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| Mo Money, Mo Problems | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Sep 21 2017, 01:11 PM (876 Views) | |
| geomease | Oct 28 2017, 06:45 AM Post #16 |
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Fabulous
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Cream quirked an eyebrow at the child’s… forwardness. He was clearly a crazy person, I mean Cream had never destroyed a building before, how could she have destroyed his home both literally and figuratively… also she was pretty sure he wasn’t using the term figuratively right, it was literally the wrong way to figuratively use literate English. Clearly he was a crazy mentally challenged child. Had she been 10 years older, she might have to worry about her ovaries kicking in and her natural maternal instincts driving her on to adopt this poor wayward child. Thankfully she was still full of youth and vigor… also she was pretty sure that statistically speaking if she hadn’t been knocked up by this point she was probably sterile. “Uhhh yeah sure kid…” Cream mumbled, pulling Brycen a few steps away and leaning in to whisper to him. “Pssst, hey Doc Boy, this kid is clearly a crazy person, lets ditch him k.” Cream whispered to Brycen in a conspiratorial tone. She then spun around and addressed the mystery child with a warm well practiced fake smile. “Sure that sounds reasonable. We got some errands to run, really boring adult stuff like taxes and long seminars about timeshares and… other adult things. How about you go back to our house and make yourself comfortable and we’ll meet you there. Our house is at… 1, 2, 3, Fake Street. Yeah that’s the place. Now get out of here you little rascal you and start making yourself at home.” Cream exclaimed, gently but firmly pushing against Shintai’s back until he was out the door and headed in a random direction. Cream gestured to the group to make like a tree and get the fuck outta there while the child was sent on a wild goose chase. Cream and Brycen had managed negotiate an upfront payment for the treasure they brought, and the rest would be paid for upon delivery, so all they needed to do was head back to their ship, drop off their Beli, gather the rest of their loot, drop it off, and start living the high life. Cream was walking with a spring in her step and a tune on her lips as she whistled enthusiastically. “Well that all went better than it normally does for us. Let’s drop the goods off, transport the rest, and then get ready for the cooking completion. I expect to be able to clean house up there.” Cream chirped happily. It was truly rare for things to go so smoothly or the group of hapless criminals and vagabonds. Almost as if the universe were tempting them with promises of an easy job only to oh so cruelly snatch victory away from them at the last minute. The crew made good time back to their ship; they were unimpeded and uninterrupted by the islands forces and even passing by several Marines, both on and off duty. Cream played it cool, waving politely to them when their eyes met and receiving a polite wave back. It looks like the groups disguises were working perfectly, at least for now. They made it back to the docks, Cream taking note of several stands with valuable or rare products to restock the kitchen along the way, and hopped onto the sandy beach of their own personal ‘island’ She felt the sands shift subtly under her boots, Ship was happy to have them back n them, and as they entered the small cave on its surface a hole opened up exposing a set of stair like muscles that led down into the ship. “Honey we’re hoooooome~" Cream called out, delicately tracing her fingers across the fleshy walls which jiggled in appreciation. She took the briefcase the dropped it into the storeroom, locking it and pulling out the duffle bags full of raw treasures they had yet to exchange. She handed them both to Rick, who easily shouldered the heavy bags thanks t his muscular physique. “Alright quick bathroom break and we’re heading right back out everyone, go do your things, get some water, whatever. Once we exchange the goods Rick and Miriel I want you two to start shopping for supplies, we gotta restock our pantry; I have a list for you. I’ll need to prepare for the cooking contest in a bit, so me and Brycen will go there and get settled in, you guys watch from the stands in case something goes wrong. If some shit does go down, you guys might be able to run interference or distraction from the outside.” Cream commanded, resting one hand on her hip and her other pointing outward. The two of them nodded in agreement and went off to freshen up in one of the ships restrooms. Cream went to the fridge, grabbed a beer, and offered one to Brycen, tossing it to him if he wanted one. She then plopped down on a soft fleshy couch and reclined her feet up. A pair of tentacles formed off the couches back and began to knead and massage her neck and shoulders. “Mmmm that’s nice… yours a nice ship.” Cream cooed, biting the cap off her beer bottle and supping from the amber ambrosia inside. Was there anything better in life than getting a massage while you relax after making a mint selling plundered treasures and sipping a victory beer? Cream was fairly sure there wasn’t… unless she was like, also getting a Bee ay at the same time or something, and while temping to ask Rick or Miriel to oblige even they deserved a break from her nonstop libido now and then. The sacrifices she made for her crew. |
![]() Barbara Jean Scoville Brickleberg Wendy Widget Fapple Jack Minerva O'Mally Cream Pye
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| ♦ Gigasheep | Oct 28 2017, 04:11 PM Post #17 |
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Sheepsu
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The doctor listened vacantly. In all honesty, this child was not his problem, it was Cream’s. And by that, well by that he meant she’d let her odd looking snake bite the boy in uncomfortable places, and it just happened to be that the boy believed his manhood to be his own… Well. He pondered that thought for a moment, understanding the boy’s beliefs to some degree. They were the most important part of his anatomy after all and… No, if they ever saw the kid again after today he’d tell him when he was older. For now, time to mock the blonde for getting dragged into another weird mess. “Nah, I like him. He should stick around with us” He mocked a little bit, occasionally glancing at the kid, almost encouraging him to bug Cream for more candy or something akin to that. Besides, if he ended up going along with them, he could easily replace the Clyde that may or may not have fallen into the ocean stored within a vacuum cleaner. Either that or he’d gotten lost somewhere. He didn’t know really, but… He was the least important of the group, apart from keeping morale up by everyone bullying him. A small kid would replace him perfectly, and would probably smell better. “And cooking, can’t forget that. You know, more tasty lollipops. But I’m sure you wouldn’t be interested in that. Run along kiddo, we’ll see you later” He was sure by now the blonde wouldn’t be too happy with him, but it was entertaining to see a small delusional child follow after her, or at least demand that he be allowed to. Taking a nice deep breath, he followed her outside nevertheless, enjoying the nicer air. Something about being in that place put him off a little bit, maybe it was because everyone that worked with money just tended to be… Ugh, well he supposed that guy that had helped them had been nice enough, they’d gotten some money and he’d perhaps made a drinking buddy. The group headed back to Steve, the friendly ship. They had little to no issue getting there, and the marines didn’t even bat an eyelid. Something felt… Wrong. He shrugged it off, they had both the best and worst luck, so even if it did go wrong he imagined they could probably just escape. Like… Oh who knew, maybe 123 Fake Street was actually a place around here, that’d just be embarrassing, for Cream alone of course. He still kind of needed revenge on the girl for the pains and snide comments she’d caused him before, including his first ever bounty. That, and she was the type of person he found entertaining to watch suffer, only slightly. He wasn’t into that weird stuff. Though, he had an inkling she was. As they headed down Steve’s internal stairs, Wrycen simply watched as the blonde interacted with the huge being, as if it actually cared for her. He understood the bond between man and dog, but man and tentacle monster… He had that feeling he was in it for the food and she was in it for the implications. He waited for her to be done in the storeroom, briefly listening to her plan before heading back to his room. Stick with her whilst she did some cooking, and he could just… Sample some food and laugh at those that burnt theirs or ruined it. Now he thought about it, he had the perfect plan. Oh yes, he’d be that judgemental guy that made people mess up, or even better… He would apply to be the judge! Hahaha, perfect. Briefly, the man sat around in his room, picking up one of his magazines from behind his desk and flicking through it for a little while. He sighed a little bit, not really amused by anything within and so headed to the kitchen. As he got there, he noticed the blonde digging around in the fridge, nodded to himself briefly and then caught the beer as it was thrown to him. He cracked it open with his hand, taking a sip and smirking to himself. It was cool and refreshing, just as he liked it. “So, that was successful. I believe my expertise showed there, calling you in at just the right time. I’m sure you could have come up with a better story than… Well you know, but I guess it worked out in the end. Manipulate the buyer and all” He took another sip, encouraging the blonde to move her legs so he could join her on the sofa. She could always put them up on his lap if she really wanted but he wasn’t bothered. If she didn’t move he’d just dump himself down on them anyway, she’d soon get the idea. And if not… Well then she was going to have to deal with his butt on her legs. “Not quite what I meant about finally having that drink though. I was thinking a little more… Special than a cold one. Not that I’m complaining, good stuff it is” He huffed to himself, taking another big gulp. The cold goodness ran down his throat, cooling him down and causing a few goosebumps to form across his arms, and shiver down his spine. That was the good stuff. Now all he needed was… Well, what did he need? He wasn’t really, well he wasn’t really sure what he needed these days. Just pure instinctive gratification he supposed, like… Some good food, some good companionship and some real good sleep. Yeah that sounded about right. “How’ve you been holding up lately? Feels like you’ve been a little… Ugh what’s that word. Dishonest I guess. Dishonest with yourself. Guess it takes getting eaten by an island to really bring out the real you? Or maybe I’m reading it wrong” He continued, practically musing by this point. A part of him cared, a part of him was in the middle about it all. Still, he couldn’t go sailing around with someone that lived their life upset. He knew the feeling of sadness, he could relate. It’d do her good to get it all out. He realised this was becoming more and more like a counselling session though. |
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| Shintai Hakai | Nov 5 2017, 05:38 PM Post #18 |
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The Worst Generation
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Shintai looked up at the pedophile doctor and Cream, blinking his eyes and waiting for their response. Sadly, cream turned him right around and gently nudged him in the opposite direction, telling him that they were going to go do boring adult things. Shintai sighed as he was forced out the door, and shrunk his body down, using his gloves to zip above the doorway and just gently sit there for a little bit. "And then they lie to my face... what nerds." Shintai said, closing his eyes. "Well, on the bright side -- I don't care what they tell me, I'll just do what I want." Shintai said, letting out a chuckle and standing up. Shintai then realized, wait a damn second! The pedophile doctor tried to get him to stick with the group inside! Shintai slapped his cheeks "He wanted to get in on this "underagelooking" action! That creep!" Shintai yelled out to himself. Shintai looked down and waited for one of the people to step out of the building, and then dropped himself down, hopefully landing on one of Cream's lackeys. Shintai would sit and gently hold onto what was likely their pants, maybe chilling in a pocket, and just chill out for the ride. Once inside the belly of the beast, Shintai climbed out, landing onto the floor and walking off around the inside. Shintai would go all around the ship/island/livingcreature and basically yell out "Now this is a story all about how my life got flip turned upside down.". Shintai let out a chuckle and sat down somewhere in the gigantic ship, turning his head up to the roof and letting out his amazing rap. "And I'd like to take a minute Just sit right there, I'll tell you how I became the prince of a ship called... I don't know, Jim or something. On mouse island born and raisedin the jungle was where I spent most of my days. Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool, And all huntin' some snake dude outside of my hole. When a couple of humans who were up to no good. Started making trouble in my neighborhood. I got in one little fight and my mom got scared. She said 'You're movin' with your pedophile uncle and bimbo aunt in Ben'. I begged and pleaded with her day after day, But she packed my hobo bundle and sent me on my way. She gave me a kiss and then she gave me my ticket. I put my fencing swords on and said, 'I might as well kick it'. First class, yo this is bad. Drinking orange juice out of a champagne glass. Is this what the people of Steve living like? Hmmmmm this might be alright. But wait I hear they're prissy, bourgeois, all that. Is this the type of place that they just send this cool cat? I don't think so, I'll see when I get there. I hope they're prepared for the prince of Juan. Well, the plane landed and when I came out, There was a dude who looked like a doc' standing there with my name out. I ain't trying to get molested yet, I just got here. I sprang with the quickness like lightning, disappeared. I whistled for a ride and when it came near, The inside said fresh and it had dice in the mirror. If anything I could say that this ship was rare, But I thought 'Nah, forget it' - 'Yo, homes to Steve'I pulled up to the Ship about 7 or 8, And I yelled to the guy 'Yo homes smell ya later'. I looked at my kingdom, I was finally there. To sit on my throne as the Prince of Steve" Shintai finished. [Feel free to not put that toward SD But I'm a lazy piece of shit and its what I wanted.] |
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dont stretch the page A piece of benevolence, a shard of good will is sometimes all that is needed to raise a truly loyal army. Shintai the Mouse Boy We judge everyone by the sum of their actions -- not the cards they're dealt. Kaiji Suki No man can stand before me and not quake with fear. The God Lobster | |
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| geomease | Nov 12 2017, 07:56 AM Post #19 |
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Fabulous
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Cream pulled her legs back, allowing Brycen to plop down next to her before swiveling them across and laying them across his lap, playfully poking him in the stomach with her toes and flashing him a warm smile. For all the razzing she gave him, she did feel that distinctive sibling bond with him, maybe it was because he was so hopeless, maybe it was because he seemed to genuinely care for her safety and mental/physical well being, or maybe it was because she grew up with 5 sisters, now possibly none, and she missed the feeling of having a family. Either way she enjoyed the stability the man brought. “Eeehhh we’ll have plenty of time for insanely expensive champagne and wines later when we’re spending all our fat stacks of cash. Besides, we don’t wanna become snobbish with all this money, a nice cheap beer every now and again will help us grounded, remember where we came from.” Cream added, chugging another half of her dirty cheap beer that tasted of ass and regret and relaxing into the couched under the gentle ministrations of Steve the ship. Her relaxing time would be interrupted however by a sudden feeling of movement in her chest. Her face turned red, as she felt something small wiggling about between her bosom, then finally something burst out from between her chest pillows, landed on the ground, and started singing and dancing around. “FUCK IT’S THAT MOUSE AGAIN, KILL IT, KILL IT NOW!” Cream shrieked, jumping up 10 feet and standing on the couch as if it would infect her with some horrible disease. She cocked her arm back to hurl the closest thing in hand at it, noticed that her arm was holding the remains of her beer, quickly chugged the last of it, then hurled the bottle at the tiny singing and dancing form of Shintai. She missed the mark, the piece of glass hitting the soft ground and bouncing away harmlessly, to be picked up by a cleaner shrimp the size of a Labrador and carried off to who knows where those things took garbage. Cream retrieved a large glass bowl and dove for Shintai, aiming to slam it down on top of him and hold the vile singing dancing mouse under the glass dome so it couldn’t get away. “AHA!! I got you now you sneaky little bastard! How do you like the taste of Justice Pye!” She shouted, in a manner she felt sounded like a badass one liner from an action movie. She didn’t bother to look down, secure in the knowledge she had flawlessly taken out the mouse. “TROUSER! Get out here and eat this mouse boy, and this time actually eat the mouse, don’t just bite a child’s wiener ok!” Cream ordered. The head of trouser popped out of her bag and he flicked his tongue through the air, obeying and slithering over to Cream and the hypothetically trapped mouse boy to feed the small rodent to her snake. Rick and Miriel ran into the room, hearing the commotion and figuring they’ need to calm Cream down about something, only to see her perched on top of an upside down glass bowl, a maniacal look in her eyes as she gestured for her snake to slither forward and do something likely unpleasant to the contents trapped underneath the bowl. “R-Rick?” Rick asked, Miriel rolled her eyes at his redundant question. “Yeas, what is going on in here?” Miriel asked, Cream gave her a manic smile. “There was a fucking mouse in my chest, scared the shit out of me but I got the little bastard now, Trouser get ready to gobble this little turn up ok!” Cream ordered, preparing to lift the bowl and reveal its tasty contents to her pet Trouser snake. |
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| ♦ Gigasheep | Nov 12 2017, 10:31 AM Post #20 |
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Sheepsu
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The doctor found nothing wrong with their seating arrangement, as he listened to the blonde speaking the truth. The expensive stuff could come later, and again, going back to roots was something that he could appreciate. Back in the old days of being in debt because of his doctor’s degree. Actually… Wasn’t he meant to pay that money back? Oh well, they were rich now, they could come for him if they wanted there was no way that he couldn’t pay it back and then some with everything they’d gathered. Anyway, from where they came from… Yeah. Just as he was sure the blonde would open up though, instead her top did, revealing that small mouse from before, making annoying noises and running around the ground. He sneered a little bit as she turned red, before it dawned on him… He’d never seen Cream blush before, she was usually up for anything after all. Weird, but somehow kind of nice. Even cute- Before he could finish his thought train a foot came crashing into his face, as he’d forgotten about her legs being across his and therefore making him susceptible to… Well, that. "Ow" The doctor held the side of his face, sighing and watching as Cream began to swing with her can, missing completely as only a mildly intoxicated girl such as her could do. But then she managed something actually useful, grabbing a bowl and slamming it down on the poor creature, trapping it within a glass oxygen-less dome for it to suffocate, or as he found out a moment later: Get eaten by that odd looking snake. Finishing up his can he crumpled it in his hand, throwing it jokingly at the back of the blonde’s head. “Leave it alone, it’s got good taste” He chuckled to himself, only half meaning it. He hadn’t seen this snake do much more than be used as a mace to smack people with, so the thought of it finally being useful and eating a rodent could be interesting. Watching animals fight as it was… He was sure that was a sport, though not technically legal. Eh, he was a doctor not a marine, he could deal without knowing the technicalities. As he looked at the creature, he had the feeling it had a sort of odd anatomy though… And now he thought about it, mice didn’t tend to be that colour either. He shrugged the thought off. “Yeah… Get him Trouser” He chuckled to himself, only now remembering he’d just had all his beer so he could throw it at the blonde, and therefore had no more to sarcastically drink. He sighed a little, throwing his legs over the sofa in a similar way to Cream before, laying back and watching as the action took place. Miriel and Rick had walked into the room, and Steve seemed a little uncertain as to what to do, but Brycen… Oh he had a plan alright. Reaching into his pocket he retrieved an elastic band, and with his unsuspecting victim currently holding down a glass, it was the perfect shot. Sticking the band to his thumb, and pulling it back with his other hands forefinger, he released it, aiming for her lower back, or… A little lower than there actually, the centre of her butt to be precise. This couldn’t go wrong at all. |
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| geomease | Nov 17 2017, 11:59 AM Post #21 |
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Fabulous
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Cream was almost manic in her expression as she waited for Trouser to close in on the vile mouse that had smuggled its way into the ship between her natural pockets. How dare he, he wasn’t a handsome man, a beautiful woman, or a passable Okama, only any combination of those three were allowed to shove their hands down her shirt… with requirements admittedly becoming more lax the more intoxicated she was… but that was besides the point. She felt a dull thud against the back of her head and shot Doc Boy a death glare, though more in the way an angry sibling might. “No way, this mouse boy illegally touched my chesticles. Alright Trouser, I’m gonna open the glass dome, and you eat the mouth boy, ready? Three… two… onwwwwaaagghhh!!!” Creams shouted, suddenly yelping and jumping up, knocking over the glass bowl and letting the mousy intruder escape in the confusion. There was a sharp stinging sensation in between her ass crack, that damn Doc Boy’s aim was true! “Doc Boy you little shit, come here!” Cream shouted forgetting all about the mouse for the moment and leaping at Brycen, aiming to tackle him and start lightly kicking and punching at him, again in the way wrestling siblings would do. Though she didn’t seem to notice or care about the fact that he didn’t think of her as much a sibling she she did him… and she was pressing up an awful lot of her against him in their ‘fight’. Miriel gave a weary sigh, and Rick mimicked her as well. “Just once it would be nice to have a nice, quiet, normal day…” Miriel lamented, Rick nodding and speaking his name in agreement. Cream rolled around the floor with Brycen for a moment before she formed up a nasty concoction in her hand. A special ‘candy’ that was far to bitter, far to sour, far too salty, and far too spicy to be enjoyable formed in her hand, and she shoved the hard ball of candy into the man’s mouth, and did her best to hold his mouth closed so he’d be forced to keep sucking on it or swallow it. “Eat it, suck on my salty balls you little turd!!” Cream shouted, aiming to hold down the man, who was actually surprisingly strong when he actually tried to fight back. Miriel and Rick just shrugged and walked off, Trouser, confused and not willing to get into another fight, slithered off to leave the 2 of them to their brawling. Eventually, whether through being overpowered or simple overconfidence Cream ended up being the one on the bottom and the victim of whatever terrible torture that Brycen could manage against her. The 2 would go back and forth for while until they wore themselves out and Cream rolled over onto her back banking, red faced, and disheveled. “Whew… that was… kinda fun. Even my old sisters never really got to have that kind of physical playtime with me when I was younger. You make a great replacement sister you know that.” Cream teased, rolling onto her side and poking Brycen in the cheek with her finger a few times. She jumped to her feet and scurried off to her bathroom to freshen up; she had to look presentable again. Awhile later she was ready, and Rick and Miriel were prepared to do their part. She handed the 2 of them the briefcases, so that they could deliver them and retrieve the rest of the payment. Once that was done they’d return to the ship, drop it off, and go shopping while Cream and Brycen prepared for their cooking contest. They had to slip back into their characters, Cream resuming her Role as Jessica and Brycen taking back on the mantle of Wrycen Batts, ever the clever moniker. The two of the made their way into the staging area where they could hang out with the other contestants before the thing officially started. It would also allow them both to scope out the competition. Cream scanned the area to see who she’d be up against, there were a number of well known chefs here… as well as a few Marines entering the contest as well, that was a little nerve wracking. “Just play it cool doc boy, the fuzz won’t see through our disguises.” Cream commented, mind over matter. In the distance of course, one particularly shrewd Marine was looking at the sitting du and scratching his chin, where had he seen them before? |
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| ♦ Gigasheep | Nov 18 2017, 07:20 AM Post #22 |
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Sheepsu
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The doctor couldn’t help but grin as his super special attack struck exactly where he’d aimed. What he hadn’t thought about though was the reaction which the blonde would give, which happened to be a bodyslam of sorts, as she dived onto him whilst he’d remained laid down. He yelped, but there was nothing he could do with how much quicker she was than him, as she proceeded to wail on him akin to how a sibling might. Just the thought of that made him ill… Not siblings, certainly not siblings. “It was a joke, it was a joke” He choked out as she proceeded to punch him, whilst his own hands almost acted on their own, holding her back as much as possible without much care for gentleness anymore. Though he wasn’t particularly strong like this, he could still just about hold off her assault, or at least until Cream decided to drop something into his mouth. He was usually ok with most foods, even the spicier foods out there, but as soon as it hit his mouth he almost hurled, the taste… Texture… Strength, it was too much. His eyes streamed as it reluctantly went down the back of his throat, leaving a boiling pain in its wake akin to a person on fire rolling down a hill and setting fire to everything on its way. “Agghh” He choked, a sudden surge of strength flowing through him, with what he was sure was a flash of red. Were his powers returning in this time of need? As soon as the two hit the squishy floor, he realised this wasn’t the case as although he had the high ground, surprisingly he hadn’t won, his hands fighting off hers and his head reared back to avoid any swipes from her nails or something. Still, with vantage point came some form of power, and as soon as she tried to move in for another attack his hands flew down to under her armpits, attempting to tickle her excessively. This only lasted briefly before he was flung to the side again. Eventually the two were laid on their backs, breathing heavily after their playfight of sorts. ‘Play’ might have been the wrong word in some cases though, as he had various shallow scrapes across his body, and red marks from punches and slaps. Cream wasn’t overly strong, but she was persistent and resourceful. Suddenly she came out with the phrase he’d hoped not to hear, ‘sister’. Not even brother! Come on! Did she have no concept of his gender, sexuality or… Anything really? He sighed, only just about noticing the poke she gave him before she up and disappeared. “My mouth still stings…” He complained vacantly, remaining unmoving on the floor until finally the blonde returned. With a sigh, he rose up to his feet and followed behind them, more exhausted than he’d been before. It didn’t take long for them to have left the ship and to end up at the competition, which was fairly handy. If they did get in trouble like Cream seemed to feel like they might, at least he could run for safety. Wrycen ran his fingers through his blue hair, feeling a little odd right now. His energy seemed at a weird state, as if he both had tonnes of it, and none at all. Perhaps his powers were returning to him, that’d be nice. All it required was a life threatening situation, such as a small angry girl screaming at him and trying to kick the crap out of him. He… Decided against planning any future experiments on that. “We’re fine, they’re dumb as anything” He smirked, before beginning to merge with the crowds. He’d already come up with his master plan earlier, and now all he had to do was push his way towards the judging panel and find his way onto it. Of course to start off with he’d have to either convince them to let him join, or… Remove one of them from the picture. Perhaps he’d even do both if he had to. Still, he didn’t doubt Cream’s cooking ability, more he just wanted to eat a variety of nice foods and have a relaxed day. Soon he found himself at the judging panel, and began to look over those that presumably would be grading the dishes… |
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| geomease | Nov 21 2017, 11:29 AM Post #23 |
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Fabulous
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Cream took her time surveying the crowd of people gathered for the contest, within the cooking world there were a lot of big names here. There was Gwendolyn “Smug Face” Wendolyn, the woman universally hated for her condescending attitude towards other chefs. The underhanded cooking brothers Whimpy “The Cuck” Johnson and Bargler “The Ham” Jackson, both well known for winning cooking duels by sabotaging their adversaries dishes and stealing their cooking techniques. There was the unnerving Grimace, no one has ever seen what lay beneath that purple gumdrop costume of his, and some say the knowledge of what horrors lie beneath would drive a man mad. There was Ron “The Don” Donald, the unofficial godfather of the burger market. There was Maxine “The Kid" Vid, she was young, a mere 16 years old but had her finger on the pulse of future cooking, they say she could flash cook a roast with her patented “Microwave” oven in under 15 minutes, her speedy cooking processes able to cook circles around her foes. There was D’Arby, master of roast beef, rumor has it he could cut slices as thin as 1 mm and still keep the full flavor of his beef, and finally there was General “Kentucky” Sanders, whose mastery over chicken was without peer. “Jeeze, there is some top notch competition here Wyrcen, I’m actually gonna have to be at the top of my game, especially if they end up choosing dishes that suit their specialties. If we get a dessert theme I pretty much have this in the bag, but anything else is gonna be tough.” Cream commented, the rest of the completion was scoping each other out as well. Many of them were rivals and quite familiar with each other, Cream however was fresh meat, and the Underhanded Brothers and Gwendolyn were eyeing the newcomer, eager to get a piece of the competition first. Gwen beat the brothers to the punch and made their way to her first. “Sup, you must be new to the circuit, I haven’t seen you before. The names Gwendolyn, nice to meet you~” She greatly with a forced fake smile that was just barely containing her smugness. Cream ran her fingers through her hair and casually flicked a stray strand out of her eyes and extended a hand to shake back. The two gave each other a firm handshake for a minute, their arms tensing as they gave each other a good firm shake. “Yeah, I’ve like, totally heard of you, yo got like, a nasty rep ain’t cha, you’ll go easy on a newbie like me right?” Cream replied with equal amounts of fake smiles and camaraderie. Gwen wasn’t buying it anymore than Cream was, but this was about psychological warfare at this point, they kept up the act for the simple matter of keeping up the act. “Of course not, those rumor are obviously exaggerated by those without the skills to keep up, not you though, you’ve got some chops I can tell. But cooking on the stage is nothing like cooking in the kitchen, I hope you don’t choke out there, aaaalll those people watching you, like hungry wolves ready to pounce at the first sight of weakness. It can be pretty nerve racking, especially since the judges tend to harshly critique showmanship as well as actual ability, but I’m sure you can handle it. You look like you’re used to getting messy on camera.” Gwen added, chuckling to herself at the little snide remark about the fact Cream tended to look like someone who worked in the adult film industry. Cream wanted to snap back about how it was actually a lot of hard work to star in those movies, and that it took an insane amount of physical endurance and exercise to hold those poses for hours on end during shoots… but managed to restrain herself enough, she never got the chance to counter the verbal jab as Gwen saw herself out. “Well I have to go prepare, good luck out there newbie, you’re going to need it.” Gwen chuckled, letting slip her patented smug face as she sauntered off. Cream silently fumed, the girls attitude having managed to get under her skin. Damn she was good at that; hopefully that was all bluster to compensate for her poor cooking skills, but somehow Cream doubted it. The Underhanded Brothers made their way over next; Cream felt her skin crawl as they approached. One of them just reeked of being sneaky, were those actual prison stripes? The other just looked… sad. Fat, weary, greasy, it hurt to just look at him. The Ham made his way to Cream, while Whimpy stood in between Wyrcen and Cream, slowly invading their personal space with his offensive girth and body odor and inching forward to separate the two. “Heya toots, names Bargler, nice ta meetcha. Always a welcome relief ta get sum classy dames around here, not like that hussy Gwen. Saw her talkin ta ya, pay that skank no mind, she’s just tryin ta get under yer skin.” The Bargler reassured, he was by design, far more charming and handsome by comparison to Whimpy, who was currently wanting from the brisk walk and wiping his sweaty brow, a few stray drops threating to hit Doc Boy. “OOhhh boooy, I’m beat. Saaaay there buddy, you don’t happen to have any spare change do you? I reeeally want to get a burger but I left my wallet back at my hotel, come ooon, help a brother out. I’ll gladly pay you Next Thursday for a Hamburger today” Whipy whined in a low pitch sad tone, going so far as to sling his arm over Doc Boy’s shoulder and lean his considerable weight against him, patting his shoulder like they were old friends, it was like the man bathed in sweat and grease. “Say, you look pretty new to this kinda thing, tell ya what toots, since I’m an old pro, I’ll give ya some top dollar advice, free o charge even. I heard it from a god source that the theme of the day is gonna be vegetables. The way these things work is that we gather our ingredients first, THEN they announce the theme. Most chefs gather up a wide variety and then make do with what they have but if you get enough good stuff from the start, and they call the right theme, you got some eeeasy money. That’s a free insider tip fer ya dollface.” Bargler explained, Cream naturally didn’t trust him for a second, but then again… what if he was telling the truth? Could she take that risk, vegetables were her worst subject in the world of cooking, it might be a good idea to stock up on the best ingredients just in case. “Errr… thanks…” She stammered out awkwardly. The 2 of them weren’t leaving, continuing to leer at and hover around the two of them. Whimpy huff and Brycen would feel his hand reach around and give a little squeeze at his abdomen. “Ohh hey buddy, do you work out? You must be in good shape huh? Care to give me some tips, I just can’t seem to lose the weight, feel that.” Whimpy exclaimed, pressing his bulging belly against Brycen in the most uncomfortable way possible. Bargler was now leaning into Cream, a playboy smile on his face. “You know toots, one of my specialties is actually salads, how bout after the competition we head back to my place and I’ll toss yours? I’ve got a nice big carrot you might enjoy as well. What do ya say doll face?” He proposed, bracing his arm against the wall and leaning over her in a looming fashion. Cream felt like she was about to lose her lunch, but couldn’t exactly just clock him without being thrown out of the competition, wait, was that what he wanted? “Yeah, you look like you could use a real partner, this guy here, he ain’t no good for you, guy looks like a total whimp, why don’t you ditch that zero and get wit da hero. I’ll even let you handle my salami if yer nice and obedient.” Bargler continued, laying it on in increasingly offensive pick up lines, Cream felt her blood boiling, and her face flushing with red, oh this guy was a scumbag alright, and the urge to clock him was growing. Whimpy wasn’t letting up either, leaning into Brycen, occasionally ‘accidentally’ groping him and covering him in sweat and his stench. The Enemies
Edited by geomease, Nov 21 2017, 11:35 AM.
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| ♦ Gigasheep | Nov 21 2017, 03:20 PM Post #24 |
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Unfortunately for the scheming doctor, Wrycen’s attempts to get a better look at the judging panel was quickly interrupted a succession of weird characters. First came the rather odd female apparently known as Gwendolyn, who after a brief conversation with Cream made clear that she was just going to be incredibly smug the entire time. In fact, he himself even found himself being outsmugged, which just wouldn’t do. Brycen, he wasn’t the smug type. Wrycen though… Oh, that was a completely different box of frogs! Before he could get up in her face about things, the girl would be replaced by two other weird individuals. One introduced himself as Bargler, the other didn’t even bother introducing himself. Instead, he decided to almost hug the doctor, his large arm wrapping around him as it sounded like he was trying to extort money out of the man. All he could manage was a sneer, oh, now he was in his element. “Do I know you? Because you’re not looking familiar to me. What’s your name?” He started off slowly, acting not aggressively, but certainly not friendly to the overly large man. Either he was about to try and rob the doctor, or he was trying to psyche him out. Thankfully there were two things the man didn’t seem to realise. Firstly, the only thing in his accessible pockets were a single scalpel, one he’d grabbed from his room in case he needed to defend himself. He didn’t have his full power right now, but he could probably still perform a quick liposuction to the large man. As for the second… He wasn’t even part of the competition! The large man still continued to speak however, invading his personal space and making him feel… Uncomfortable. He’d persevere though. “I just know what to eat and what not to. If you really wanted to lose weight, somehow I don’t think a burger is going to help now is it buddy?” He grinned, perhaps it would bother the large man, perhaps not. He could hear the other man chipping in now though, and just from a few looks he could tell Cream wasn’t exactly comfortable right now either. But perhaps she was forgetting just one thing. These creeps… These pathetic attempts at gross abominations of humanity, they were nothing. In fact, they were less than nothing. Hell, they could never beat the one and only… Clyde Fingle. If the two had dealt with him their whole time on the seas, these two were nothing. “Jessica, how about we go get you ready for the competition. The suckers ain’t got nothing, and for some reason they’re trying to psyche me out. We’ll see how that works out. Besides, they’ve got nothing on Boat-Bitch, am I right?” He attempted to get the blonde to remember their old crew mate, who presumably was stuck in a small container either in the depths of the ship or at the bottom of the sea. He made sure not to refer to him as his actual name to avoid suspicion, and instead his crew nickname. From there, the doctor attempted to free himself from the large man, prodding him in the stomach and then began to wriggle free, with help from the grease. Honestly, he was grossed out by this man, but he had dealt with worse as mentioned before. “And anyway, what kind of hero goes around looking like that? Not only that... But I think you’ve got a little dirt right there” The doctor sneered, pointing down at the Barger’s tie. If he were to look down, he’d soon have the doctor gone merchant gone hopeful judge booping him on the nose, a schoolyard prank! Whether it worked or not, he attempted to drag Cream along with him away from these guys, laughing loudly to let everyone know he’d just shown these guys up, even if he hadn’t, and even if they wanted round two. If it worked though… Well he’d be feeling mighty proud of himself that was for sure. |
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| geomease | Nov 27 2017, 10:55 AM Post #25 |
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Cream felt her blood beginning to boil, how dare they! It was bad enough that this Bargler was laying down shitty pick up lines on her (Seriously, she could make better food related innuendo in her sleep!) but now they were insulting the masculinity of Brycen! Now normally, Cream insulted the masculinity of Doc Boy all the time, it was kinda her shtick, but for some unfathomable reason, this irked her. I mean obviously she’d never slept with him, he couldn’t exactly compare to the human Adonis that was Rune Guy, but she felt a sudden need to defend her ma- I mean her brotherly figure… yeah that’s it. Only SHE was allowed to insult Brycen’s masculinity! “Hah! Yeah totally, these jokers aren’t half as bad as old Boat Bitch was. Let’s get out of here Wrycen, wouldn’t want the stink of these washed up has been’s to cling to us. Besides, Wrycen here is 10 times the man you’ll EVER be.” Cream chuckled, standing up and sauntering off with Brycen, actually hooking her arm around his as they departed and giving the bumbling duo a parting sight of her fine fanny swishing back and forth as they left them in the dust. Cream let out a sigh of relief, leaning over and briefly hugging Brycen’s arm. He was always good at centering her when she was about to lose her cool. “Hey… thanks, was about to clobber those jerks… they were even worse than that Gwendolyn.” Cream thanked him, offering him a sincere smile. When he responded, she couldn’t explain why her heartbeat suddenly seemed to quicken. Maybe she was just… full of righteous indignation! Yeah that’s it, pure adrenaline after dealing with those shmucks, she’ calm down in a minute or two… better let go of Brycen’s arm as well… it’s completely unrelated obviously, he was just getting clingy is all and definitely not the other way around at all! “Ahem… so… we should start thinking of a strategy, the others are probably gonna try and shake us up as well, maybe we should go on the counter offensive, see if we can throw the rest of the competition off their game. Just be sure to not do anything that would interfere with their prep processes so we don’t get thrown out, distractions and ambiguous taunting… maybe a little sabotage if we can get away with it.” Cream added, releasing her hold on Brycen’s arm and looking away to try and hide the sudden redness in her cheeks, clearly from the heat, its… it’s so hot, yeah, the temperature was hot, just the temperature, definitely not any non sibling relating feelings she had! The two quickly split up, each focusing on trying to distract another member of the competition. Cream zero’d in on the guy in the purple gumdrop suit. He was standing over a table, glaring down at a briefcase. Cream slipped over and stopped in front of the table and flashed him a knowing smirk. “Hey there, I’ve never seen a living gumdrop befo-” Cream began before an audible snap rung through the air as the Grimaces head jerked up and leveled at her. “…” The Grimace glared at her, his expression half vacant half irritate scowl, he said nothing, just stared. “Uhhh y-yeah, like I was saying you look like-” she tried to continue, but his glare remained on her as unnerving as ever. “…” The Grimace continued to glare, his expression unmoving “Look like… you’re a very important and busy individual and I’ll just be going now.” Cream stammered, sweat beginning to run down her brow as she turned heel and scampered off. That guy was crazy scary, no way she was risking having her soul ripped out and shoved into that briefcase of his, time to pick an easier target. Hmmm, that guy there, D’Arby, he was a handsome gent. She’d switch up her strategy this time. Throw him off with a bit of flirting, and if they went against each other in the matches make flirty eyes with him to throw off his timing. Cream sauntered over to him; he was busy looking over several pre wrapped roasts tied up with string nets. She leaned over the counter and looked at the cuts as well. “Oh my, now THAT is a mighty fine cut.” She purred, drawing the man’s attention, he looked up to see her leaning over the meat counter; the angle she was at gave him a good view down the top of her shirt. He gulped nervously, feeling his heartbeat quicken. “And the meat doesn’t look too bad either~” She followed up, looking up to the man and flashing him a hungry looking grin. Yup, his heartbeat was definitely quickening. He quickly collected himself and tipped his hat to her. Cream giggled and extended her hand to shake his. “The names Jessica, Jessica Goldenrod, pleased to meet you.” Cream greeted, remembering to stay in character. D’Arby had gotten over his initial shock, and gave her a gentlemanly smile. He gently but firmly took her hand by the palm, raised it up, bent over, and kissed the back of her hand. That caught Cream off guard, ok, this guy was a regular Casanova, this wasn’t gonna be as easy as she thought as he seemed well versed in seduction tactics as well, crap. “No no, the pleasure is all mine ma’am. The name is D’Arby, and I must say, you certainly seem to know your beef, tell me, do you have any particular preference?” D’Arby asked coolly, taking the initiative and putting Cream on the defensive. She had to come up with a quick counter, return the momentum to her side and keep him off guard. She smiled and gave a polite giggle, buying her a few precious seconds to come up with a plan of attack. “Ohh, I love it all, but I do have a particular fondness for thicker cuts, as well as a nice,” Cream paused and tilted to the side, her gaze quick obviously scanning what she could of the man’s butt. “Rump Roast. How about you D’Arby, you seemed to be studying the selection closely when I arrived, do you like what you see?” Cream replied with a playful smile, leaning forward on the counter, bracing herself with her hands and keeping the close together, giving the effect of pushing up her amble bosom to entice the man. He raised an eyebrow, trying to play it cool but his eyes they did wander down yonder to those perky peaks and voluptuous valleys. “Mmm, I have to admit I do, while Roast Beef is my mainstay, I’ve been branching out, chicken has some rather enticing forms you know. A nice set of thighs, some plump breasts, there’s a whole lot of fun things I’d like to try out with chicken. You look pretty well versed in that area, how would you like to run some hands on culinary experiments with me in that regard.” D’Arby replied, giving Cream a million dollar smile. Okay, this guy was VERY good. Cream was lucky the table was between them so he couldn’t see her knees wobbling slightly; she made sure to keep herself steady with the table. Crap maybe she had underestimated his charm and overestimated her ability to keep her own libido in check. She had to at least break even, any longer and she’d end up screwing herself over by screwing him over. “That sounds like fun, but only if you let me handle some of your select cuts myself. Here’s my number, gimme a call when this is all over and we’ll arrange for some time in the kitchen okay?” Cream exclaimed, passing him one of many pre written den den numbers and turning on her heels and sashaying away from him. She could eel his eyes undressing her as she swayed her hips back and forth. Oh be still my thundering heart… Well worst case scenario she lost the battle but won the war with that 10 gallon stud, grrooowwwlll~ |
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| ♦ Gigasheep | Nov 28 2017, 09:43 AM Post #26 |
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As the two walked away, the doctor couldn’t help but turn and poke his tongue out at them, leaving them dumbfounded as to what had just happened. In actual fact, they’d been defeated by the charm and wit as the one and only Wrycen, who was totally getting good at this. He couldn’t say he minded Cream attaching herself to his arm either, there was something pleasant about it… Maybe he was overthinking things, but it was almost nostalgic. When would Rune-Guy come back though… He was really needed to be honest. “Don’t mention it. I’m sure we have a friend that might deal with them eventually too” He grinned, referencing the elusive hero that he’d been thinking about. What Cream might see as just a simple disappearing act with an impressive hiding ability, he saw as a constant struggle to reawaken his true powers. Sighing a little bit, Wrycen continued to listen to what the blonde spoke about, in particular messing with the other contestants. For now his chance at being a judge had probably been blown out the water, but screwing around with other contestants… He could certainly do that. He’d ruin their day for sure! “I think I’ve got a plan” The doctor soon split from Cream in search or other contestants. They weren’t too difficult to find as they tended to be the ones stood around tables, preparing their utensils and various plans they had. Or at least that’s what he assumed it was, he tended to burn most things he cooked so he was completely out of his element right about now. One individual stuck out to him. No it wasn’t the weird plum boy in the corner, or the weird clown. It was in fact the older man. The elderly were regrettably very easy to trick or pick on, many of them tending to need some sort of help around the place. This guy looked just like that! “Oh excuse me sir. Are you hoping to take part in this contest?” The man looked up, passion burning in his eyes. Oh, Brycen was about to feel terrible for what he had planned, but at the same time… He didn’t care. All was fair in love and war, and with how Cream was in the kitchen this would most likely be both. Or at least that’s how it sounded from his room from presumably the kitchen. This man didn’t even look that old… But stress could add years, and being a doctor he knew all about stress. “Ah yes. Are you competing too?” Not quite… But he didn’t know that. Playing his role as best he could, the doctor looked him up and down, acting surprised for a second before smiling and playing as ‘kind’ as he could. His hands were out as if he were making sure the ‘elderly’ man didn’t topple over, and he spoke in such a careful tone when he next spoke. “Oh dear, I am sorry I-… Give me a moment” Raising his hand up into the air, the doctor attempted to get the attention of some kind of official, or perhaps another doctor on hand at the scene. Unfortunately he himself couldn’t play the role of doctor here, and weirdly enough had always been laughed at when he’d tried that sort of roleplay with… Hm, he supposed he’d never been all that great until more recently. Shrugging that off, he shouted out: “Can we get someone over here please? A doctor or… Someone like that” "Whatever do you mean? I'm perfectly fine" A scowl spread across the chef’s face, as he attempts to disagree, argue… Something along those lines. He clearly didn’t think he needed some medical assistance, but then neither did Brycen. In fact what was about to happen might require some sort of checking of his heart but that was about it. Soon after had he called out a young friendly looking woman had appeared, light brown hair tied back in a ponytail. In any other circumstance the doctor would have perhaps asked her for a drink, and perhaps still would but… Not this second. “Oh hi, yeah this man appears to be a little lost. I think he’s a bit confused and he’s getting quite frustrated. He appears to have wandered in here alone and...” “What are you on about?! I’m here to cook, I have the right to do so and I… Do you think I’m an old lost man or something?” “See what I mean? I think it’s best he find somewhere to go and sit down for a little bit, maybe with a cool towel on his head. The heat is building up out here and with these large crowds I’m scared he’d become more than just delusional” Before anymore could be said, the General was left in the hands of a very caring woman, and Brycen crept back into the crowd, acting like he’d never been there. Perhaps he’d be taken away, perhaps this would just be a minor issue to the man, he didn’t know, but he was trying his best for Cream. Who knew, perhaps she’d let him try her… Uh… Dammit, he was terrible with food. He pondered it for a moment before he concluded on one word. Breasts. They were chicken, right? |
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| geomease | Dec 2 2017, 09:12 AM Post #27 |
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Cream quickly looked up her remaining targets, the clown prince of fast food… she wanted nothing to do with that guy. First off, she was cared of clowns, like any sane person would be. Second there were stories of those who cross him havin their ankles broken, or simply vanishing without a trace. Ever wonder what made their special sauce so special? No she wanted nothing to do with that guy, that just left Maxine ‘The Kid’ Vid as the only remaining unmolested contestant. She’d have to switch up her approach to the kid; she couldn’t just flirt with her (though they were only 2 years age apart) for fear of bringing the pop o down on her. Like she said before, she refused to be the only woman on an episode of datelines to catch a predator, never again! Making her way over to Maxine’s table she was currently fiddling with some mechanical box she didn’t understand. Cream leaned on the counter, the way the ‘cool kids’ would do at least how she imagined they’d do. “Sup daddyo, what cool foshizniz ya’ll up too taday ya digit it word up my homie.” Cream greeted, holding out her fist and pumping it against Maxines in the most awkward of attempts to seem cool and hip with today’s youth. Maxine blinking at ‘Jessica’s’ bizarre display and put down the wrench and screwdriver she was using to tune up her latest version of her ‘Microwave’ oven. “Duuude you’re like, actin super weird yo. You gotta chillax grandma; this whole thing is just for kicks yaa’aa mean? Don’t be tryin so hard ta rap wit me, jus be you ya dig.” Maxine replied. Cream could feel her rolling her eyes behind her visor. Her skin reddened what a terrible display of trying to be hip and cool. She cleared her throat and stood up straight. “Yeah alright fine, sooo, what’s this thingamajigger ya got here?” Cream asked, circling around the metal box Maxine was working on and curiously poking it a few times with her finger, Maxine extended a hand and gently slapped Cream’s away, giving her a smug smirk. “Hey hands off the goods sister, this here is the future of cooking, no matter what the rest of those snobbish old fogies tell ya. This is my patented Microwave over. It uses micro wave radiation to super heat the water molecules in food stuff, cooking it in a fraction of the time a conventional oven.” Maxine explained proudly, Cream tilted her head to the side in confusion, he didn’t understand all those words. Maxine sighed, boy this girl was really out of place with the times. “To put it in perspective, this thing can fully cook a baked potato in 10 minutes flat.” Maxine stated, putting its cooking power into perspective. AT this Cream’s jaw dropped, that… that’s not even possible. “I call bullshit! It takes a full hour to cook a baked potato, maybe 50 minutes if you use a small one, pffft 10 minutes, that’s fantasy sci fi stuff. What next, you’ll tell me that the at smoking causes permanent diseases and that alcohol is bad for you?” Cream chuckled, the madness of it all, nothing can cook food that fast. “Well actually alcohol IS bad for you, and studies have shown that smoking can cause-” Maxine began before Cream threw up her hands and waved her off. “Okay yeah you’re clearly a crazy person so I’m gonna go now. Ppfftt, cooking a baked potato in 10 minutes, HAH! Who let the science fiction writers and amateurs in here. What a joke.” Cream commented as she spun on her heels and walked off. She clearly had nothing to worry about from Maxine; she was a regular nut ball. What did she think she could cook it faster by turning the temperature up higher? She was gonna blow up her oven or whatever it was in the first round, no need to worry about her. |
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| ♦ Gigasheep | Dec 3 2017, 05:38 PM Post #28 |
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After having attempted to remove one of the contestants from the fight, Brycen finally turned his attention to the food side of things. He was starting to get hungry, and his nausea from dealing with that large greasy guy was beginning to wear off. Having done his best to stall or remove that old guy from the competition he was pretty sure he deserved some food now, so perhaps he’d go and see if he could sneak some from a stand or something. Who knew, perhaps he’d steal a contestant’s food by accident, that’d be funny. Making his way over to a stand with various different platters of food, he began inspecting it, as if he were a professional. In actual fact he was just trying to bluff until he could make a grab for some when nobody was looking. Unfortunately, instead of his mouth meeting some food, his eyes met some random guy next to him. The man looked fairly frail, but smart, obviously one of those types… The ones which when he’d been learning to be a doctor there had been an abundance of. “It certainly looks good, doesn’t it. Hmph, I guess in that regard I’m pretty lucky. Thinking of entering? I’d be interested to try some of your food” “Oh, a judge are you? Well, you’ll be trying my… Friend's food then, she’s entering this competition and if I know her well she’ll be a pretty strong contender. Just look for the one with blonde hair and questionable looking dishes” He chuckled a little bit to himself thinking about the weird display of food which Cream could come up with, before his attention turned back to the man that was encouraging him to walk alongside him. Aware that he could grab some food later, he shrugged and joined the man as they walked towards the sea, soon leaning against some railings next to the steps. He’d never understood why they had steps down into the water, but perhaps it was something to do with the tide rising and falling, or maybe it was for the boats… He pondered no longer as the man spoke again. “It’s nice round here. Perfect place to hold a cooking competition if I’m honest with yer… But hey, I’m sure your friend will do great, I look forwards to trying their cooking” Brycen nodded slowly, unsure why he’d been called out here to talk to him when he could have saved the sentiment and just said that by the food where he could have eaten. Deciding he was just being friendly, he patted the judge on the back. This guy seemed cool. Unfortunately, the pat turned into more of a smack, and being the lightweight man he was… Well… The doctor could only watch as the man flew forwards, clipping his hip on the end of the barrier and then stumbling down the stairs and into the salty water below. “Uh, sorry about that” The doctor apologised halfheartedly, almost entertained by the man’s show of weakness and almost theatrical fall. The sound of his hip hitting the metal bar had been a bit rough, and it was a little depressing to watch as the man failed at performing any sort of swimming manoeuvre whatsoever. Had he never been taught how to- Oh crap he was drowning, and it was totally his fault! Uh, what do you do in this sort of situation… Uh… WHERE WAS RUNE-GUY, HE COULD SWIM! Wait… So could he… Sighing a little bit, the doctor made a move to dive in after the failure of a swimmer, only to forget all about the stairs which were entirely in his peripheral vision, tripping and belly flopping accidentally into the judge full pelt. The two submerged completely, the breath leaving the doctors lungs the ocean suddenly became a whole lot more… Blue. Slowly his hair dye, and other various blue extras across his body seeped out into the water as he sunk down in the water, stunned and out of breath. Nearby to him, the judge too slowly sunk, although he was completely unconscious and had inhaled enough water to create a fairly powerful water balloon out of his lungs. As the doctor tried to regain his focus, a question rung through his head over and over… Just one damn question… Where was Rune-Guy? Where? The doctor pondered the thought as the two sunk slowly deeper into the unknown, with nobody having seen them to save them. Truly, at this moment, he was alone, ignoring that other guy drowning with him. No, he was truly alone! Nobody would take this manly moment from him. Or… Was he?! Just the thought of manly… The God himself awoke inside of him, his body turning from a skinny frail merchant doctor, into the one and only runed hero. Back at the steps, one or two people had gathered around out of curiosity as to why there were so many bubbles forming around an oddly blue patch of the ocean. Soon they would be treated to an answer, and it wasn’t that the judge guy had let rip under the water! No, that had been Brycen in his confusion, but that wasn’t the answer they would be getting. No, instead, they would be treated to the sight of a muscular purple haired man bursting from the water, an unconscious skinny man slung over his shoulder. Landing almost perfectly on solid land, the hero took in a deep breath, before laughing loudly. “Hahaha! I return! And I have saved this poor man, someone get him a… He’s not breathing!” The hero declared, throwing him onto the ground surprisingly gently before applying a bit too much force when punching him in the chest. A cartoonish spurt of water erupting from the judges mouth akin to a fountain, and then another and another as he continued to remove water from his lungs. Soon, no more water was leaving and… THE MIRACLE OF LIFE! Rune-Guy had just emerged from the ocean after so long of not being seen, like Poseidon himself saving a poor drowning soul, removing the water from his lungs and bringing him back from the grave. The hero stood up, raising his arms into the air, and laughed again: “Haaahaha, I’m glad that you’re alive sir. I saw you fall in and… Well I couldn’t let you drown now could I?” The judge looked up, smiled a little bit, and blacked out. He wasn’t going to be in any position to taste the food now. A few people crowded round and what appeared to be a doctor charged over, beginning to check the man to make sure that he’d make a full recover etcetera, whilst Rune-Guy began to walk off, a plan slowly coming into place completely accidentally. With them being one judge down… Well he’d just have to be the hero of this food contest too wouldn’t he! Laughing again, he began to step towards the crowd, his bare chest baring countless muscles, his black baggy trousers surprisingly dry for someone that had just taken a dip. His bare feet clapped against the stone floor as he grabbed a pair of sunglasses from his pockets and put them on. Today was a good day. The hero was back. |
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| geomease | Dec 7 2017, 09:06 AM Post #29 |
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Fabulous
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The combined tactics of Cream Pye and Brycen Watts were… ineffective all things considered. Brycen had actually had the most success, actually causing folks to consider the man a confused geriatric until he managed to fish out his ID card displaying that he was an official registrant. The group of misfits were gathering up in preparation for the drawing. Cream Pye was slightly nervous about her competition, all of them being veterans of the competitive cooking scene, but she had confidence in her capacity for culinary cuisine. They set up a standard lottery draw system to decide who faces who n each round. Turns out Whimpy was just an annoyance tactic, similar to how Cream had brought Brycen along, and wouldn’t actually be participating. Cream watched as the screen flickered to life and their names began to pair up. 1st round Bargler ‘The Ham’ Jackson vs Ron ‘The Don’ Donald in a burger slinging showdown. Gwendolyn ‘Smugface’ Wendolyn vs D’Arby in a Fish themed face off. The Grimace vs General ‘Kentucky’ Sanders in a Custard themed match. Jessica Goldenrod vs Maxine ‘The Kid’ Vid in a potato themed punch out. Cream heard Maxine jump up with an energetic fist pump, apparently thinking she had the edge what with her whimsical claims to be able to flash cook a baked potato in her microwave in 10 minutes flat. Cream had this match in the bag obviously, that microwave of hers was going to blow up in her face, maybe that’s why she was wearing safety goggles all the time. The Bargler seemed unexpectedly pumped up for face The Don, Cream would have thought that he’d be shitting himself for going against the toughest out of the gate. The General seemed nervous, The Grimace was an intimidating foe, Cream wished she had gotten the custard theme Gwen and D’Arby were at odds, though D’Arby seemed far more uncomfortable with the match up than Gwendolyn. “Hah, this’ll be a piece of cake. I wonder where Doc Boy is… ahhh damn it, figured he’d vanish right when I needed moral support, stupid Brycen and his stupid handsome face…” Cream grumbled as she made her way to the ingredients table to find the best bits for her dish. She quickly ran possible recipes through her head, before finally coming up with her dish idea. She had to fight for her selection, but he got what she needed, and was confident enough to use her food producing abilities to fill in the gaps and enhance the flavors for whatever else she needed. Cream walked through the gates of the coliseum, passing under massive statues of cross forks and knives. There was a dull roar that grew louder as she and the other contestants exited the passageway and stepped onto the field. The coliseum was jam packed, cheering screaming fans from around the island, and indeed around the world clamoring to get a look or a whiff of the culinary combatants. Cream felt slightly nervous, that was a lot of people watching her. If she messed up, the whole world would see it… well they’d see Jessica Goldenrod fail anyway. Besides, she had to accept that most of these people had seen her naked after she agreed to shoot that movie Backdoor Barnyard Booty Buster’s 17. “Alright Cream you can do this, just imagine the audience naked…” She thought to herself, closing her eyes and suddenly imagining the whole audience and her competitors naked. She looked around, and her face turned red, a dribble of blood running down her nose, that was a lot of naked people… and the Grimace whom she couldn’t even imagine what he/she/it looked like down there. She took he spot at a station opposite of Maxine, the young girl sticking her tongue out at Cream tauntingly, Cream responded by flipping her the bird. “Now then contestants, you will have 1 hour to prepare your dishes before they will be tasted by our panel of judges. In exactly 1 hour your dish, whatever its completion, will be presented. If you finish early you may serve your dish early as well. Now then, get ready, get set… GO!” The announcer shouted into his den den amplifier. Maxine and Cream got to work, Cream knew just what to do, but it was going to be tight, her timing had to be perfect. Preheating her oven to 400 degrees in preparation, she started with the dough. She began to mix the flour with salt and sugar she created using her own cream, molding it from her hands and mixing it into the flour compound. With her abilities she could make the salt and sugar jam packed with more nutrients that would normally be possible, perfect for what she had planned. With a bit of pulse mixing, and some steaming, she had formed a good bit of dough; she tossed the creation in the fridge to let it all cool while she prepped for the next part. Setting a skillet to cook on medium heat, she tossed in a leek to heat it up to just the right temperature. Next she had to mix the goat cheese, her own hand made creams, and garlic into a bowl with salt and pepper. The processes were going great, now she just needed to wait for the dough to be properly chilled. She looked over to Maxine who was working on some kind of baked potato. Wait… that was... a twice baked potato recipe! Was she nuts, that kind of dish wasn’t possible within the time limit! But… she was already thoroughly through the first part with that bizarre microwave oven of hers. Did that thing actually work? Well shit. technique
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| ♦ Gigasheep | Dec 10 2017, 11:42 AM Post #30 |
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Sheepsu
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Now it was time for the competition. The hero slowly made his way over to the judging podium, with his plan of how to convince these people to let him be a judge slowly but surely forming in his head. He had to move past countless people to get there, so in the end by the time he’d arrived at the podium it wasn’t like he had zero ideas… Although very little ones. Still, he could explain what had happened and they’d make their minds up from there. As he stepped towards the stairs up to the podium, a large but inferiorly muscled man stepped in front of him, stopping him in place. It was clear he wasn’t the judge, but it had only been moments since he’d been rescued, news wouldn’t travel that quickly. “I’m the stand in judge. The actual judge just fell in the water and nearly drowned, he’s in no shape to be tasting food. Seeing as I just fished him out the water, isn’t it only logical that I take his place? I’m more than willing to, I’ll be the hero of this competition too!” He chuckled a little bit, but the man in front of him didn’t seem so entertained. Instead, he kept a rather stern expression, until eventually it softened a little bit, most likely as he could clearly see the man had gone for a dip, and there was little reason for anyone to logically otherwise. Plus he could clearly just throw him out if it turned out to be a lie. Well… At least he could try, but it was very unlikely he’d manage such a feat. With a little reluctance the man stepped aside, allowing the hero to ascend to his rightful throne alongside many other ‘prestigious’ tasters. Turning briefly, he simply said: “The names Rune-Guy by the way, just in case you wanna showcase me” The hero grinned and laughed loudly as he pressed his thumb to his chest to show he was talking about himself… Duh. He then continued to climb the stairs, with some energy in his steps (no pun intended) until he reached the top. He then proceeded to claim the remaining chair on the end, and sit himself down. He received odd looks from his fellow judges, but they’d learn to love him in time! As he got comfy, he pondered if giving away his real hero name was a smart move, before deciding that in the end marines would be too busy looking at the food to care, and his bounty was low enough to let him slip under most radars. Although… Even with their low bounties the chaos they had blamed on them on Desertia… Ah whatever. The hero’s eyes scanned over the countless people below, in particular the contestants who were already slaving away looking for ingredients and working on their meals. A whole hour to wait… Well he supposed some people would finish early. After all, what was there to do with custard apart from put it in the microwave and maybe server it with a basic sponge… Oh that’d be nice now, he felt a little chilly from the water so he needed warming up. The hero sighed, this was going to be a good day. |
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