| Bass Bumpin', Club Thumpin'; [Jimmy, Mayu, Closed] | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jan 7 2014, 03:24 AM (718 Views) | |
| Sumitomo | Jan 20 2014, 04:05 AM Post #31 |
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Mayu hit Jimmy's apartment the same way ointment hits a skin infection. In minutes Jimmy noticed his apartment becoming much, much cleaner. He wondered briefly, irreverently, if this is what training montages in movies felt like. The amount of progress she was making in such a short time seemed inconceivable to Jimmy, despite Mayu really only doing basic-level house tidying. He shook his head. She wasn't here to be his maid! He shoved aside impossible (but momentarily tantalizing) images of Mayu in a maid's outfit, and followed her. "Mayu! Mayu, wait!" She was flitting around his house, a tornado of activity. "Mayu why are you cleaning my apartment!? We came here to drink, not to tidy up!" He stopped following her for a second, and plucked that sock from it's day-old coffee jacuzzi. He threw it in the trash and dumped the cup out. Maybe she was right... |
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| Natscookie | Jan 20 2014, 05:11 AM Post #32 |
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Indeed, a typhoon went right by Jimmy's house. It was called Mayu Nosaka. Dishes? Check. Remove clutter? Double check. Laundry? Hell yes. Taking out garbage? Check the hell outta that. Mayu was about to dust the surfaces of the living room and kitchen before the complaint reached her ears. She just shot Jimmy an angry glare. "Ya think I wanna drink in filth? Think again." Everything needed to be scrubbed to perfection. Her brain wouldn't let her sleep until the entire house was spotless. In short? The beast had been unleashed. |
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| Sumitomo | Jan 20 2014, 06:38 AM Post #33 |
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Lamentations followed Mayu throughout as she enacted that special kind of revenge only tidy people can dish up. "Mayu stop, pleeeeeaase!" Jimmy pleaded, his world coming down around his ears, "I can't find anything anymore!" Indeed, he had been looking all the usual places for his remote control (figuring he could just attempt to watch TV through Mayu's escapades, like he used to do when his mom would kick him out of his room to clean it) such as under the couch, between the couch cushions, in his restroom, on top of the fridge, inside his shoe, and, most importantly, inside his sadly underused umbrella stand. He failed to see in on top of TV, where most normal, clean people keep their remotes, and where Mayu had deposited it (after a quick dust with a swiffer duster Jimmy didn't even know he had). "Mayu, can we at least drink a little bit before you continue this purge!?" Jimmy pleaded, still tearing apart his living room desperately for his (unbeknownst to him) obviously placed remote, "Look, I can't even find the remote to the TV! Have mercy, woman!" |
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| Natscookie | Jan 20 2014, 07:16 AM Post #34 |
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Shitpost Senpai
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As soon as the hasty dusting was done with - because, really, Mayu didn't have all night, and wasn't Jimmy's maid - the girl seemed to look around somewhat frantically, as if looking for a broom. That, however, seemed to halt abruptly with a complaint that made her bring a hand to her face. 'For fuck's sake.' "Are you fuckin' blind for crying out loud?" She snapped, the free hand motioning towards the top of the TV. "It's right in plain sight, did'ja get knocked on yer head often as a fucking kid?" She groaned, now actually actively pacing around while looking for the cleaning instrument. "Where the fuck do you put your god damn brooms?!" |
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| Sumitomo | Jan 20 2014, 07:35 AM Post #35 |
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Huh. It was there. Son of a bitch. It never occurred to him to just put the remote on top of the TV. Fuckin' magic was happening right before his eyes. Her next question snapped him back from his reverie. "B-broom?" He blinked. He had one, didn't he? Jimmy looked to the ground, desperately wracking his brain. He felt as if he were a man trying to give a good reason why he shouldn't be killed by the main villain in a trashy thriller novel. With his spotty physical resistance to Mayu and her temper, that analogy may very well be much closer to the truth than he anticipated. "I think it's in..." He walked over to his closet, and put his handle on the doorknob. He turned it, and swung open the door. Jimmy immediately disappeared below a pile of unwashed clothes. A wooden handle of something clattered to the floor. There it was! The pile of clothing grew and arm, and felt up and down the wooden handle. Yes, there it was. Good broom. Then his hands felt something metal, and the blood froze in his veins. He'd turned his broom into a spear. Of all the times for his secondary hobby to inconvenience him, it couldn't have picked a worse one. The pile of clothes grew a head. The head had a scared, yet apologetic expression on its face. The head was also part of Jimmy Takahara Limited, a small, idiotic company who was fast losing stock with the intimidating mega-corporation Mayu Nosaka Industries. "Well, alright, now, in my defense..." |
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| Natscookie | Jan 20 2014, 08:33 AM Post #36 |
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"..." Mayu could almost feel a vein pop in her forehead as a monstrous amount of unsorted items fell out of the closet and buried Jimmy. She didn't bother helping the man, he deserved it. A part of her was particularly pissed off at all of the clothes, since she had already taken care of the laundry - at least, of whatever was in view. "................" A spear broom? Really? "In your defense, go fuck yourself." Mayu abruptly interrupted. To say she was pissed was the understatement of the year. "Y'know what? Tomorrow I'll take my fucking day off, come here and clean this shit top to bottom, and if it ever gets minimally dirty anywhere, I'll fucking behead you, got it?" But Master, he nulls any sort of physical dam-- '--Shut the fuck up.' The former hobo sighed out exasperatedly before quitting the chores, and dragging herself over to Jimmy's couch, unceremoniously sitting down and leaning fully back, to the point her head was actually facing the ceiling above. She then closed her eyes, and groaned. "I need that fucking drink." |
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| Sumitomo | Jan 23 2014, 02:20 AM Post #37 |
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Jimmy extricated himself from the pile of clothes with some difficulty. He couldn't recall how he managed to cram all those clothes in his closet, but it happened, and now he was reaping what he had sown. What happened to 'no girls are gonna come in here anyway'? That justification seemed to ring hollow now that Mayu was reclining on his couch. She was coming back, too. And her coming back meant he had to clean. Or die. Jimmy put his hand to his head and muttered to himself as he walked to the kitchen. Nothing tonight was going the way he'd intended, but... Hey, at least she was coming back tomorrow. Despite the circumstances this legitimately pleased him, even though she was probably not going to be impressed by his lackluster cleaning ability. He took a six pack of lager beer from his refrigerator, walked back over the couch, and sat down. It was a two seat couch, but he attempted to give Mayu as much space as possible - there weren't many seats in his domicile, after all, and put the beers in between them for good measure. There we go. Reduce physical contact to a minimum. Do not weird out the Mayu. "Help yourself." Jimmy said. He dug under the couch cushion for the remote, then, with a slap to the forehead, got up and retrieved it. He sat back down and flipped on the tube, the news channel blaring. "Police are still inquiring as to the whereabouts of one Daisuke Nomura, former foreman with the Nagashima Road Authority. Nomura-san's disappearance is the ninth of such cases within the company, following shortly after the disappearance of another worker a few days before him. Police have no clues as to the whereabouts of either man, who have both disappeared without a trace." "Ech." Jimmy flipped the channel. He didn't want to hear about that. |
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| Natscookie | Jan 23 2014, 08:00 AM Post #38 |
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"Aren't ya a gentleman." Mayu mocked while, indeed, helping herself to a beer. Actually, she took two - one was used for the sole purpose of snapping the cap off the first bottle, and it was put back in place. You gotta do what you gotta do when you don't have bottle openers. Mayu took a sip, and didn't mind the taste at all. Her boss gave her some alcohol to take home every now and then for a job well done; she had acquired the proper taste for it. She didn't seem awfully interested, though - the news caught her attention entirely. "..." Soon enough, she laughed silently. What a fucking joke. They reported the disappearance of the big guy, and only now of the poor janes and joes working there. She shook her head, not minding seeing her handiwork at all, just trying to contain more laughter in general. "Whaddya people watch in this thing even? I have no TV." She crossed her legs, surprisingly lady-like, before taking another sip, that one larger. |
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| Sumitomo | Jan 24 2014, 04:22 AM Post #39 |
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Jimmy regarded her laughter with a kind of bemused curiousness, then shook his head. The half-smirk on his face stayed, however. "You like how they're just now investigating the disappearances now that Nomura's worthless ass is dead? Didn't even get a namedrop for Bunpei. Fuckers." He opened a beer, electing to simply bite off the top. It was a parlor trick Medved had taught him, and it was incredibly handy for when you just don't have a bottle opener handy. And well - Null Phys meant he didn't have to worry about gashing his gums open again. He regarded Mayu crossing his legs (rather primly, odd for her) with some amusement before answering her questions. "What do you mean, you people? We watch all kindsa stuff on the tube." He flipped to one channel. "Here you got your game shows." He flipped the channel as a cute young woman answered a question wrong and was dropped into a vat of whipped cream. "Here's your subtitled american television." A hardboiled detective type broke someone's fingers, and a string of hiragana appeared at the bottom of the screen. Apparently someone needed to 'fucking talk, and do it quick.' He changed the channel. "Late-night anime." Two mean in long capes exchanged over-dramatic phrases, then flew at each other, swords drawn. With a single stroke, both fell, their bellies opened and bleeding into the snow. Jimmy honored their noble deaths by flipping the channel. "News." The Nomura story again. "A lot of it at this time of night is infomercials and that Amazing Commodities show." Jimmy took another pull. "I watch the latter sometimes. Catchy theme song." |
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| Natscookie | Jan 24 2014, 12:51 PM Post #40 |
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"I like how they still don't give a shit." Mayu corrected, biting her lip down so to prevent more laughter. "Fuck the small people, right?" A bit of disdain managed to drip into her voice, but it wasn't overly noticeable. "Have ya been questioned or somethin' yet? I need t'see how this goes, kinda was there after all." It would be very, very bad if they could find something pointing towards Jimmy in the middle of the investigation. Since she wasn't the one getting rid of evidence, she wasn't entirely sure that part was completely covered. Plus, he had been emotional after the fact, which could lead to unintentionally overlooking something. As her partner flipped the channels, Mayu relaxed and leaned back on her seat, and her teeth distractedly nibbled at the glass of the bottle, where she was supposed to place her lips instead, having nothing better to do. In her mind, she decided she'd enjoy this new TV experience for a change. She made a face when the woman fell. Not only had her answer been outright stupid, but public humiliation was just not her thing. It felt like the sort of thing people with no life would watch. Like you? Most other channels seemed okay, with the exception of the anime one. Her eyes almost glinted at the sight with excitement, despite her face remaining rather expressionless. Not that she'd admit it, but she really liked cartoons and things that looked childish in general, rarely ever having gotten to do anything of the sort as a kid. "Amazing Comodities? Whazzat?" |
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