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| Al's favorite ED copypastas; And some random flaming, eltisim, and death threat copypastas | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Mar 19 2011, 08:36 AM (371 Views) | |
| Albino | Mar 19 2011, 08:36 AM Post #1 |
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The Second Triumvir
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Encyclopedia Dramatica's copypasta archives Be aware, since this is ED, some of those copypastas are...disturbing. You have been warned. However, the copypastas in this topic are not. Well, you could make a case for Ebon's skinless acid bath copypasta, but hey, its Ebon. |
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| Albino | Mar 19 2011, 08:37 AM Post #2 |
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I am Chinese man and very happy. We taking all your money U.S.A. Ha Ha Ha. Soon you will all work for Chinese man. Ha Ha Ha. We make everything, you make nothing. Ha Ha Ha. Soon you are third world county like Mexico. Ha Ha Ha. We will be buying your country cheap. Ha Ha Ha. We make friends with Muslims and will get more of the oil so you have little. Ha Ha Ha. You have stupid politicians. Ha Ha Ha. Soon you will all be very poor. Ha Ha Ha. Soon you all be dead. |
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| Albino | Mar 19 2011, 08:37 AM Post #3 |
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17 bashing SF and Life: Hey, LifeAdmiral. I don't think dondon is getting enough pleasure from just your mouth, maybe you should stop typing here and get back to using your hands on him, too. Also, feel free to tell your buddies over at SF that you're more than welcome to stay the hell out of here if the only thing you ever want to say is "We're better than you lolol". Feel free to keep it to yourselves while you stroke each others egos and whatever else you guys stroke for each other. |
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| Albino | Mar 19 2011, 08:39 AM Post #4 |
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So, I was in McDonald's the other day and this gorgeous girl, maybe 9 or 10, with a nice tight ass wrapped in a thong and shorts was in line in front of me. She got her food and was turning around and a cheeseburger fell off. She was amazingly fast and grabbed the burger midfall, bending over slightly and thrusting her cute little buttocks my direction. It was all I could do to keep from eye ******* her right then and there. She turned and looked at me staring at her ass. I looked up, embarrassed. She just giggled. She asked "Did you like that?" I replied, "Yeah, that was an amazing snatch!" Well, one thing led to another. I'm now writing this from jail. Please send money for bail. |
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| Albino | Mar 19 2011, 08:39 AM Post #5 |
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WHAT I REQUIRE FROM A WOMAN: They simply do not understand what a man desires. Quite simply, they would be a terrible "other" if you understand what I mean. I have outlined what I personally desire; and ladies, I'm available. 1. She must be quiet and unassuming 2. She must be intelligent and have a good standard of education and be able to hold a good conversation with me. 3. Good mannered in all respects. Notwithstanding this day of equality, I want her to e.g. a. Hold the door for me - Car, particularly if she is taking me out for the night and I have dressed especially for the evening: House door, and make sure I am safely inside. By this she must not be flamboyant in her approach, so that it looks unnatural, but do this as a matter of course as it flows from her upbringing. b. Stand up when anyone enters the room. c. Hold the chair for me at dinner particularly when out at a restaurant. d. Not embarrass me in front of friends, family and neighbours, e.g. talking in public 4. Offer herself as a sex object 5. Let herself be a possession i.e a car, tv, dog etc. 6. Treat me as a better. 8. She must trust me in all things and not be suspicious of my motives and she must be trustworthy. 9. Not assume that I will always fall in with her plans 10. Talk all matters through with me first and consider, and most of all, value my opinions, after all, she should want a marriage. 11. Not to be domineering and have the need to show all and sundry that "I am the woman, and I wear the trousers!" 12. She must respect me as a person, intellectually. 13. She must be forgiving. 14. She must be slow to anger. 15. She must love me unreservedly. |
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| Albino | Mar 19 2011, 08:40 AM Post #6 |
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Ebon's elitist copypasta: _______, you simply cannot comprehend how elite we are. For those of us who ________, we are the only ones who _______. Do you know why? It is because you are inferior! You and the rest of the cretinous wretches residing here, you cannot fathom how far below us you are. Please, were you any lower, a cockroach would be a viable substitute. I say, sir, that you lose. Good day, you get NOTHING. You shall be disposed of in a swift manner. |
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| Albino | Mar 19 2011, 08:41 AM Post #7 |
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Kreed's off-topic rant about being off-topic: This is your last warning by the way, these kinds of topics do not belong here and could get you banned. They belong in the "game help" forum, located here: http://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/2000236-fire-emblem-game-help I have given you a direct link to the game help board. Here the original post is off topic. I will ask you to stop harassing me and stop posting spam messages. Otherwise, you might be banned for the following: Flaming - Communications clearly insulting other users, individually or as a group, directly or indirectly As you are insulting our intelligence. Trolling (Inciting Flames) As you are CLEARLY flooding the board with your spam messages to annoy us. Illegal Activity - Communications that violate or incite others to violate the law As there was a subtle attempt of trying to get my account info. in your post. Off-Topic Postings As these kinds of questions belong in the "Game Help" forum found in the Fire Emblem split list. If all else fails, and you keep on causing distress among the community, I will lobby to the board of directors of News Corporation, the conglomerate that controls gamefaqs. Upon listening to my formal complaints and receiving my generous donation, they will have no choice but to revoke your membership to this site. After all, if they start losing profits due to traffic diverted away due to your spam messages, they will have no other choice but to permanently bar you from the premises. Thank you, (Your name here, or KreedDestroyer) |
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| Albino | Mar 19 2011, 08:41 AM Post #8 |
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by thatfeguy: One of the primary appealing aspects of the internet is anonymity. One of the primary methods of boosting one's ego is insulting other people. Because anonymity prevent any significant form of retaliation or harm, people can thus use the internet to boost their egos by insulting other people without suffering the usual drawbacks of such behavior. In an ironic twist, since so many people on the boards are self-obsessed, it's possible (and, in fact, quite easy) to condemn everyone for being self-obsessed. This can be taken a step further to "You think you are smart, but you are actually stupid", with the implied corollary of "You are stupid and I noticed, therefore I am smart." As another internet issue, since the concept of reality is particularly fluid here, it is possible for a person to make a claim with no basis other than their own word, and have it be impossible to argue against (or to put it another way, I can say "Calill's defense growth is awesomesauce" and nobody can contradict that because my perception is that her defense growth is awesomesauce and therefore anyone who tries to contradict that is wrong, because they just can't accept [my] reality). Since challenging reality seems to be a particularly egregious offense to everyone, this in turn boosts everyone's assurance that they and only they are the superior omgwinsauce. In summary, I'd like to point out that I'm better than you all and there's nothing you can do about it (and you guys are so cute because you think you're better than everyone else and there's nothing anyone can do about it). tl;dr Hypocrisy |
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| Albino | Mar 19 2011, 08:42 AM Post #9 |
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By Ebon: I will stalk you, hunt you. Every time you feel eyes watching you? That will be me. As you grow complacent, no longer turning about to observe the shadows, I will strike. By the time you wake up from your slumber, it will be too late. You will be on a glass table, naked. The finest medical gear available will be on standby. The cool glass and frozen air of the room will provide your nerves with sensation. The rough cord biting into your wrists and ankles providing a sharp contrast to the numbness created by the frost. You will be put on life support, first. Then, then I shall begin. A dull, rusted knife will come down and begin to cut. To skin you alive, even as you scream in agony. All the while, you will be sustained by the cold and medical equipment. When I am finished, I will direct your gaze to a television, which will show you a bubbling, boiling vat of acid. I will then, ever so calmly, tell you that glass shatters easily. From there, I will step back, beyond a line on the floor that states how far the splash created by your fall into the vat will reach. I will then shatter the glass floor that is both beneath you, as well as acting as a base for the table you rest upon. Your fleshless body shall fall into it, your nerve endings exposed directly to the acid. And I? I shall laugh, even as you scream in horrible agony. For what use would it be to have the acid so deep that I cannot listen to the sweet cacophony of your cries? Rather, it shall be shallow, that you might feel the impact, feel the shattered glass rip through your muscles, feel the acid burning away. |
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| Albino | Mar 19 2011, 08:42 AM Post #10 |
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The Second Triumvir
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By Slash: This is completely wrong! I cannot believe I just wasted ten seconds of my life reading this piece of garbage! In fact, I'm so completely enraged and disgusted, I shall respond forthwith! Sir, for you to say this is completely ridiculous. However, I'm sure that you, gentleman, assume that it is acceptable. It is not. And before you begin to respond, yes, I am right. For I am simply of a higher caliber than you are, for I am a near genius. After spending a few minutes here I can easily say that all of are lacking of any wit or intelligence whatsoever. You all believe yourselves to be better than everyone else, and I can tell you right now, that that is not the case in the slightest, you pseudo-intellectuals. I am much better than all of you. Clearly I am because I am neither pretentious, long-winded, asinine, discourteous, nor are my tastes quite as bland as yours. No, I am quite concise, and I would never stretch beyond that of my means or what I am designated to. I'd have to say that this board is full of anonymous lurkers, attackers, and trolls, who have nothing better to do than throw their elitist opinions around in an attempt at misguided show-boating with people they'd never ever meet. And for that, I give a wag of my finger at you. Your turn sir...your turn... |
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