| The Futility Of Good Intentions; [Shane] | |
|---|---|
| Tweet Topic Started: Dec 11 2016, 10:21 PM (394 Views) | |
| GKG | Dec 26 2016, 06:40 PM Post #11 |
|
when ur team wipes but ur ult is at 15%
|
Natsumi settled for a simple glass of sparkling water. She didn't feel like putting sugar or caffeine into her system on the off chance that she actually went back to sleep after that had been dropped right on her head. She was feeling far too awake and alert for that to be a likely possibility, but who knew, maybe with some help... She knew him well enough to catch that this wasn't the kind of subjects he wanted to dwell on - it was his tone when he answered her question, mostly. "Ah, that's good. I was afraid he'd get a monster, a serial killer or somesuch..." she said, punctuating her reply with a gulp of water. "That'd have been unfair for the serial killer, getting my dad as his owner guy." That joke would mark their change of subject. She wanted to know more, but if she wanted more information about her father's experience there'd be no better source than the man himself, would there? No point in pressuring Shane about it. She couldn't begin to imagine the stress that came with his nightly explorations, so the best thing to do was to be a nice girlfriend and make his warrior's respite as good as she could. "You're part of the lucky ones! No one I've met'd ever heard of Pele before I told them who she is." she replied with gusto. "There's not that much info on her you can find online. Didn't even have a Japanese article on Wikipedia! Not until I started it, at least." |
![]() |
|
| The One True Nobody | Dec 27 2016, 01:08 AM Post #12 |
|
"...does this clockwork hand follow you... or guide you?"
|
Shane quirked an eyebrow at Natsumi's joke, and realized in that moment – this was a sufficiently distracting thought to rescue him from his self-questioning – that he didn't know enough about Natsumi's current relationship with her dad to accurately judge whether this was simple black humor or an honest dig at the man. He decided not to ask (at least not while the man himself was a room or two away), and just swallowed a few gulps from his glass. It was a small enough cup that it was already almost gone. Her comment about Wikipedia articles got a genuine chuckle out of him, though. "Sometimes I think not knowing what our Personas might actually mean would be a goddamn relief," he said. "It's tempting to overthink what it says about you, sometimes." That comment brought him dangerously close to what he was trying to distract himself from. He sidestepped the temptation to think about it again, and drained the rest of his glass. "Or to overthink what it says about someone you know," he added. "I've just sort of... stopped looking up Personas for people. And I think you must've started that article after I did, because I don't remember reading it." |
![]() |
|
| GKG | Dec 27 2016, 06:39 PM Post #13 |
|
when ur team wipes but ur ult is at 15%
|
The joke was nothing more than a joke. The truth remained, however, that her parents' change of outlook and the efforts her father had made to reconnect with her weren't enough to radically change her own view of things. Her father was many things; perfect was not one of them. Natsumi could show generosity in spirit: for the moment, she was still unsure how much of it Ken Aizawa was deserving of. "There's only so many things that could become Personas to assign to so many people, after all. To me, Personas are kinda like... your horoscope. There's some truth to it, broadly, but it's the people who draw the connections and make it fit." In short: people didn't need the help of anything to bother themselves silly about trivial things, they did that very well on their merry own. She grinned and chuckled in turn. "Good! Because it's a crappy article. They wouldn't let me write in the school paper anymore if they found out." Delivering her music reviews had become an habit, one she'd started enjoying. It came more and more naturally with each passing week. "I'd give it five stars. Out of fifty." Edited by GKG, Dec 27 2016, 06:40 PM.
|
![]() |
|
| The One True Nobody | Jan 9 2017, 02:07 AM Post #14 |
|
"...does this clockwork hand follow you... or guide you?"
|
"Horoscope, huh? Yeah, you may be right..." Shane shrugged, and trailed off. Setting his cup aside, feeling like the silence would bring back thoughts he didn't want to be bothered with right now, he started to talk, slowly, calmly, but the words kept coming, springboarding off of Natsumi's last remarks into their own tangent. It wasn't often Shane spoke about himself "I don't know about writing articles, but I don't remember every trying to do anything and not being crappy at it before I got good at it," he said. "I wasn't always good at fighting, surprise of surprises. And you would not believe how hard it is to learn European sword techniques the right way these days. Kendo's where it's at with the hip high school kids, even in back in America. And westerners don't care about preserving that stuff the same way the Japanese do. Except, you know, fencing. A lot of the stuff I learned is, uh, I guess you could say it's an imitation based on what we actually still know about medieval swordplay. A system of swordplay reconstructed by people interested enough to obsess over it." His expression went a little pensive, though. "I didn't actually mean to use it when I first learned it," he said suddenly. "I just sort of, uh, wanted to do something not-so-Japanese. I probably should've stuck with movies and sports, or something. But there was this one older guy at my school in Kyoto, he was a real asshole. One of those straight-backed, stoic-faced holier-than-thou guys who thinks he's better than everyone else because of how traditional he is. I don't even think he was rich or anything, just a snob. He was a tournament-level kendo practitioner, though, and captain of the club at that school. I guess I just wanted to feel like he wasn't all that special. I don't know why, it's not like he gave me a hard time or anything. We never even talked to each other, I just didn't like his attitude." Shane shrugged. "I haven't thought about that in ages, I'm surprised I even remembered it. It's like, it all sounds so childish now that I'm sitting here with all this real shit happening all over the place. Like I don't even know what it feels like to be a dumb kid anymore." |
![]() |
|
| GKG | Jan 14 2017, 08:20 PM Post #15 |
|
when ur team wipes but ur ult is at 15%
|
Natsumi couldn't resist the compulsion of getting some light ribbing in. "I guess it's become all kind of obsolete since we have all these guns and whatnot, uh? Like I'm one to talk with my archery." Medieval swordsmanship certainly wasn't the worst hobby, to be honest - definitely more unique, than, say, collecting frozen dinner boxes. "I'm glad the circumstances have made it pay off, though. That's cool." She understood his reasoning, even if she did find it silly in the way that only a boy's reasoning could be silly. That seemed like a whole lot of effort to go through, just to show up one asshole in school who probably wouldn't even care - when ignoring them and moving on with one's life would have been far more time-efficient. But that was something she appreciated in boys - sometimes, it meant they went the extra mile just to be nice to the girl they liked. "Did you challenge him to a swordfight in the end, to decide which is superior?" she asked lightheartedly, letting her chin rest on her palm as an amused grin played on her lips. She couldn't deny the marvels that hobby had done for his musculature, either. That was a reward she'd always reaped with delectation. "I have some experience dealing with this kind of people. Snobs, I mean." she stated flatly. "Well, maybe not the same. Maybe your asshole was the real deal. Mines cared more about the appearances than anything. Can't hide much, though." |
![]() |
|
| The One True Nobody | Jan 14 2017, 08:37 PM Post #16 |
|
"...does this clockwork hand follow you... or guide you?"
|
"Uh, no, I didn't," Shane said with an uneasy laugh. "I wound up getting mixed up in other stuff, and well, you know where that went. I'm not really sure when the stuff I got up to went from being personal to being something I just did, though. I've never really... thought about it. I just kind of forgot about him in the end." Running a hand through his hair, Shane looked away, eyebrows scrunched up as if trying to wrack his memory for an answer he couldn't find. Then he shrugged, dismissing it. "I don't think he was the 'real deal,' I think I was just being a judgmental ass," he admitted. "But who was your snob, if you don't mind me asking? Is this related to anything you've talked about before?" That part about caring more about appearances than anything hit a nerve, but he kept it from showing on his face. Vaguely, he wondered if Natsumi would even be able to tell he was uncomfortable at all. It wasn't a side of himself he'd ever really shown her, mostly because it wasn't a side of himself he wanted anyone to see. Logic told him that if there was someone he should be able to trust with those kinds of feelings, it was her — and if there was anyone he didn't want to burden with that kind of stuff, it was also her. This emotional-support shit is a goddamn paradox, he thought. |
![]() |
|
| GKG | Jan 14 2017, 08:57 PM Post #17 |
|
when ur team wipes but ur ult is at 15%
|
Ah-ha! She knew it. Someone complaining about the attitude of someone else they'd only really seen from afar and barely interracted with told more about the complainer than anything else. Well, Shane wasn't perfect, but she liked him just the way he was. She hesitated for a moment, pondering the degree of detail she wanted to verbally recall or even think about on a mental level. This part of her life, as much as she'd mulled it over, was something of the past, but it didn't make it that much more pleasant. She settled for the middle of the road. "The people who put me on their shitlist in middle school." He'd know what she was talking about, even if she'd only ever talked about the situation in broad, general terms. "They wanted to seem all polite and respectable-like, but that's mostly because that'd make them look better next to me. People'd take their side rather than mine. Nothing absolves you like having your uniform neat and straight, I suppose." |
![]() |
|
| The One True Nobody | Jan 15 2017, 08:00 AM Post #18 |
|
"...does this clockwork hand follow you... or guide you?"
|
I thought that was it, thought Shane, although this was the first time, as far as he could remember, that Natsumi had told him anything about the people who'd actually given her all of that grief. He listened with quiet attention, only just beginning to realize as he did that it was probably different for a girl to face bullying than a boy. A boy, or even an older man, would always be confronted by the idea that his own lack of forward dominance was a failure on his part. It was childish, but straightforward. What, then, did the bullies focus on when they wished to bring low a girl? Going by what he knew, his best guess was a woman's lack of control over her life... they would focus on what other people thought, or how easily the victim's life could be changed for the worse for her... ...First-year psych-school crap ain't my bag. He tossed the thoughts away, hoping they landed somewhere in the vicinity of an imaginary trash can. Lifting his eyes to the ceiling, he voiced the only thought that had occurred to him in that jumble which he was absolutely confident in. "People will do a lot of things to feel like their own life is important," he said, shrugging. "Sometimes they just can think of anything besides trying to make other people feel less than them by comparison. It's shitty, but it's the way people are. I think it's better to find some way to feel good about yourself in a vacuum, but, well... people can be stupid about that, too." The unspoken admission that he himself had been stupid about that didn't need to be given voice, he figured. Natsumi knew him well enough to pick out his flaws without him rambling on about them. "Someday they'll grow up," he added, eyes flitting down to meet Natsumi's. "And the ones that don't, well, the real world's not as nice to them as middle school teachers might be. You don't have to care about any of them, you just have to be better than them — for your own sake, not for whatever 'take-that' feels you get out of it. Not to sound like I'm lecturing you or anything, it's just — " At this point he looked away, deciding to admit what he'd been keeping quiet about for half the conversation. "It's just that I've been thinking about these things a lot lately. Ever since I got out of the hospital." |
![]() |
|
| GKG | Jan 17 2017, 07:30 PM Post #19 |
|
when ur team wipes but ur ult is at 15%
|
The truth was, the way teenage girls bullied other girls reached heights of social and emotional violence that'd have boy bullies go pale in the face. Natsumi remained deep in thought, her gaze lost in the grain of the wood of the table in front of her. She answered Shane's statement a few seconds late, and even then her response was nothing more than a slow nod of the head. Someday they'll grow up. She took a deep breath, listened to the rest of Shane's words intently. She knew him well enough to understand that it was also of himself that he was talking about. "I know some of them have. I got a couple of apologies from people involved in the whole thing... No idea if they were genuine about it or not, but it's better than nothing, I suppose. I'll give them the benefit of the doubt." Her lips curled into a wry smile. "Well, you are lecturing me, kind of. But if that's something you need to take off your chest..." she said, holding her hand out on the table so tat Shane could take it. "...I don't object to being the listener. That comes with the job." Hospital beds were a fertile soil for self-examination, especially when it became something necessary for healing to even begin. "If you wanna know, you seem pretty grown-up to me. Saving peoples' lives and all that jazz." |
![]() |
|
| The One True Nobody | Jan 17 2017, 09:00 PM Post #20 |
|
"...does this clockwork hand follow you... or guide you?"
|
Shane winced at the mention of saving people's lives as if it were a sign of being more grown-up than he'd been before. The truth was, he'd saved lives before. It had been something he'd made sport of, dangerous sport, sport that frequently ended with him sneaking into a closed-down building to patch up wounds that would make most guys his age go green just to look at. He hadn't been remotely grown-up then. He had just been — — well, he wasn't that way anymore, and that was what mattered. "Thanks for the vote of confidence," he said, allowing a smile to surface, and finally permitting himself to reach out and take Natsumi's hand. "But I don't feel like puking out all my guts at once, and it's getting late. So I guess the question is, would you like me to stick around tonight, or would you rather I leave so I don't get between you and your dad?" |
![]() |
|
| 1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous) | |
| Go to Next Page | |
| « Previous Topic · Matechi Street · Next Topic » |
| Track Topic · E-mail Topic |
2:31 AM Jul 11
|







2:31 AM Jul 11