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Topic Started: Mar 18 2011, 10:18 PM (1,102 Views)
Albino
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The Second Triumvir

A joke is something done to provoke laughter or amusement. Well I sorta lied. The thing about the word "joke" is that it's also a verb, as you can joke around, or be joking. But that's not all. Joke can also be an adjective, such as the term "joke topic" where "joke" is describing the topic. Did you catch the lie there? It is not an official adjective, as it is a phrase only used on internet forums, and actually is still a noun in the sense that the word "joke" goes with the word "topic," similar to the case of a hydrogen bomb, where "hydrogen" looks like an adjective but is a part of the whole phrase, which is a noun. But I went off-topic a bit here. I am supposed to be talking about the word "joke" rather than nouns. I've got to be more diligent in keeping on topic here. Did you notice that words tend to look strange if read too much? Look at this: joke joke joke joke joke joke joke joke. Does that look strange to you? I haven't trolled you here; here's another example: Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo. Not only does the word buffalo look weird, sorry I meant "the word buffalo" -- I mean "I meant "the word "buffalo""" it is also a grammatically correct sentence, unlike the "joke" one! Another example of that is this sentence: If the police police police police, who polices the police police? Police police police police police police. I lied though, that's two sentences. Actually I didn't lie, but I just digressed. Well I did lie that it is two sentences, but you get the point right? Oh dear I seem to have digressed again. I think the reason for this digression is that I have nothing more to say, as I have finished with the point of this essay -- er... paragraph -- just before I started talking about buffalo. That digression led to this whole mess about digressing. Digress digress digress digress digress digress digress digress.
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Albino
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The Second Triumvir

I've been a big Genesis fan ever since the release of their 1980 album, Duke. Before that, I really didn't understand any of their work. Too artsy, too intellectual. It was on Duke where, uh, Phil Collins' presence became more apparent. I think Invisible Touch was the group's undisputed masterpiece. It's an epic meditation on intangibility. At the same time, it deepens and enriches the meaning of the preceding three albums. Christy, take off your robe. Listen to the brilliant ensemble playing of Banks, Collins and Rutherford. You can practically hear every nuance of every instrument. Sabrina, remove your dress. In terms of lyrical craftsmanship, the sheer songwriting, this album hits a new peak of professionalism. Sabrina, why don't you, uh, dance a little. Take the lyrics to Land of Confusion. In this song, Phil Collins addresses the problems of abusive political authority. In Too Deep is the most moving pop song of the 1980s, about monogamy and commitment. The song is extremely uplifting. Their lyrics are as positive and affirmative as, uh, anything I've heard in rock. Christy, get down on your knees so Sabrina can see your *******. Phil Collins' solo career seems to be more commercial and therefore more satisfying, in a narrower way. Especially songs like In the Air Tonight and, uh, Against All Odds. Sabrina, don't just stare at it, eat it. But I also think Phil Collins works best within the confines of the group, than as a solo artist, and I stress the word artist. This is Sussudio, a great, great song, a personal favorite.
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Albino
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The Second Triumvir

Did you guys know? Thousands of people die from drowning in snow every year.

What can we do to stop this? Well, there's an organization that raises an endangered species that handled snow quite well. This small species is miniature in size and can only be seen with the correct lens or eyewear. Yes, I'm referring to the species known as Pikmin. Pikmin have been living among us for years now but they general population of the Pikmin species has decreased. Side effects of the further endangerment of this species include global warming, flash floods, and even abnormal weather activity such as snow during summertime or rain with no clouds. The extinction of this species would be a devastating blow to our planet's ecosystem and will end the world much faster than on December 12, 2012. However, there is an organization to resurrect the dying populace of Pikmin, and its name is O.P.P, which stands for the Organization of Pikmin Population. Join O.P.P and help us rebuild the Pikmin community back to its healthy state, that way politicians can stop whining about the ozone layer and all other ecosystem bullcrap. Find an O.P.P center in your city today to participate in weekly activities to boost Pikmin growth and promote Pikmin population to prevent further loss of the species. Too lazy to get out of the house? Just send us cash, check, or a money order to our organization and help fund our cause to increase the Pikmin populace! JOIN O.P.P TODAY!
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Albino
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The Second Triumvir

Title: Miyamoto got the concept of SMS from watching black kids in the ghetto...


Super Mario Sunshine promotes laws of no defamation of property, no matter who possesses it. The antagonist is seen multiple times painting graffiti on the walls of Delfino Island and many other nearby places. Mario is to blame of this felony and put in jail overnight for a serious crime he didn't commit. Being released from jail, he is sentenced to community service until ALL of the graffiti is thoroughly cleaned up. Many gamers have discovered from either internet news or blogs that Miyamoto creates game concepts from real life experiences, such as Pikmin being from his hobby of gardening, or Chain Chomps being from the memory of the scary dog when he was little. It is noted that Miyamoto got the concept of Super Mario Sunshine from watching black kids in an alley spray paint graffiti on the walls of buildings. Of course, they weren't spray painted huge Ms that were secretly portals to other worlds, but the idea of Mario saving the world from a crime committed in large quantities but in small places is an innovative and original concept that is to be expected of Nintendo games. However, due to the fact that Shadow Mario was a darker (albeit multicolored, but darker nonetheless) color of Mario, I have deemed this game and the original concept as racist. As I won't go into details about Shadow Mario because of spoilers, Shadow Mario is the only enemy in Super Mario Sunshine that paints on walls (all other baddies either shoots huge paint glops or spread paint everywhere). This implies that black kids only paint on walls for malicious purposes, but in fact there are some who paint to express their individuality. The wall is their canvas, and the can is their brush. For it to be assumed a felony is racism, and shows the ignorance of the onlooker (and particularly Miyamoto). I therefore DO NOT recommend the purchase of this game due to the racist content and ask that Nintendo remake the game in a censored fashion.
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Albino
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The Second Triumvir

I must say that essay is an abomination. Never in my life have I encountered so many misspellings, incorrect grammar usage, and sentence fragmentation. What grade are you in? 11th? 10th? Oh wait, I'm being a bit lenient, because judging by your language I'd assume you were in 4th grade or even lower. I expect more of someone of your calibur. Who would have thought you would post something as low as this? It's not a laughing matter, nor is it okay to post walls of text wherever you please. People visit this board to relish the knowledge of Fire Emblem and its many features, but what you post is nothing but a disgraceful piece of crap that newcomers won't learn anything from. Why can't we abide by the rules and give people something to talk about other than Glass having superior skills, Marcus being a god, and Lyn being a goat demon? It's downright disgusting. I remember when users here fought against mod pets with all their power just to keep a sense of comfortability here on this board. Is this what they strived for? By posting such a foul passage, you'll give the impression that they fought in vain. They didn't risk their accounts for people like you to post such shameless details. The sooner you realize that this board isn't just some playground for you dolts to pollute and destroy, the faster this place can return to normal, without all the stupid, disreputable, and absolutely ignorant posts. If you can never accept this fact, I ask that you leave. Just go and do not return unless you are fully capable of comprehending how things operate around here. I'm not intentionally being a bearer of bad news, but we are overpopulated with your kind here and I'm only trying to rid this board of selfish idiots who have no consideration for others who also post here. Thank you in advance.
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Albino
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The Second Triumvir

The time is five years to go before the end of the earth. It has been announced that the world will end because of lack of natural resources. Ziggy is in a position where all the kids have access to things that they thought they wanted. The older people have lost all touch with reality and the kids are left on their own to plunder anything. Ziggy was in a rock-and-roll band and the kids no longer want rock-and-roll. There's no electricity to play it. Ziggy's adviser tells him to collect news and sing it, 'cause there is no news. So Ziggy does this and there is terrible news. 'All the young dudes' is a song about this news. It's no hymn to the youth as people thought. It is completely the opposite.

The end comes when the infinites arrive. They really are a black hole, but I've made them people because it would be very hard to explain a black hole on stage.

Ziggy is advised in a dream by the infinites to write the coming of a Starman, so he writes 'Starman', which is the first news of hope that the people have heard. So they latch onto it immediately...The starmen that he is talking about are called the infinites, and they are black-hole jumpers. Ziggy has been talking about this amazing spaceman who will be coming down to save the earth. They arrive somewhere in Greenwich Village. They don't have a care in the world and are of no possible use to us. They just happened to stumble into our universe by black hole jumping. Their whole life is traveling from universe to universe. In the stage show, one of them resembles Brando, another one is a Black New Yorker. I even have one called Queenie, the Infinite Fox...Now Ziggy starts to believe in all this himself and thinks himself a prophet of the future starmen. He takes himself up to the incredible spiritual heights and is kept alive by his disciples. When the infinites arrive, they take bits of Ziggy to make them real because in their original state they are anti-matter and cannot exist in our world. And they tear him to pieces on stage during the song 'Rock 'n' roll suicide'. As soon as Ziggy dies on stage the infinites take his elements and make themselves visible.
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Albino
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The Second Triumvir

How to properly advertise for a website:

I was thinking the other day. About kool aid. What are your opinions on it? I believe you should go make some right now. If you need to, go to a place where they can show you how to make it; a website would work fine, if you needed that much help. Its pretty easy to put the mix in to water and stir it, but...y'know how you people are. Then. you can compare your kool aid to my kool aid, and post in your signature whose is better.
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Albino
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The Second Triumvir

As for this being an "annual event" or whatever, consider this an open warning for all Fire Emblem boards:

Next time I see any fad on this scale, I'll annihilate it to such an extent that you'll still be able to see the destruction when you close your eyes. I'll suspend every account involved, then scour their usermaps and suspend all related accounts. Then I'll hunt down any surviving accounts with posts on this board and suspend them if they're using the same IP as any of the suspended accounts. Then I'll check the usermaps of every suspended account once a day for a week and suspend any new accounts that show up.

Don't think I can, or don't think I will? Pfft. Try me.
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Albino
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The Second Triumvir

If this be a year's mark occurence, then consider mine threat a warning for all Fire Emblem villages:

If I were to stumble upon an insidious desecration as this again, I shall ravage, violate, and scourge it with such utter contempt that even with thine eyes blinded, thou shalt yet spy upon the devastation I wreck. I shall imprison every heinous criminal involved, then scour their gens and imprison all related kin. Then I shall ravage the entire village and imprison those who still possess the will to speak if they dare belong to the same bloodline as thou who have desecrated this place. Then on the first of the week I shall tally down each gens and slay every offspring that has sprung from your cursed women's wombs.

Think I not able, or think I indifferent? Nay. Attempt.
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Albino
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The Second Triumvir

By Malc:

Title: The Legend of Albino and his ADC

Albino is this strong, athletic, pure white mortal who is in need of an accomplice. He spends his time working under his superior officer Slash, who delegates various tasks to him day by day. The amount of tasks needed to completed is far from low, and damn right demanding. If Albino even thinks of flaking on his assignments, his supervisor and commander Slash would have his head on a pike. So Albino then decides to use a healthy amount of his vacation days to find a worthy apprentice, someone who can handle his job efficiently while he continued his objectives for commander Slash. While traveling the southern cities of the United States of America, he came upon a strapping young, but unrefined black scholar who insisted that he donate money to some unheard of organization that supposedly helps the cause for fighting AIDS/HIV. Albino saw great potential in this young fellow but realized it would take more than a hefty amount of lashings to whip him from unrefined to civilized. After discovering his name, "Malc", Albino began his apprentice's grueling training to become his one and only ADC. So begins Malc's training, where he was taught how to become submissive, listen and do as he is told, and all other basics that trainees usually learn before becoming an official ADC. It would take 2 months to finish training, but the ending result looked promising. And thus, Malc completes his training and becomes an official ADC of Albino. To celebrate, Albino offers to take Malc to a strip club full of whores and sluts from neighboring states. However, Slash is not pleased with Albino going over the 3 weeks he gave to him for his search. Slash immediately delegates that Albino become Phone and banished from the country. Malc, Albino's newly graduated ADC was angered to a critical point that day as he watched his superior be dragged from his own home to prison to await his demotion.

One week afterwards, the day of Albino's hasty banishment, Malc appeared to avenge his commanding officer and challenge Slash to a duel over the Pit Of Forgiveness. Why? Because he had been trained to do so. He couldn't let his master be banished after graciously teaching him many useful tasks and showing him the ways of the world. If it wasn't for Albino, he'd still be in the streets trying to gain money for some illegal organization. It was time Malc showed his gratitude to such a mentlegen and manually release him from his captivity and inevitable fate. Slash would not stand for such treacherous acts from such a lowly citizen and gave Malc an ultimatum; Be a fool and go against my ego, or be smart and turn back, effectively cutting off all ties that he just made with his new superior, Albino. In a fit of rage and unimaginable fury, Malc screamed that he wanted his master back and pretty much threatened that if he wasn't released and the banishment continued, he would slay all who he can making sure Slash is one of them. Slash wasn't intimidated at all by this declaration, in fact, he had nothing to worry about. Malc's power wasn't comparably to Slash's in the slightest. However, Slash was a bit amused at this young man's claim and decided to let Malc have his way. Ordering the guards to release Albino, he overruled that he was not to be banished nor to take the title of Phone. Malc, crying a sea of tears, ran towards his commanding officer who heard Malc's scream of rage earlier. Proud of his new ADC, Albino was content that he was the one, the only one who could handle his jobs while he kept constant check of Slash and his ego. And from that point on, Albino and Malc worked together.
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