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Writers Block
Topic Started: Feb 21 2009, 08:13 PM (221 Views)
Masquerading Doll
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So, it's been about two-three weeks since I've tried writing anything.
Okay, that's a lie.

I've tried.
Very hard.
It just seems, that my words are no longer good enough. They're always on the same wavelength as the last and everything I've written.
I don't really see the reason for trying to write anymore, it's becoming more of a bother than a pleasure.
Although, I do miss the euphoric feelings I get while writing. Thinking that my words might, just might, make a difference. Or touch someone's soul.
So, having said this, I'm going to stop trying to force my words. Just going to see what happens when I wait.
If anyone has any ideas, and you know my writing style, hit me up. Seriously, I need some.
While on this wavelength I figure I should let you know; if I'm distracted, cruel, cold, angry, or any other emotion for no reason, don't worry. I'm just being a teenager.
I was speaking with someone close to me the other day about being bipolar, and she said, "With teenagers these days, they have no coping skills. So, yes. You're bipolar. All teens are.
Random, I know.
But, it made me think. I know I'm not bipolar. Sometimes, I really wonder, though. I think we all do.
When my muse decides to rear it's head again, I think that'll be one of my subjects. Who knows with me, though. Not even I know myself.
Yes. I know this is random. And, quite stupid or whatever. So what? I'm asking for ideas to spark me. You have any, let me know. Just make sure they're in my range of writing. Read, comment, enjoy, whatever. Or not. Doesn't matter to me.
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NeonXCupcake
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Resident Pain In The Ass
It's not only you.
The crap I've been forcing out lately is just that.
Crap.
I think when they killed Xpush, they killed the writing part of my soul.
:[
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Masquerading Doll
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Naw. You just need to get back into your flow.
I haven't been able to force ANYTHING out.
It's just..nothing. The same words circling in my head.
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Gibson
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Head Greeter/Mod
I was diagnosed with Manic Depression (Bipolar disorder) 2 years ago and I have figured out that most people have the wrong idea about it. A Lot of people think that a person with bipolar disorder will alternate between happy to sad to angry. Manic depression works in cycles that go between poles of mania and depression, a person with manic depression usually stays in these phases for weeks and even months at a time. It is nothing like mood swings like most people think it's kind of depressing that they think this, I'm actually extremely happy that they have 2 names for it or I wouldn't admit that I was manic depressive.

Here is a more detailed description i found on the web


This page seeks to give an overview of as well as to define manic depression.

Manic depression can be defined as a medical condition where the moods of a person alternate between mania and depression. Mania is characterized by hyperactivity which is way above normal, while depression is characterized by abnormal lows.

This medical condition which alternates between mania and depression is also referred to as bipolar disorder. For short, people also sometimes refer to the entire condition as bipolar depression. Strictly speaking, though, the definition of bipolar disorder includes both manic and depressive states.

As we define manic depression or bipolar mood disorder, let us first discuss the two different phases. When a person is going through the manic phase of bipolar disorder, his or her thought processes are affected and they are not able to control their anxiety and hyperactivity. During the depressive phase of bipolar disorder, patients experience serious depression, and untreated bipolar depression can be responsible for suicide.

If the manic phase of bipolar disorder is not very severe, the patient might actually feel energetic and become extremely productive. Whereas, during the depressive phase, all this disappears and patients go through severe depression where all activity and action is replaced with overwhelming feelings of loneliness, hopelessness, and sadness.

For family and friends who are observing these patients, these signs and symptoms are a strong indication that the loved one is suffering from bipolar disorder. The two phases of mania and depression, however, switch quite gradually. Each phase can last from several weeks to several months.

As we define manic depression, let us now talk about some of its symptoms. Some patients suffering from bipolar disorder sometimes experience psychotic symptoms, which include auditory and visual hallucinations accompanied with delusions. These psychotic symptoms could manifest during the manic phase as well as during the depressive phase.

Auditory hallucinations include patients hearing voices and visual hallucinations include seeing different things. Delusions of grandeur experienced during the manic phase include patients believing that they are a famous personality, mostly the President or Vice President of a country, or a physician, teacher, etc, and they often speak and conduct themselves accordingly.

During the depressive phase, however, these delusions make them feel they are miserable, bankrupt, and lonely. These symptoms are often confused with schizophrenia, which is another mental condition. It is during the depressive phase of bipolar disorder that people feel extremely guilty, sad, lonely, and contemplate suicide.

There are high chances of relapse in patients suffering from this condition, especially when the condition is untreated or the treatment is incomplete. Therefore, patients suffering from bipolar disorder need to be diagnosed and treated at the earliest. Treatment typically includes a combination of counseling, psychotherapy, and pharmacological drugs. All this accompanied with a strong support system in the form of family and friends will go a long way in curing patients suffering from bipolar disorder.

Edited by Gibson, Feb 22 2009, 08:34 AM.
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BlenderCat
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I don't even call it blockage anymore. I "kind of" would like to write something but I'm not gonna try to force it. I'm not good at forcing things. I tried that a few months ago. I was consciously trying to experiment, trying to make myself do new things. Some were interesting. Some were stillborn on conception. So at least it's not like I HAVE to write something and I can't find the words, like they're on the tip on my tongue or something. That's always a bitch. Right now, I just ain't feelin it. I try to at least get in the habit of writing SOMETHING every now and again. I mean hell, if you wanna get technical about it, I'm "writing" right now, though it's obviously not quite the same thing.

Maybe I'll start reading again. That's usually helped in the past. I'm usually always doing something to either stimulate my brain, make new connections; reading, listening to music, watching movies, etc... I was watching a bunch of old foreign films the other day (Those black and white movies were so beautiful. Even when I didn't want to be bothered with reading the subtitles, I could just lay back and admire the visual language of the film... *is suddenly shocked from reverie by hungry cat leaping into lap*) What was I saying? Oh yea, either that or getting some kind of release; playing the guitar, writing... But lately I haven't been doing much of either. I got a new band and a new guitar. That was good for a while. I'd sit around practicing for hours every day. But we haven't been playing much lately and my guitar is a broken down piece of shit now. My old band is subtly hinting that they "might" want to get the band back together. I was the lead guitarist and also took care of all the vocal harmonies. Since it's hard to find anyone around here who can even do one worth a damn, after I left, they broke up the band. I need to get out of the house!!! But until that time comes, if it comes, I'll just keep concentrating on getting fucked up. Take right now as an example. Maybe that's one of the reasons I can't concentrate. Hmmm... I wonder.

Edited by BlenderCat, Feb 23 2009, 09:54 PM.
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Masquerading Doll
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Jason, you ramble, lol.
Thanks for the description, Andrew. :]] I wondered if anyone would bother with it.
I'm getting to where I don't do anything anymore. I don't bother with texting, no phone calls, no dates, not even with family/friends. I go to school, drift through my day, do what I have to. But, I often don't even remember that day, don't remember speaking to anyone or what we did in class. Then, I get home and I either sleep, cry, or lose myself in music. Mostly, I do all three. I hardly bother to read anymore. I'm having to force myself to stay on this site.
I'm changing so much, and I don't know if this is just part of it, but I know I dislike it. And, I don't have my healthy addiction anymore, I can't write. So, it's all bottled up, and it's getting to be too much for me.
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m&m.Michael.
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I do not remember when I started writing poetry. I started at a very young age, because I taught both of my brothers to write. I managed to get Charlee hooked on it, and he progessed even more by writing lyrics and creating his own music. However, Todd only writes when his emotions are at their peek.

You are probably wondering, what about me?

Well, for me...reading poetry has just as much meaning as writing poetry. It has been three years since I have written anything, just now started up again. I did not lose or gain anything, everything just sort of stood still as far as my poetry "skills" went. Which is nice, because you can always pick up poetry right where you left off.

My advise to you? Look to the positive side. Maybe it is a smart choice to take a break from writing. However, I would not suggest three years like I did. My point, invest in reading poems as much as you wrote them...it WILL help you gain back that feeling. Who knows, you could even pick up a new style or point of view :)
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Todd-ster
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Quote:
 
However, Todd only writes when his emotions are at their peek.


^ well, fuck you then lol.

and lunar........your that stuck on writing? well go punch someone in the face and write about how awesome it felt. that is what i would do if i wanted to write really bad. apparently, i only write when "my emotions are at their peek"

michael......you annoy me........greatly. i want my face back.
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ShiloFish
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Shilo Of The Fishingness
Masquerading Doll
Feb 23 2009, 09:37 PM
I'm changing so much, and I don't know if this is just part of it, but I know I dislike it. And, I don't have my healthy addiction anymore, I can't write. So, it's all bottled up, and it's getting to be too much for me.
Try what I did. Write a thingy about every single screwed up thought in your head. Get em out. Its like a bridge. All the bad thoughts are old cars that keep breaking down. They create so much blockage that the Beemers (good thoughts) can't get through to the other side. So what you need to do is blow the fuck out of the bridge. Reduce it to smoldering ruins, ashes. Destroy every single piece of it. Then start a new bridge. One that only Beemers are allowed to drive on. Or do other stuff. Maybe i'm crazy...Sounds like a good idea to me though.
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Masquerading Doll
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Thanks, Michael, lol.
And Todd, I don't have to punch someone in the face, we had a ceremony at school today, and my principal has thoroughly galled my ass. I'm starting a new topic about it, so you'll see what I'm talking about soon.
I'm hoping to write a poem about that, that is after I write him a letter.
Oh, and Shilo. I like that idea, lol. I'll have to try it.
Nonetheless, thanks for the advice, guys. :]]
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