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Cicada Nights
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me_irl
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"You either don't play and be a fucking good person, or go off the deep end and become a fucking killer and play the game."

But.

I understand that.

She couldn't get it out. Her mouth was too dried, too slicked with blood, too welded shut. She stared at the ground. Harder than she'd already stared. It had been so long since anybody had ever spoken to her in accusations and suspicions.

She didn't like it. Didn't like the arguments, didn't like the sneers and the jeers and the tones and the things that she couldn't do a thing about because they were arguing around her. She didn't know what she could do about that and she didn't know what she could do at all. She didn't want to do anything, at all. She had to try, somehow, against all god-given odds.

"T-tha..."

'That's wrong.'

'That's not what I meant.'

'We're not being productive.'

'We need to calm down.'

'We'

We? We, we, we, who is we? There are only two people in this conversation and neither of them is in your stupid head.

Rachael began to back off. Slowly, creeping inch by inches worth of her soles trying to claw into the soil like a desperate skeleton of a man to a mirage of water. The fence, the boys, they began to melt away, she was moving so slowly, seconds passed in centuries, she could do it, she could just turn and bolt and run and hide away from the unfamiliar voices and unfamiliar faces and unfamiliar thoughts in her own head

Her ankle creaked, folded, snapped. Twisted at a wicked angle against the earth. She fell with a guttural animal cry, flailing a brief but poignant SOS all the way down, she accidentally caught herself right on the shoulder and she heard a sickening crack, like the porcelain of a plate. Her scream of pain caught in a traffic jam in her throat, right behind the breath trying to come in right behind the breath trying to rush out.

The boys heard other things too. The rattling of heavy metals and plastics in her bag. Crisp and mechanical, the impact of her gun and the cartridges of bullets within against the earth and each other.
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Sad Tunes · The Cliffs
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