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That Annoying Yellow-Eyed You; okay srsly annoyed now
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Topic Started: Dec 23 2012, 04:13 PM (321 Views)
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The One True Nobody
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Dec 23 2012, 04:13 PM
Post #1
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"...does this clockwork hand follow you... or guide you?"
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- That Annoying Yellow-Eyed You
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Posted By: Almost_Every_One_Of_My_Friends_Has_A_Deep_Dark_Secret_Charles_Is_Almost_The_Normalest Post Date: XXXX-XX-XX
Alright, so, here's the thing: my Shadow's been pestering me, see? That annoying yellow-eyed me who has all the deep dark things floating about my own noodle, and she's been showing up at odd times and taunting me with it all, usually when I'm alone, sober, and bored. I've had to resort to cheap thrills and exorbitant amounts of alcohol just to give myself a guarantee of mental silence for a little while. The thing is, cheap thrills and exorbitant amounts of alcohol are a SHITTY excuse for therapy, and I've got stuff to do that I sort of need to be sober enough to concentrate on, sooooo...
...Any of you fuckers out there had trouble with an annoyingly mouthy Shadow before? If so, please PM me, I need advices, kthxbai.
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Yes
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Dec 23 2012, 04:16 PM
Post #2
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Post By: Hemiptildes Date: XXXX-XX-XX at 2:22
Hi hi~ It's Yuzu-chan~~~
My shadow's a bit of a meanie-butt herself, so maybe we can talk it over~!
Your coping is a no-go, though. You can't drown out your shadow since it's a part of you.
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The One True Nobody
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Dec 23 2012, 04:57 PM
Post #3
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"...does this clockwork hand follow you... or guide you?"
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- RE: That Annoying Yellow-Eyed You
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Posted By: Almost_Every_One_Of_My_Friends_Has_A_Deep_Dark_Secret_Charles_Is_Almost_The_Normalest Post Date: XXXX-XX-XX at 2:45
That'd be great, thanks. If anyone else is inclined to help me out, feel free to drop me a PM as well. I know enough to know that not all Shadows are the same, so what works for one dude or chick might not work for me... so I'll take anything and everything I can get when it comes to ways to possibly deal with this.
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From: Almost_Every_One_Of_My_Friends_Has_A_Deep_Dark_Secret_Charles_Is_Almost_The_Normalest To: Hemiptildes
Hey there, Miss Bad Dude, it's me--Kyo, from school. We met on the roof, when Hiroko was thinking of committing suicide? Thanks for helping with that, by the way. Hiroko and I are really tight, now. And thanks for blasting a random ninja onto the roof just in time to catch us in the middle of that melodrama, it was a fantastic ice-breaker.
I'm aware that my means of "coping" won't work for long, it's just a way to shut the damn thing up long enough to not go insane. I'm in hiding, see? I'm mostly stuck in a motel room and the people I'm staying with have stuff to do and places to be. I could probably guilt-trip my friend into sticking around more often, but she's in a dark enough place herself, I don't want to be the one keeping her from doing her own thing.
And that's sort of one of the big things my Shadow keeps bitching about: my friends. A lot of them have a lot of shit on their minds--I won't go into detail, lot of really heavy secrets and things... the point is, it's got me worried, not just for them but for how I'll feel if things go to shit with any of them and I can't do anything to stop it or help out.
The Shadow keeps saying I'd be better off if they all died. What the fuck kind of sense does that make?! They're like the only good things in my life right now.
I'm trying to make plans to get a job so I can move into an apartment with my boyfriend when this Nutjob Watanabe mess is finally cleaned up, but the damn thing won't stop pestering me about that, either. And I get that much, at least, I mean... I've always hated the idea of getting a job, wasting most of my day on pointless tedious shit, but I'm totally ready to do that if it means getting out of my parents' house and living with Hiroko! My Shadow keeps saying I'll cave once I'm actually doing it, though.
I just want this thing out of my hair so I can think about things calmly and quietly without looking over my shoulder and wondering when the Bitch'll be back with more shit to sling.
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Yes
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Dec 23 2012, 07:51 PM
Post #4
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From: Hemiptildes To: Kyo-chan with the long name
I had fun too that day! I'm glad that you got to know Hirokun better and since I'm not hearing about him getting depressed again, I suppose that I get to thank you for stabilizing him!
It must be scary to have something like that in your head, Kyo-chan. If your friends mean the world to you, then maybe your Shadow is a manifestation of your concern for them. Maybe the Shadow's message is all twisted out of shape, but I think that it's sprung out of your unwillingness to want your friends in pain.
Of course, you don't consciously think that it'd be best if your friends died, I hope. From what I hear about Shadows and what I've seen in my own is that they're usually caricatures of what you're suppressing. I guess that if we're talking in metaphors, the Shadow would be that one nasty voice whispering to you on the inside, but right now it has a loudspeaker.
When did your Shadow first show up? If you know why it popped out, then you know how to kick it back in.
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The One True Nobody
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Dec 23 2012, 08:07 PM
Post #5
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"...does this clockwork hand follow you... or guide you?"
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From: Almost_Every_One_Of_My_Friends_Has_A_Deep_Dark_Secret_Charles_Is_Almost_The_Normalest To: Hemiptildes
Er... well to really explain what I was thinking when the Shadow first showed up I'd have to go into Isoroku's super-secret personal problem deal and I'm kind of just not going to do that because blabbing everyone's deep dark secrets around is kind of bitch-ish. But I think my totally anonymous fake name there is enough of a clue as to how things between me and my incredibly over-complicated social circle stand at the moment.
But yeah now that I think about it I was getting a bit worried about her and feeling like things wouldn't end well when my Shadow appeared. In the bath. While I was in the bath. Damn thing practically tried to do it with me, really creepy shit, and well it was sort of telling me it wanted to go back to the way I was back in the day and the way I was back in the day really sort of sucks.
Like, sleeping around and not caring if the dude I did it with had a girlfriend or was really into me or anything like that, just pick them up play with them and throw them away? That sort of suck. Total fucking bitch. I don't like me back then. My first boyfriend set me straight a long time ago, though. I don't ever want to go back to that because it was really lonely, but this Shadow was all up in my face about how I'd be happier if I did.
A sort of whacked out version of my troubles all screwed up and blown up like a balloon, huh? That might be right. Damn thing tries to get all touchy-feely every time it shows up and I think I know where that symbolism's going.
But how do you "kick it back in?"
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Yes
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Dec 24 2012, 01:24 PM
Post #6
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From: Hemiptildes To: Kyo-chan
I've heard of people rejecting their shadows, but they turn out to be temporary fixes, usually. A more permanent solution comes through trying to come to an understanding with your Shadow. It might be blown completely out of proportion, but there must be something in your shadow that's still "you." They might be downright mean, but I'm sure that there's a lesson to be learned from whatever your Shadow is saying. If you can accept it, then you might be able to ascend. I've never ascended before myself, but Nao-kun did a great job with doing a little miniseries explaining the idea of ascension. From what I know about it, ascension causes your Persona to change.
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The One True Nobody
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Dec 24 2012, 01:42 PM
Post #7
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"...does this clockwork hand follow you... or guide you?"
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From: Almost_Every_One_Of_My_Friends_Has_A_Deep_Dark_Secret_Charles_Is_Almost_The_Normalest To: Hemiptildes
...Er... I don't really see myself coming to an understanding with... THAT... anytime soon. >_>
But... maybe I'm not thinking about this enough.
I know about ascension, but to be honest I'm kind of attached to Morrigan. She's really chill. The thing is, my Persona has a way of slapping me in the face (metaphorically speaking) whenever I'm showing my uglier side, and telling me almost point-blank that I'm doing something that needs changing. I've tried asking Morrigan about my Shadow, but whenever I try she just... stops talking. Like the question shuts her off or something. I don't know, it's weird. She hasn't been talking much in general lately, which is strange by itself, because normally she's pretty chatty.
In a good way. I guess I lucked out. I hear some people's Personas can be a pain in the ass.
I'm not sure what this means or how it relates to anything, but it has me worried. Like my Shadow is the one thing about me that Morrigan doesn't know any better than I do.
...Well, the next time that bitch pops up I'll try to be a bit more rational with it. I'm not sure what'll come of it, though.
Thanks for the advice, Yuzuki, I appreciate it.
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Yes
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Dec 24 2012, 06:52 PM
Post #8
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From: Hemiptildes To: Kyo-chan
Any time! And good luck~! Remember that I'm here for you if you need to talk again.
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The One True Nobody
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Dec 25 2012, 07:22 PM
Post #9
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"...does this clockwork hand follow you... or guide you?"
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From: TheTwoCannedAdrenalineJunkie To: HiddenDragon777
WHOA THERE HOLD UP
I was just in this thread looking for help with my Shadow when someone linked me to this series thingamajigger and what the fuck suddenly that whole Chouko murder-revenge thing that Suzume's on about just bashes me in the face with a sledgehammer!
Um, it... might be a good idea to ask Naoya to take that down. I was there when Suzume awakened, and... well, let me put it this way. This Shadow was hanging onto a lot of stuff, one of the things was a cleaver. Apparently it was Chouko's but the point is, the look on Suzume's face? It was... really ugly. And her Persona doesn't exactly reek of rainbow-happy-fun-times, either.
So... yeah. It's a lead that leads directly to you. It's kinda buried WAY WAY back in the forum but you never know what might happen.
From the sound of it, what went down wasn't exactly murder, but I don't think Suzume will see it that way if she finds out. At least not at first. Anyway, just be careful, yeah?
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UserShadow7989
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Dec 25 2012, 07:53 PM
Post #10
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From: HiddenDragon777 To: TheTwoCannedAdrenalineJunkie
Thanks for the heads up. I tried to contact BlueBird to play damage control, but I think she's firmly convinced she's on the right trail and either ignored or hasn't noticed my response.
I'm not sure she'll look that far back and into a topic that's not obviously directly related to Chouko's passing and I don't want to have the video removed when people having trouble with their personae could be looking for info, but at the same time it is a bit worrying that someone might find it and decide to alert her out of concern.
While we're on the subject, you said you were having trouble with your shadow? Mine's still giving me problems, too, but if you have any questions or advice I wouldn't mind comparing notes.
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