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| Real-life Rants; Vent here. | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jan 9 2008, 03:44 PM (22,241 Views) | |
| ~Alkarii~ | Jun 11 2008, 09:45 PM Post #131 |
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Soul Eater
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If I were you, I wouldn't really worry about it. You'll end up leaving yourself vulnerable, and end up thinking you're really in love with the first person to show either the slightest interest or care, and you'll come away from it hating them and yourself. The same thing happened to myself, and I thought it wouldn't happen, even though everyone was warning me about it. Came out of that with an ulcer, and I'm now not as... pleasant (not sure that's the right word) as I used to be. I could link to a series of LJ entries, but I'd have to go through and take them off of private, and they're from late 05 to late 06. Plus, I don't think you wanna read through my mistakes, which practically look like a soap opera. |
| Since my liver is larger than my heart, does that mean I'm designed to drink more and care less? | |
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| ~Qualanx~ | Jun 11 2008, 10:49 PM Post #132 |
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The Ignored
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Jessie, thats exactly what I'm trying to do now actually. I'm going to see if I can be a better friend to her now, and try to make sure no other punk can take her. But I think the whole thing that happened today was the doing of the other guy whose after this girl. Because I didn't hear the "not interested" from her; I heard it from a friend of some guy. And I hate that guy. Intensely. |
| Takeoff. | |
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| ~Norcar~ | Jun 12 2008, 07:01 AM Post #133 |
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Count Claudio
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One of the things about love and relationships and all that is you really can't try to become part of one until you're happy with your own life first. If you're not happy with your own life, then you'll just start relying on the other person to make you happy. Then when they inevitably let you down, you're back where you started, only worse - you have to contend with the feeling of losing a girlfriend/boyfriend. As such, Qualanx, I would recommend finding friends for now as opposed to potential dates. Get happier, get more relaxed, and everything will work out. Easier said then done, but that's my advice for now. Also, from my experience, girls don't want to go out with people they're friends with because they know them too well. I don't quite understand the logic behind it, but I'm sure someone more experienced on the forum (or perhaps a member of this elusive gender) could explain it. |
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| ~Alkarii~ | Jun 12 2008, 08:42 PM Post #134 |
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Soul Eater
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well, the way I see it, a girl won't want to get into a serious relationship with a friend because if things don't work out, it'll make it hard for her and the guy to remain friends, and if it's not hard, then it'll be awkward. I've actually had a discussion with a girl a few weeks ago, and it turned to why she was afraid to persue a relationship with a close (male) friend of hers. Now, while I'm not absolutely sure exactly what's going on, I'm sure things are going good, since, last I heard, there wasn't any problems (other than trying to hide it from people who would disapprove). |
| Since my liver is larger than my heart, does that mean I'm designed to drink more and care less? | |
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| ~The Boss~ | Jun 12 2008, 09:00 PM Post #135 |
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Native Son
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I disagree wholeheartedly with that statement. In my experience, the whole "preserve our friendship" argument is a bald-faced lie. Usually, if she says that, that's a sure-fire sign she's either with someone else (or several someones, as was the case in my situation), or she is making plans to be with someone else. Trust me on this. I have had a friendship become complicated by these very issues. It wasn't even a real relationship we were getting into... I believe the popular term is "friends with benefits." As a result of this... arrangement, we ran into all sorts of problems (including one major, potentially life-altering issue that I will not discuss here). Guess what? We're still friends. Close friends. Apart from that, I don't know what else to tell you, other than high school really doesn't last very long, and it will mercifully be over soon. |
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| ~Alkarii~ | Jun 12 2008, 09:16 PM Post #136 |
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Soul Eater
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Ah, but then again, I wasn't considering the fact that some women actually deserve to get the crap beaten out of them (and I forgot about my own experiences... how did I manage that?). Plus, I wasn't the guy the girl mentioned above was interested in, and the guy she likes has probably NO IDEA that she's even spoken to me about her concerns. But yeah, if she's deserving of a spot on Santa's "Nice" list, then my statement could be true. However, in my experience, it's always someone else who gets a girl like that, so my advice in this post is this: STOP WORRYING ABOUT GETTING A GIRLFRIEND! Seriously though, in my case, while I don't like being "lonely," I seriously feel like I'm dying when I'm involved with someone. Try waiting a full year without trying to get anyone. If they're interested in you, then make them prove it. Don't make the first move, they need to do it. |
| Since my liver is larger than my heart, does that mean I'm designed to drink more and care less? | |
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| +Lt. Jessie+ | Jun 12 2008, 09:28 PM Post #137 |
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Jibbering, Troublemaking Ball of Fluff
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Sounds like something between me and Draco... But that's besides the point. If you keep worrying like this, it makes me wonder if YOU are ready for a girl, not the other way around. Just be friends with it and let it plays its course. If all goes well, then that's good. If not, then just go down another way and find someone else. |
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| +CEMP+ | Jun 12 2008, 09:37 PM Post #138 |
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Clockwork Master
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I lack actual experience when it comes to the whole dating routine, as well as actually developing a relationship. Of course, this doesn't I don't feel like i need a little love. Nor does it mean I don't have any kind of morals about being in love. I'm careful about just letting my feelings taking total control; I'm not trying to suppress them, mind you, but i should let myself get carried away either. Ahem, the way I see, love, at least in terms of actual relationships, is like a kind of friendship. BUT, it's a very close and intimate form of friendship, and on some strong circumstances, where you and your companion can understand each other to an extent. Obviously, there are going to be strong feelings in this relationship, which is completely cool, so long, as i stated before, don't let them take total control of you. You have to understand that you companion has a life just as you do, and while you have an aspect about one another that makes up your relationship, you also got to realize said person also has her own free will, and possibly different goals. That said, any kind of relationship should generally start out as a form of good friendship. To see whether this will turn into a love relationship is something that should be forced. Well, something that sort of happens over time. Like I said, I'm not very well experienced in actual relationships. One thing I am experienced is the feeling of "Will I ever find someone to love?" To be honest, digging onto that question can really affect one's mentality and is generally not a very good question to dwell on at all. It may as well eat away at your mentality, and perhaps make you a tad disillusioned, although that might be a little extensive. Nonetheless, its best to always remind yourself that "Being single is not the same as being alone," and that's a quote from EGS. Other than that, everyone else said what I've could have said. |
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"I believe that the human spirit is indomitable. If you endeavor to achieve, it will happen given enough resolve. It may not be immediate, and often your greater dreams is something you will not achieve within your own lifetime. The effort you put forth to anything transcends yourself, for there is no futility even in death." — Monty Oum | |
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| ~Qualanx~ | Jun 12 2008, 09:58 PM Post #139 |
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The Ignored
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I know you all meant well but I feel discouraged from ever attempting to find a lover now. A while back I was a strong believer in the "Contrary to the saying, there is NOT someone for everyone" statement. I actually still believe in that. I'm pretty hopeless aren't I... |
| Takeoff. | |
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| +Lt. Jessie+ | Jun 12 2008, 10:20 PM Post #140 |
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Jibbering, Troublemaking Ball of Fluff
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Here's the thing... Love is NEVER forced. From the way you're acting, you're desperate and want to force someone to love you, but all you will get is feeling of pity, nothing more. Unless you learn to appreciate yourself instead of looking at yourself so negatively, you will never find the happiness you seek. |
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