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| Pokemon Squad! Episode 175; Barney D. Dinosaur and the Chocolate Factory | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: May 12 2015, 05:27 PM (94 Views) | |
| RayquazaMaster | May 12 2015, 05:27 PM Post #1 |
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Du arg, bror?
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POKEMON SQUAD PRESENTS BARNEY D. DINOSAUR AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY "A long time ago, before you or May were born, and even before I met your mother, I worked at the world's greatest chocolate factory: Barney D. Dinosaur's Chocolate Factory, on Unnamed Island in the Kanto region. The candy made there is the best in the world. But that unfortunately was also the factory's downfall. Other companies sent spies into the factory to steal recipes and the like, and Barney closed the factory. He let all his workers go, and nobody heard anything from him for years. But then, years later, the factory started up again! But to this day, apart from the vans with 'FREE CANDY' written sloppily on the sides in Sharpie, nobody has been seen entering or leaving the factory. Nobody knows what goes on inside." "But Dad, how can that be possible?" Max asked Norman. The two sat in Max's bedroom, which he shared with May, who already was asleep. "I mean, obviously the people driving the vans know." "Please don't ruin my true story with your logic," Norman groaned. "Max, this happens every time I tell you a bedtime story. Last week you asked how a wolf was able to pose as an elderly woman and not be noticed by the average person. And then the week before you tried to diagnose the mental condition of Humpty Dumpty and determine exactly what made him jump. Anyway, this really happened." "Please word it in a way that makes sense and is consistent then, Dad," Max said. Norman sighed and got up to turn out the light. "Good night, Max," he said, turning out the light and leaving the room. "This just in!" Larry reported on the news the next morning. "Barney D. Dinosaur's Chocolate Factory has announced that it will be putting five golden tickets in five ordinary chocolate bars to be shipped out around the world! If found, a golden ticket will give its finder access to a free tour of the factory!" "Do you think I can find one, Mom?" Max eagerly asked Caroline. "Sweetie, we don't have very much money," she replied as she pour him some orange juice. "So we probably won't be able to buy very many chocolate bars. And you always talk about how the odds are always against people who try these things!" "I want lots of chocolate bars though," May said. "This gives me the perfect excuse to get lots!" "You only can get as many as your money allows you, May," Norman said. "And even then, you probably should be saving at least some money." May sunk down in her chair. "I'll save my money," Max said. "But I also will definitely try to get a golden ticket!" "You're going to have to hurry then," Norman said. "Look at the TV." "This is Barbie, reporting live from Pallet Town!" Barbie said with a big smile on her face. "We have received reports here that local Pokemon trainer Ash Ketchum has found the first of the golden tickets already! I'm here with Ash and his mother Delia. Delia, did you expect Ash to find the ticket so quickly?" "Honestly yes," Delia said. "My little sweetie eats so much food in general that it was kind of obvious. He arrived home with a bucket full of Barney Bars as soon as the announcement was done on the news, and within seconds he had gone through all of the chocolate and nearly choked on a golden ticket!" "Ash, how do you feel about finding the first golden ticket?" Barbie asked. "It tasted bad," Ash said. "But if it can get me into a chocolate factory, I'll be okay with that." TO BE CONTINUED |
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| RayquazaMaster | May 13 2015, 01:02 PM Post #2 |
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Du arg, bror?
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"Max, come quick!" Caroline called a few days later. Max rushed downstairs. "What is it, Mom?" he asked. "Look at the TV!" she said. "The second golden ticket has been found!" On the TV, Barbie was in Opelucid City in the Unova region. "I'm here with Iris and her adoptive grandfather Drayden," she said. "Iris, can you tell me how you found the golden ticket?" "Well, normally when Axew and I need something to chew on," Iris began, "we prefer something healthy and natural, like gum made from tree sap. When we moved from the Village of Dragons to Opelucid City, there wasn't a lot of that easily available. And we both got kind of tired eventually of having nothing to chew, so we moved on to regular chewing gum." "Axew ew!" Axew put in. "Then there was the announcement of the golden tickets!" Iris said. "So we agreed to put our gum money into Barney Bars instead! It was only a matter of time before we found one!" "I'm very proud of Iris," Drayden said. "She's made incredible progress on her path to becoming a Dragon Master. She's also exceptionally athletically gifted. You should see her jumping from tree to tree. One more thing to be proud of for her!" "Mom, do we have any money for Barney Bars?" Max asked. "Well, May went out to buy a few," Caroline replied. "She should be back soon enough!" May barreled in through the door. "I spent all of my money!" she said, dropping a pile of Barney Bars on the kitchen table. "Congratulations then," Max said. "We don't have money for dinner. Thanks." "Do you want that golden ticket or not?" May asked. "Well, yeah, but you have to be more responsible with your money!" Max said. "Or rather, OUR money!" May groaned and began to rip through the chocolate. "Any golden ticket?" Caroline asked. "Nope," May belched after swallowing the last of the chocolate. "And now I'm wishing I had spent the money on ramen instead." Max was walking home from school the next day and passed by an electronics shop. In the window he saw a number of TVs showing Barbie in New York City. "Another golden ticket has been found already?" he wondered. He stopped to watch. "I'm here in New York City with June, the finder of the third golden ticket, and her mother, whose name I can't seem to find anywhere!" "You can just call me June's mom," June's mother interrupted. "Or June's mother. Or any variation. At this point I barely have a name anymore. But whatever. What's important is that my sweet June is going to Barney D. Dinosaur's Chocolate Factory!" "Mommy, I'm nearly (Nick jingle)ing 30," June snapped. "Stop (Nick jingle)ing calling me sweet, (Nick jingle)!" "Isn't she wonderful?" June's mother said. "So June, tell me about how you got the golden ticket!" Barbie said. "Oh, my boyfriend Henry and I were at a candy store," June said. "He bought a Barney Bar and said something about a golden ticket. So I snatched that piece of (Nick jingle) out of his hands before he could even open it. Then I opened it myself and found the ticket! I'm (Nick jingle)ing going to a candy factory, (Nick jingle)!" Max sighed. "This just in!" Barbie said. "I'm here in Providence, Rhode Island, with the finder of the fourth golden ticket-" "Use my screenname, not my real name," the immensely tall pale young man with long flowing blonde hair snarled, not even looking up from his New 3DS." "...Okay," Barbie said, still smiling. "I'm here with RM, finder of the fourth golden ticket! RM, how did you feel about finding the ticket?" "I'm a little busy," RM replied. "I'm playing The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask 3D, and I'm in a boss battle. I can't strategize with someone interviewing me- and thank you, I just died!" "Does that mean you can be interviewed now?" Barbie asked. "Of bloody course not!" RM snapped. "Now I have to make my way through the dungeon all over again!" Caroline turned off the TV. "I'll never get a golden ticket now," Max sighed. "Max, don't worry," Norman said. "You can do anything you set your mind to. How do you think I became a gym leader?" "That has absolutely nothing to do with probability," Max replied. Norman sighed. "Well, anyway, I brought you something that I picked up on my way home from work today," he said, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a Barney Bar. "Let's open it together." Max and Norman each took a corner. They took off the wrapper to reveal... "It's just chocolate," Max sighed. "Well, it'll taste the same at least." "Well, Max, remember," Norman said. "We have the same odds as everyone else." "We have worse odds since we have fewer opportunities to purchase Barney Bars," Max said. "Boy, you are just inconsolable, aren't you?" Norman sighed. Max left home for a walk through Petalburg City, alone with his thoughts. Then he saw something on the sidewalk. "A $20 bill?!" he gasped as he picked it up. He thought for a moment, then ran to the PokeMart. "I'd like a Barney Bar please," he said, handing the man behind the counter the bill. The man handed him his change and the Barney Bar. Max cautiously opened it and saw a tiny glimmer of gold. His heart raced and he hurried to cover up the chocolate bar. "Was that a golden ticket?!" the man behind the counter asked. "N-no!" Max said. "Kid, I'll give you all the money in the register for that ticker," he said to Max. Max ran off. "Everyone!" Max shouted as he burst in the door at home, panting. "I... I found it!" "Found it?" Caroline asked. "The last golden ticket." Everyone gasped. "You did it, Max!" Norman exclaimed. "We're going to Barney D. Dinosaur's Chocolate Factory!" "Why you?" Caroline asked. "I want to go!" May said. "The ticket specifically says the finder and one family member," Max said. "Dad used to work for the factory. Therefore, I think he should come with me." "I never thought I'd see the day I'd return there," Norman said, wiping tears from his eyes. TO BE CONTINUED |
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| RayquazaMaster | May 15 2015, 10:17 PM Post #3 |
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Du arg, bror?
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Soon, the day had come, and the ticket-holders and their guardians had gathered outside the gates of the chocolate factory on Unnamed Island. Max stood with Norman, Ash stood with Delia, Iris stood with Drayden, June stood with her mother, and RM stood... by himself? "Hey, why aren't you with an adult?" Max asked RM. "Well, I legally AM an adult," RM replied, not even looking up from his New 3DS. "That and despite living with my parents I see no logical reason to bring either of them with me today, as it was my good fortune that found the ticket and my money that bought the chocolate bar the ticket was hidden with, rather than theirs. Therefore-" "Sorry I asked..." Max muttered. The clock struck 10 o' clock. The gates opened and everyone walked into the factory. In the entrance hall stood a purple dinosaur in a purple suit with a purple hat and a terrifying smile. "Hidely-ho, friendly-friend-a-loos!" he laughed. "I am Barney D. Dinosaur! And welcomely-welcome-welcome-welcome-a-roo to my chocolate factory! Huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuh! So what are the names of my new friendly-friend-a-loos?" "I'm Ash Ketchum from Pallet Town!" Ash said proudly. "I'm a Pokemon trainer! Also I love food!" "That's greatly-great-great-great-a-roo!" Barney laughed. "You're definitely in the rightly-right-right-right-a-roo place then!" "I'm Iris, and I'm aiming to become a dragon master!" Iris said, blowing a bubble with her gum that her Axew came out of her hair to pop. "I'm a dinosaur, which is sortly-sort-sort-sort-a-roo of a dragon, so I think we'll get along fine!" Barney laughed in reply. "I'm (Nick jingle)ing June, (Nick jingle)head," June spat. "Touch me and you (Nick jingle)ing die." "That's not very nice, little boy!" Barney scolded. "I'm nearly 30 and I'm a woman, (Nick jingle)," June replied. "I'm RM," RM said, not even glancing away from his New 3DS. "If I say anything more then I'll have said too much. Or so I'm told by people who actually have social skills." "Don't worry, young lady," Barney laughed. "I'm sure you havely-have-have-have-a-roo plenty of social skills!" "Young MAN," RM corrected. "I'm Max," Max said. "This is my dad, Norman!" "Barney," Norman said. "Don't you remember me? I used to work for you!" "Nopely-nope-nope-nope-a-roo!" Barney laughed. "But I'm over 200 million years old, so my memory isn't what it used to be, even though that's only two dinosaur years! Huhuhuhuhuhuhuh! So let's get the show on the road!" He began to head forward. "Want some chocolate?" Ash asked Max. "Sure, thank you!" Max replied. "Then you should've brought some!" Ash laughed. "Want to be friends?" Iris asked June. "(Nick jingle) off," June replied, flipping her off. TO BE CONTINUED |
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| RayquazaMaster | May 16 2015, 08:36 PM Post #4 |
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Du arg, bror?
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They all walked down the hallway and reached a tiny door. "In this doorly-door-door-door-a-roo is the beginning to our wonderful journey!" Barney laughed. "Illogical," RM said, still not looking up from his New 3DS. "There is literally no way we'll be able to fit through the door. I would estimate it at being six centimeters by seven centimeters." Barney clapped his hands and the door grew to a normal size. RM looked up at it and his eyes bulged. "Let's go!" Barney laughed, opening the door. Inside was what could only be described as a river valley of candy. A chocolate river flowed, complete with a chocolate waterfall. Candy grass covered the hills. Candy flowers grew everywhere, along with candy trees. "Everything in this roomly-room-room-room-a-roo is edible," Barney explained. "Even I am edible! But thatly-that-that-that-a-roo is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies!" "You're a (Nick jingle)ing dinosaur," June said. "We're god(Nick jingle) humans. That's not cannibalism, that's (Nick jingle)ing Thanksgiving dinner." "She's right, turkeys are dinosaurs, much like yourself," RM said. "I personally do not like the taste or texture of turkey and instead have lo mein for my Thanksgiving dinner. That and watch Space Jam." "NOBODY (Nick jingle)ING ASKED," June groaned. "So have some funly-fun-fun-fun-a-roo!" Barney laughed. "Enjoy! Eat whatever you'd like, as longly-long-long-long-a-roo as it's notly-not-not-not-a-roo me!" Ash immediately went to the edge of the chocolate river. He began to drink. "Ash, sweetie, be careful!" Delia said. "You don't want to fall in!" "Huh?" Ash asked as he turned his head, chocolate dripping from his mouth. He slipped and fell into the chocolate river. "HELP!" he shouted. "My baby!" Delia shouted. "Ash can't swim!" "He's an accomplished Pokemon trainer who has HAD to swim on several occasions on his journey," Max said. "How can he not swim now?" "Plot point," RM replied. "He's going towards that tube!" Norman said. "That tubely-tube-tube-tube-a-roo goes to the mixer!" Barney said. "But he's too fatly-fat-fat-fat-a-roo, so he'll probably clog it!" On the opposite shore of the chocolate river, a trio of dinosaurs began dancing. One was green, one was orange, and one was yellow. "What are those and what are they doing?" Delia asked. "Those are my assistants, Baby Bop, BJ, and Riff!" Barney replied. "They likely-like-like-like-a-roo to sing and dance! I thinkly-think-think-think-a-roo what's happening to Ash has inspired them!" The three dinosaurs began to sing. "Ash Ketchum! Ash Ketchum! See some chocolate? Let's get some! Ash Ketchum! So big and vile And not smart but rather infantile 'Gotta catch 'em all!' is what we blew 'Let's send him flying up the tube!' But don't, dear children, be alarmed For sweet Ash Ketchum won't be harmed For sweet Ash Ketchum won't be harmed However, now, we must confess, Major changes must be addressed The mixer spinning 'round and 'round The cogs begin to grind and pound Boil him 'til he's piping hot (Though fangirls'd claim he's never not) Lo and behold, here he comes Not eating all that he can nom Not eating all that he can nom This Swinub boy, this chosen one Is finally so very fun For who could hate or bear a grudge Against a luscious bit of fudge?" "Guys, once you're donely-done-done-done-a-roo, please take Mrs. Ketchum to the mixer and reunite her with her sonly-son-son-son-a-roo!" Barney called to Baby Bop, BJ, and Riff. They nodded. "Okely-dokely-doo!" Barney laughed. "Onward!" TO BE CONTINUED |
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| RayquazaMaster | May 17 2015, 08:55 PM Post #5 |
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Du arg, bror?
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Barney led the group into the next room of the factory. "What's all this?" Max asked. "Thisly-this-this-this-a-roo is the room where my newest inventions are developed!" Barney laughed in reply. "It's a (Nick jingle)ing mess," June said. "She isn't wrong," RM put in, back on his New 3DS. "It would be prudent to have things more organized." Barney clapped his hands and everything became perfectly organized. "Better," RM said, still just looking at his New 3DS. "Anyway," Barney said, "unlikely-like-like-like-a-roo the last room, pleasely-please-please-please-a-roo be careful not to touchly-touch-touch-touch-a-roo anything." "Oh, hey, is that gum?" Iris asked, running to a machine that was spewing out what looked like sticks of gum. "Oh, yeah," Barney said. "See, I've been trying to appeal to the hipster crowdly-crowd-crowd-crowd-a-roo with vegan, gluten-free, organic, all-natural gum! It's... notly-not-not-not-a-roo going very well though." "Such a kid," Iris laughed, taking a stick of the gum and chewing it. "No!" Barney shouted, still smiling. "Oh, hey, I think it's Oran Berry flavored!" Iris remarked. "Iris, you're turning blue!" Drayden warned. "Quick, spit that out!" "Grandpa, don't be such a kid!" Iris laughed, continuing to chew it. "Pleasely-please-please-please-a-roo spit it out!" Barney said, still smiling. "It's notly-not-not-not-a-roo finished!" "I don't feel too good..." Iris muttered as she began to inflate and turned completely blue. "Iris, no!" Drayden shouted. Baby Bop, BJ, and Riff began to sing and dance again. "Listen well, to all of this, all of this about Iris Such a kid, she sees no wrong Snarking, snarking, snarking, snarking, snarking, snarking all day long Snarking, snarking, all day long Snarking, snarking, all day long Snarking, snarking, all day long Yea-eah Both snarking and chewing so fast, and though her growth spurt has passed Her muscles used for both of these stretch out just like melted cheese Snarking, snarking, all day long Snarking, snarking, all day long Snarking, snarking, all day long For years and years she snarks away, and chews nonstop every day Then she tries to do both at once, and her tongue is split, since she's a dunce And that's what we're so set on this, saving the life of poor Iris Snarking, snarking, all day long Snarking, snarking, all day long Snarking, snarking, snarking, snarking, snarking, snarking all day long..." "Wouldly-would-would-would-a-roo you three please escort Drayden and Iris to the juicer?" Barney asked. BJ, Baby Bop, and Riff nodded. Riff began to lead Drayden while BJ and Baby Bop rolled Iris. TO BE CONTINUED |
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| RayquazaMaster | May 20 2015, 09:17 PM Post #6 |
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Du arg, bror?
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The next room was filled with Pachirisu that were all cracking nuts open. "You have my interest," RM said, looking up from his New 3DS at last. "One of my top four favorite Pokemon, en masse. Aw yes." "The (Nick jingle) do you need this (Nick jingle) for?" June asked. "Thisly-this-this-this-a-roo is where my nuts get cracked!" Barney laughed. June and RM both held back laughter. "After the Pachirisu crackly-crack-crack-crack-a-roo them, then my nuts go into the chocolate!" June and RM continued to strain to hold back their laughter. "Finally," Barney continued, "it's shipply-ship-ship-ship-a-rooed out all over the world so everyone can eatly-eat-eat-eat-a-roo my chocolate and my nuts! Huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuh!" June and RM both burst out laughing. "Whatly-what-what-what-a-roo?" Barney asked. "Oh, nothing," RM snorted. "Anyway," June said, "I want one of these Pachirisu. These little (Nick jingle)s are god(Nick jingle) adorable as (Nick jingle). Give me one." "I can't gively-give-give-give-a-roo my workers away!" Barney replied. "Okay then," June's mother said. "How much will it take for you to sell June one?" "They're notly-not-not-not-a-roo for sale!" Barney said. "Oh well," June's mother sighed. "June, you'll have to wait until we get home. Then I can get you one." "(Nick jingle) NO!" June shouted. "GIVE ME THE GOD(Nick jingle) PACHIRISU RIGHT (Nick jingle)ING NOW, (Nick jingle)!" She grabbed a Pachirisu. "Chi... PA!" it screamed, shocking June. All the other Pachirisu joined in. "Chi... PA!" They all shocked June. June struggled to stay upright. The Pachirisu all began to pelt her with the nuts they had been cracking. She was knocked down a hole in the floor. "Sweetie!" June's mother screamed. She turned to Barney. "Where does that hole go?!" "Oh, thatly-that-that-that-a-roo is the garbage chute!" Barney replied. "I could have someone escortly-escort-escort-escort-a-roo you to the incinerator-" "INCINERATOR?!" June's mother gaped. "Well whatly-what-what-what-a-roo did you thinkly-think-think-think-a-roo I did with the trash?" Barney asked. BJ, Baby Bop, and Riff began to sing and dance again, twirling around the garbage chute. "The one called June, that vicious brute, Has just gone down the garbage chute And just before she meets her end Though a different one, she'll have a friend Though a different one, she'll have a friend Though a different one, she'll have a friend Someone just as trashy as her A smelly sock covered in burs A ripped up chair with jagged springs A music box that screams, not sings And lots of other things as well, Each with a rather horrid smell Horrid smell These shall be June's newfound friends Together they will meet their ends These shall be June's newfound friends Who brought her here, Yes who indeed? Who spoiled her every last need? Why is she the way she is? Sadistic and cruel towards that and this? The guilty ones, now this is sad Are dear old Mum and loving Dad" "JUNE!" June's mother screamed, jumping down the garbage chute. "Well, with that," Barney said, "let's be only-on-on-on-a-roo our way!" He, RM, Max, and Norman headed into the next room. TO BE CONTINUED |
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| RayquazaMaster | May 21 2015, 09:23 PM Post #7 |
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Du arg, bror?
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"This next roomly-room-room-room-a-roo," Barney said, "is perhaps my biggest breakthrough of all!" They entered and saw a completely white room with a giant TV screen and a WiiU controller. "I don't get it," RM said, only glancing away from his New 3DS briefly. "Thatly-that-that-that-a-roo is because I haven't turned it on yet!" Barney laughed. He clapped his hands, and an image appeared on the screen, showing a 36-bit image of Barney walking down the halls of his factory. He approached a giant Barney Bar and lifted it up, and an indication appeared on the TV screen to look at the WiiU controller screen. Max walked over to the WiiU controller and picked it up, and a Barney Bar had materialized on the screen. He gasped. "Can I..." he began, turning to Barney. "Yeppers, justly-just-just-just-a-roo pick it up off the screen and eat it!" Barney laughed in reply. Max did so. "It's a real Barney Bar," he said. "You've... you've mastered digitization and teleportation of matter!" "Uh-huh!" Barney giggled. RM's jaw dropped. He closed his New 3DS and put it in his pocket. "Hej. Dinosaur. Show me how this works," he said, approaching Barney. "Well, if you'll follow me to the alcove," Barney said, "I'll showly-show-show-show-a-roo you!" He led everyone to an alcove with a huge laser and a WiiU console and computer connected to it. "By using thisly-this-this-this-a-roo to digitize a chocolate bar," he explained, "and using the internet to distributely-distribute-distribute-distribute-a-roo it, I can sendly-send-send-send-a-roo anyone who has my video game Barney's Quest chocolate as paid DLC! Huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuh!" "Really," RM said, smirking. "You have this kind of technology and you use it to send chocolate as DLC. Do you have any idea what this technology could potentially be used for in theory? Well, actually, given PokeBall transport, nearly every other option likely has been patented. Except, however, for one. Player input into video games." "I don'tly-don't-don't-don't-a-roo follow," Barney replied. "Can't they already do that?" Max asked. "Isn't that exactly what a video game is? Player input?" "I'm referring of course to literal player input," RM said. "As in actually putting the player themselves in the game, physically." "That wouldly-would-would-would-a-roo be incredibly risky-" Barney began, but RM was already typing commands into the computer. "This is going to be perfect," RM laughed. "Finally I get to do something of worth with my life! I'll be the first person to be physically placed into a video game!" He jumped in front of the laser just as it fired and vanished. "Where did he go?!" Norman gasped. "Lookly-look-look-look-a-roo at the screenly-screen-screen-screen-a-roo!" Barney laughed, pointing at the TV screen. On the screen, the 36-bit Barney approached RM. "Get the Muk away from me, you bloody git!" RM hissed. The 36-bit Barney lifted RM, and RM materialized on the WiiU controller. Everyone ran to it in time to see RM picking himself up off the screen. "Well, I didn't account for the scaling difference," RM muttered. "Or, well, in all honesty, any of the whole thing where I rematerialize on the gamepad." "You're so much shorter now..." Max laughed. "You were what, 6'3"? Now you're between 7 and 8 inches!" "I dislike this," RM muttered. "I can't be between 7 and 8 inches! I'm iconically huge!" "Well," Barney chuckled, "I have a stretcher here used forly-for-for-for-a-roo stretching taffy! We can usely-use-use-use-a-roo that to make you tall again! Huhuhuhuhuhuhuh!" "Take me there," RM sighed. Then, BJ, Baby Bop, and Riff began singing and dancing yet again. "The most important thing we've learned The most important thing we've learned So far as total geeks are concerned Is the results of too many games Can oftentimes be very lame So parents, don't buy them at all For your little nerds, both big and small Oftentimes be very lame Oftentimes be very lame Ooh ooh Oftentimes be very lame He disregards family and friends! He's stone cold and socially dead! His imagination's found its end! His mind by no means can be bent! By no means, by no means! With no emotions, he can't see The things expressed by you and me! The things expressed by you and me! A strong brain stuck like super glue! Though his social skills already blew, Now there's nothing he can do! Nothing he can do! Nothing he can do! Regarding RayquazaMaster, And fixing up his state... er, We'll just have to wait, good sir, To see if we can fix his height, But if we can't, it serves him right" "Nextly-next-next-next-a-roo roomly-room-room-room-a-roo!" Barney laughed, leading Norman and Max out of the room. TO BE CONTINUED |
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| RayquazaMaster | May 22 2015, 06:08 PM Post #8 |
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Du arg, bror?
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"Wait, this is an office," Max said as he, Norman, and Barney entered the next room. "What are we doing here?" "Well, you're the lastly-last-last-last-a-roo kiddly-kid-kid-kid-a-roo here, aren't you?" Barney replied. "Yeah, but-" "So we havely-have-have-have-a-roo some thingly-thing-thing-thing-a-roos to sort out!" Barney laughed. "Stepply-step-step-step-a-roo into my elevator!" "Why is there an elevator directly in your office?" Norman asked. "Ooh, so much time, so little to do!" Barney laughed. "Oopsie, reverse it! Huhuhuhuhuhuhuh!" He led them both into the elevator and the doors closed. "I've pressed every button in this elevator but onely-one-one-one-a-roo!" he said. "Which one is that?" Max asked. "Up!" "Isn't that sort of counterproductive seeing as it's an elevator?" Max asked. "And in addition, seeing as you've pressed the down button, wouldn't you have had to pressed the up button? And-" Barney smashed the up button. The elevator shot through the roof. "Look!" Max said. "It's the others who came into the factory!" He pointed at the factory entrance. The first to walk out were Ash and Delia. "Ash, sweetie, please stop eating yourself!" Delia said. "But mommy," Ash, who was covered in chocolate, said, "I'm yummy!" Next out of the factory doors were Iris and Drayden. Iris was practically flat and was bright blue. She backflipped out the door. "Look grandpa!" she laughed. "I can't wait to go into the forest and jump from tree to tree now!" "It's good to make the best of a bad situation," Drayden replied, "but you're BLUE, Iris." "Don't be such a kid, grandpa!" Iris laughed. Next out of the doors were June and her mother, both of whom were covered in trash. "(Nick jingle)!" June spat. "Get me a god(Nick jingle) mother(Nick jingle)ing shower so I can get (Nick jingle)ing clean!" "Once we get home, June," June's mother sighed. "RIGHT (Nick jingle)ING NOW, (Nick jingle)!" June screamed. The next one out the doors was RM, who was immensely tall and skinny now, even more so than before. "Well," he said, "at least I'm taller than my 6'9" cousin finally. But there go my chances of ever finding good-looking clothing again." He took out his New 3DS, sighed, and began playing on it. "Oh, hey!" he exclaimed. "My hands finally are skinny enough for it to not be awkward to use this! Awesome!" The elevator began to descend and landed in front of RM. "Wait, what are we doing?" Max asked Barney. "Well, see, I needly-need-need-need-a-roo to give my chocolate factory to an heir someday," Barney explained. "So-" "You're giving it to me?" Max gasped. "Huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuh! NO!" Barney laughed. "Wait, what?" "You're poor!" Barney replied. "This is the real world! We corporate overlords care more aboutly-bout-bout-bout-a-roo keeping our own wealth than helping the people who really need that wealth get any amount of it! Huhuhuhuhuhuh! So I'm giving my chocolate factory to RM!" The doors to the elevator opened and RM stepped in. "Better luck next time, kid," he chuckled, crouching down and patting Max on the head. "RM even has replacements for BJ, Baby Bop, and Riff!" Barney laughed. "Yeah, when I used the digitizer I sent a copy of myself to every WiiU in the world," RM replied. "Here they all come!" A huge mob of 8 inch RMs began approaching the elevator. "The greatest chocolate factory in the world is mine!" RM laughed. All the mini RMs began laughing as well. Max started to cry. "Whoa," RM said, bolting upright in bed. "That was a weird dream. No more watching Charlie and the Chocolate Factory before bed when I'm on a sugar high from too much Dr. Pepper and Swedish Fish." THE END *Cue Barney singing World of Pure Imagination. As it plays, pictures of the characters appear and disappear with information of what happened afterwards. Ash resumed his hobby of releasing his best Pokemon on his team, starting with his Goodra. He lost nearly every fan he had gained during the run of Pokemon XY. Pikachu somehow was of use in an Electric type gym. However, his PTSD from his battle against Lt. Surge's Raichu was triggered and he had a breakdown that prevented him from taking over the world. Brock finally got a stable relationship with an attractive girlfriend. Then he woke up, and promptly cried himself back to sleep. Misty's anger issues landed her in a straight jacket. Even this wasn't enough to restrain her. Tracey sketched the ultimate sketch: a sketch of himself sketching himself sketching himself. Professor Oak finally managed to learn how to tell someone's gender. Now he struggles to tell a kid from a squid. Delia became increasingly lonely after Ash didn't contact her once on his Kalos journey. She has turned to Mimey for this for... certain enjoyments. May won the Hoenn Region Grand Festival. She used the tournament cup to eat ramen. Max became Professor Birch's apprentice. He still isn't over the fact that he has to save him from wild Pokemon and occasionally his wife daily. Dawn returned to Hoenn and quickly realized that Cynthia was coming on to her. But hey, no need to worry! Iris saw a Rayquaza near Blackthorn City and decided it was a sign that she would become a dragon master. Little did she know this was just RM screwing with her. Cilan opened a restaurant that incorporated every single one of his jobs into it. The critics all ran out screaming in terror. Clemont was positively thrilled by the robot uprising. He was less thrilled when people found out he had helped cause it and tried to kill him for it. Bonnie gave up on trying to find a perfect wife for Clemont. Now she simply buys him body pillows using her allowance money. Jessie, James, and Meowth finally captured Pikachu. Or rather, they went to Viridian Forest, found one of the hundreds of wild Pikachu living there, and captured it using completely legitimate means. They now wonder why they didn't do that to start with. Gary was forced to legally change his middle name to keep his job as a Pokemon researcher. He feels "Gary Motherloving Oak" doesn't quite have the same feeling to it. Paul went to rehab for his addiction to the word "pathetic". Now he's as mute as Red. Red's muteness got him into some troubles when he needed to call for an ambulance when he broke his leg. Nobody has seen him since. Barry received a fine for speeding. He's been arrested for assaulting a police officer for "cramping his style". Henry began acting in science fiction movies. He's incapable of getting any roles other than a younger sibling or son of the protagonist. June gave birth to Henry's child. The doctor refused to write the profanity-laden name she wanted to name it. RM finished his first year of university and began a long summer break with no real plans. A social life eludes him more than ever before. Sqirt began to compete with RM's multitude of new Mudkips for affection. He's given up on trying to take over the world as a result. Pachirisu's victory at the 2014 VGC was forgotten by the Pokemon fanbase. She now is obsessed with RM again. MM has more of a social life than RM. He never lets him forget this. Larry finally toned down his busy work life to just a single job: a nude calendar model. JonTron's video about Barbie's video games revealed her secret past as a sex doll named Lily and cost her all of her jobs. The newest Barbie doll, Homeless Barbie, hasn't exactly been selling well. Harley, despite the release of Pokemon Omega Ruby and Alpha Sapphire, saw no reappearance in the anime. As a result he has spent much of his time recently crying himself to sleep and cuddling his Cacturne (and winding up in the emergency room because of it). Drew and his Roserade finally revealed how they always had roses on hand: they robbed the French Federal Rose Reserve. Dora the Explorer was exposed as a fraud, being a supposed "explorer" but traveling exclusively through mapped terrains. She changed her name and returned to Mexico, where she lives in shame. Barney, following his show finally getting cancelled, turned to a life of drinking and died of alcohol poisoning. Nobody misses him. Barney Frank decided to run in the 2016 United States presidential election. He somehow managed to get the sympathy vote despite nobody actually caring that his brother died. Rudy and Snap adopted everyone orphaned by the war in ChalkZone. They all ran away after learning they would have to watch Frozen every night. George W. Bush was brought back into the news by his brother Jeb, who said he would be the perfect Middle East advisor should he be elected president in 2016. Everyone with a brain thinks both of them lack brains following this. Elmo expanded Elmo's Tavern, with it becoming the largest bar in the world. He's now planning to use it to take over the world and truly make it Elmo's World. Bert and Ernie were arrested for the murder of their son Bort. They soon escaped and ran away to Switzerland, where they went by pseudonyms and started a new life. Doug began reviewing movies online- oops, wrong Doug. Roger continued to stalk Doug and finally confessed his feelings for him. Doug for the first time in his life was openly rude in response, ranting about having telling someone in a relationship that you have feelings for them. Daria and Jane returned to the United States and Daria won the 2016 presidential election via Jane rigging the vote. Every idiot in the country left following a bisexual being elected president, and the country was finally able to progress. Buzz Lightyear and Woody Pride returned to the other toys and had the first toy wedding they had seen. They went on honeymoon in an adult toy store. Yep, you guessed it. Not canon, not over. See you again in 25 episodes.* |
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4:51 AM Jul 11