Leaves

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Leaves; A VERY short poem!
Topic Started: Jun 3 2008, 11:22 PM (119 Views)
Lightning	Jun 3 2008, 11:22 PM Post #1
Bring it on Posts: 198 Group: Members Member #2 Joined: Jun 3, 2008	I made this up a long time ago...Ok, maybe last year. Millions of colors Millions of leaves It is so beautiful up in the trees So what do you think? I know there's not much to say about it since it's so short...



Lykaios	Jun 4 2008, 07:39 AM Post #2
Administrator Posts: 671 Group: Admins Member #1 Joined: May 23, 2008	I agree that it's very small but dispite this I still had an image in my head of standing at the base of an autumn tree-trunk and gazing upwards through the branches at all the coloured leaves, so it got the desired effect I think. Well done.
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Lightning	Jun 4 2008, 03:52 PM Post #3
Bring it on Posts: 198 Group: Members Member #2 Joined: Jun 3, 2008	Thanks.



Argentum	Jun 22 2008, 02:27 PM Post #4
Pirate Wannabe Posts: 129 Group: Moderator Member #8 Joined: Jun 21, 2008	Quote: Millions of colors Millions of leaves It is so beautiful up in the trees I think this ending line could be a bit better. It's kind of awkward with the rest of the poem and the stresses in the rhythm don't really flow with the words. Nice imagery for a three-line poem. The only thing that was off was, as I mentioned, the last line.
	'People want to know why I do this, why I write such gross stuff. I like to tell them I have the heart of a small boy... ...and I keep it in a jar on my desk.' - Stephen King


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