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Painful Truths; [Single Post]
Topic Started: Jul 21 2017, 12:38 PM (158 Views)
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Monika Apologist

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From: Momo
To: Ryuunosuke Makoto

Hey lil brother. Wanted to talk about something. Can you meet me at the grill at 8?
Text Message
 
From: Momo
To: Ryuunosuke Makoto

Hey, did you get my message??
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From: Momo
To: Ryuunosuke Makoto

yo, my shift's almost over. are you busy tonight?
Text Message
 
From: Yuyu
To: Momo Makoto

ill go
Text Message
 
From: Momo
To: Ryuunosuke Makoto

thanks!! love you!!!



The ride back to Momo's apartment was mostly silent. Ryuu stepped into the car with no complaints, strapping on his seat belt and staring out the window with an empty gaze. Rain pattered against the roof of the car and the windows began to fog from the cold. Momo navigated through traffic, occasionally glancing over at her little brother. She cleared her throat, and he didn't respond. Silence sat heavily between their seats.

"So, um," Momo began, breaking the silence. Her words floated out and hung precariously in the air, and she immediately felt like she'd jumped into a pool of freezing water. "Did you eat dinner? It's kind of late, but I was thinking we could get something if you wanted - "

"I already ate," Ryuunosuke lied.

"Oh."

"Sorry."

"No, it's - it's okay!" Momo pursed her lips. "Then, uh, do you want get a desert or something? I've been meaning to scope out some ice cream places, and - "

"I'm fine," Ryuunosuke interrupted. His voice came out raw and strained, and his body tensed up after speaking. He turned his gaze further towards the window.

Momo couldn't see his face at all in the foggy glass.

"Okay," She responded in a small voice. The space between them, devoid of sound, grew wider and wider as they made their way back to Momo's apartment.



"Go ahead and have a seat," Momo said, gesturing towards the small table in her apartment's living room. Her quarters were small and quaint, covered almost wall-to-wall in decorations that seemed significantly too light for the mood in the air: potted plants, colorful blinds, a bright lamp. She watched Ryuunosuke's eyes scan the apartment, lingering for a moment over the family photos Momo had framed. After a moment of hesitation, he sat at the table, crossing his legs on the floor underneath him. Momo walked over and sat down across from him, offering a weak smile. "Do you want anything while you're here? Like tea or a cup of - "

"Sis," Ryuunosuke interrupted. He fidgeted in his sitting position, pursing his lips. "I know why you called me here already."

Momo's throat went dry. "Oh. Right." She'd almost forgotten. "Aoki-chan already talked to you, didn't she?" Ryuunosuke nodded silently and Momo looked down at the table, cheeks flushed. The last few days had been a blur. She'd nearly forgotten that Kiku had asked to speak with Ryuunosuke first. Before she could come up with something to say, Ryuunosuke spoke up and asked a question.

"Who told you?"

Momo froze and her eyes widened. "I..." She shook her head. "I can't tell you that." She looked up from the table and turned her eyes to her brother.

He was wearing a quiet, lifeless expression. Her refusal had elicited no visible change in his countenance. Ryuunosuke simply nodded and replied, "oh."

Momo leaned in and peered into Ryuunosuke's eyes, trying to read the best way to move forward in the conversation. When he said nothing, she decided to steel herself and get right into it. She cleared her throat and began going through the argument she had formulated earlier in the day. "Listen, Ryuunosuke. I know that this is a scary thing to talk about. You've all been dealing with this by yourselves, right? You and all your friends on that, uh, 'Bedlam' website. You're all so scattered, and no one knows where any of this came from... And you go to those ruins a lot, right?" She paused, waiting for some kind of confirmation - a nod or just anything, - but Ryuunosuke sat still, so Momo continued. "I heard you've had your persona for... for a long time. And that you've been going in there, and - and fighting monsters, and..." Momo took a deep shuddering breath, and continued, "I... you've gotten really strong, Ryuu. I don't know when you grew up so much."

She offered him a trembling smile which immediately faded once Ryuunosuke flinched at the compliment, as if he had been slapped in the face. "Ah," Momo whispered. She briefly wondered what she had said wrong, and when she spoke again, her voice was lined with uncertainty. "You don't have to keep doing this, Ryuu. You shouldn't have to keep going back there and fighting and getting hurt and... and... why? Why do you keep going back?" She shook her head. "I... I don't understand that part."

Silence filled the gap between them as Ryuunosuke stared down at the table, hands placed in his lap. "I don't know," he mumbled in response. Momo waited, studying her little brother's face and waiting for him to elaborate, but Ryuunosuke said nothing more.

She sighed helplessly. "Ryuu, I'm not - I'm not trying to yell at you or anything. I just want you to be safe. And all of this stuff... isn't safe, 'yknow? I..." She gulped, taking in a deep breath. "I think you should stop going to the ruins. I know a lot of other kids go, and you probably want to help them, but there's no need for you - for any of you - to endanger yourselves. So many of you are still just kids, and you have your whole lives ahead of you, and there are adults who can handle this kind of thing - there even seem to be adults in your own community? And Aoki-chan already agreed to stop going, and if you have any other friends who are persona users, I'm sure I can talk to them too, or their guardians, and -

"Okay," Ryuunosuke whispered. "I'll stop."

" - and you shouldn't feel... like... huh?" Momo blinked. "You'll... you'll stop?" Ryuunosuke nodded numbly, and Momo pursed her lips. She waited again for Ryuunosuke to say more, but once again, there was nothing. The remaining arguments in her mind spun listlessly for a while longer before sliding to a halt and fading away. "I... okay," she mumbled. "Yeah. That's good." Another pause. Momo wrung her hands, and asked, concerned, "Ryuunosuke, are... is there something you need to tell me?" When he didn't answer, she continued, "I know this is a lot to take in, me knowing all this, but you shouldn't have to deal with this alone. We can tell Mom and Dad, too, and then - "

"They know," he said simply.

Momo's eyes widened. "... What?"

It felt like the world shrank around her, all the pressure in the universe converging and boxing her in. The blood drained from Momo's face and an enormous weight planted itself in her chest. She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. The breath left her lungs, and Momo took in a long gasp of air. She looked Ryuunosuke in the eye and asked, "They... they know?"

He nodded once.

Momo shook her head. "That's... there's no way they know. That doesn't make any sense. I - you're sure?"

"I told them," Ryuunosuke said. "When we moved back. That's why we left."

"I-I... but..." Momo's eyes were wide, and she felt paralyzed. "But why did they let you come back?! If they know, then... why would mom and dad do that? Why wouldn't they tell me?!" She leaned forward, resting her elbows on the table and running her fingers through her hair. "Or Kenji or Keiko or - or the police or someone?! I... why? I just... they let you come back here? Alone?" Just like all the other times Momo had checked, there was no hint of emotion in Ryuunosuke's eyes - nothing to belie the possibility that he was lying or joking or stretching the truth. She shook her head and reached down into her pocket, pulling out her phone. "This doesn't make any sense," she repeated, shaking her head. "I - I'll go ask. This has to be a misunderstanding, or something. I - Ryuunosuke."

Ryuunosuke had stood up. He took a step and nearly stumbled, as if his legs had fallen asleep from sitting stock still. His arms and shoulders shook, and he stared down at the floor, facing away from his sister. "Ryuunosuke, wait," Momo said, eyes wide. "Where are you going?"

He began heading to the front door. Momo stood up, feeling everything begin to slip away. "Ryuunosuke, stop, please, talk to me." Wordlessly, Ryuunosuke shambled forward, leaning down and picking up his shoes. Momo caught a glimpse of his face. His expression looked pained, tortured, and a thin sheen of sweat was beginning to develop around his forehead and his neck. "We can talk to them together, Ryuunosuke," Momo said, panic starting to set in. "You don't have to leave. Where - where are you going? Ryuunosuke, please tell me. Please." Nothing she said elicited even the slightest reaction, so she stepped forward and grabbed his wrist. Ryuunosuke froze immediately, and she stepped around him, walking in front of her little brother and looking into his face. Flecks of moisture were beginning to form in the corners of Momo's eyes, and upon seeing this, Ryuunosuke turned away. His breath was starting to come harshly, and his own tears began to form.. "Talk to me, little brother," Momo pleaded. "Say something. Ryuunosuke. I'm worried about you. You don't have to hide everything from me. I..." Still nothing from him. Momo gulped, tightened her grip, and said,


"I know what happened in Tokyo. What you did."


Ryuunosuke's head snapped up to look at Momo and her heart stopped. Shock, hurt, and betrayal overtook his expression, all of it directed solely at her. Momo staggered, eyes wide, and took a step back. "W-Wait, I didn't mean..." It was too late - the door slammed open and Ryuunosuke fled, sprinting as quickly as he could out of the apartment building. Momo's eyes widened, and she pursued. "Stop!"

By the time she was out the door, he had already vanished from sight, but she followed the sound of his frantic steps leaping down the stairs. "Ryuunosuke, stop!" Momo screamed. Her bare feet ran down the concrete steps, and a patch of stray rainwater brought her tumbling down, slamming the side of her face against the ground of the second floor. Momo ignored the throbbing pain and the blood running down her cheek, pulling herself with a groan. She ran down to ground level and stepping out into the rain.

He was already gone. The rain came down hard over all of the different streets and routes that Ryuunosuke could have taken by now. Momo's legs trembled, then gave out, and she went to her knees on the wet concrete. "No, no, no, no..." This was all her fault. She had to find him. She had to apologize, and then... and then...

Momo brought herself up to her feet and headed for the parking garage. The thick raindrops fell, soaking her clothes and her hair, and Momo could feel moisture, hot and cold, running down her cheeks.
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