, though.
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thecostumedanceparty
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"Don't put all your eggs in the co.cc domain."
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CJ
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A very minor case of serious brain damage

Nice entries:

Just a bit of advanced notice: I'll close this in 22 hours. I would say 24, but I don't think I'll be awake then.
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thecostumedanceparty
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"I am not a ninja"

"Propaganda rises to 2.7%"
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Pyrite
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Just as Planned

News headline: "Nick Clegg's popularity rises to 2.7%"
Quotation: "I am not a Nazi" - Richard Nixon
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CJ
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A very minor case of serious brain damage

Some good entries here - and they weren't that easy to judge, but here are the winners:

News headline:
1st: Daniel - "Nick Clegg's popularity rises to 2.7%"
2nd: Adam - "Propaganda rises to 2.7%"

Quotation:
1st: Daniel - "I am not a happy bunny" - Richard Nixon
2nd: Adam - "I am not a ninja" - Richard Nixon (This was close - this category was the hardest to judge)

Idiom:
1st: Adam - "Don't put all your eggs in the co.cc domain." (I loved this one!)
2nd: Daniel - "Don't put all your eggs in Pokémon Day Care"

So, Daniel wins 40 points overall, while Adam wins 35.

Congrats, Daniel! You get to do the next one. It doesn't have to be a news headline, quotation and idiom; it could be two news headlines and a quotation; three idioms; or even include something else altogether (like an advertising slogan). Whatever it is, I'll look forward to seeing what you come up with!
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Pyrite
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Just as Planned

Wow! I actually wasn't happy with either of my entries for the Richard Nixon quote (I also loved Adam's co.cc entry, I thought it was the best entry of the round).

Anyway, here's the next three:

Quote: "Please don’t call me arrogant, but I’m European champion and I think I’m a ________" - José Mourinho
Idiom: "Look before you _______ "
Advertising Slogan: "Ideas for ______ "

If you didn't already know, the last one is the slogan for Panasonic.
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CJ
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A very minor case of serious brain damage

Quote: "Please don’t call me arrogant, but I’m European champion and I think I’m a demigod" - José Mourinho
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thecostumedanceparty
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May I make a suggestion?

It might be easier if we give a common theme to go with these three entries, otherwise I'm personally lost. Like someone could say "ball" or "crown" and people would have to answer the three blanks along one of the said themes.

That being said, "Please don’t call me arrogant, but I’m European champion and I think I’m a monument."
Edited by thecostumedanceparty, Nov 19 2012, 03:26 PM.
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CJ
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A very minor case of serious brain damage

That sounds quite limiting, really. It would probably make things harder, both for hosts and entrants. Besides, imposing a box inside which people have to think would take away the opportunity for great outside-the-box answers, like your answer about the co.cc domain in the previous round.
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thecostumedanceparty
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"Ideas for suppuration."
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CJ
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A very minor case of serious brain damage

Idiom: "Look before you cross the road."
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thecostumedanceparty
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"Ideas for kitchen factory."
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Pyrite
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Just as Planned

This one's overrun a bit (sorry about that). I liked all of the entries.

Anyway, here are the results:

Quote:
1st: Adam - "Please don’t call me arrogant, but I’m European champion and I think I’m a monument" - José Mourinho
2nd: CJ - "Please don’t call me arrogant, but I’m European champion and I think I’m a demigod" - José Mourinho

Idiom:
1st: CJ - "Look before you cross the road"

Advertising Slogan:
1st: Adam - "Ideas for kitchen factory"

So Adam has 30 points, and CJ has 25 points.

Congratulations, Adam! Your turn to do the next one.
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CJ
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A very minor case of serious brain damage

Congrats, Adam!
Congrats, Adam :) !
Congrats, Adam :) !
Edited by CJ, Nov 26 2012, 01:13 PM.
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thecostumedanceparty
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Thanks, guys. Here's the new ones (I adjusted one to fit the context):

Quotation: "It is not in the stars to hold our destiny, but in _______" - William Shakespeare

Advertising Slogan: "How many licks does it take to get to the center of a _______?" - Tootsie Roll pops (adjusted a bit to fit the context)

Idiom: "Iron in the ______"
Edited by thecostumedanceparty, Nov 26 2012, 02:38 PM.
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Pyrite
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Just as Planned

Quotation: "It is not in the stars to hold our destiny, but in 42" - William Shakespeare
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CJ
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A very minor case of serious brain damage

Advertising Slogan: "How many licks does it take to get to the center of a political scandal?"
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Pyrite
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Just as Planned

Advertising Slogan: "How many licks does it take to get to the center of a UN conference?"
Edited by Pyrite, Nov 26 2012, 03:19 PM.
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CJ
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A very minor case of serious brain damage

Quotation: "It is not in the stars to hold our destiny, but in Chuck Norris" - William Shakespeare

(I myself think that Chuck Norris jokes are annoyingly over-used, so that makes me a hypocrite :P )

Or, one for the Apple fanboys:

Quotation: "It is not in the stars to hold our destiny, but in Steve Jobs" - William Shakespeare
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Pyrite
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Just as Planned

Quotation: "It is not in the stars to hold our destiny, but in The Coffee House" - William Shakespeare

Couldn't resist.
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thecostumedanceparty
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Some good entries so far, this will be tough to decide.
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