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Twas a The Night Before Bloody Christmas
Topic Started: Dec 11 2010, 04:40 PM (109 Views)
Dinkum Tanglepike
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Chief of the Pantry
Yes its that season again so to start the ball rolling with Christmas good cheer and much merriness
Here ie the Night Before Christmas Australian Style by Jackie Cooper (poet)\
So reach for the esky, grab a tinny and throw a bumper down your throat.....mate!


'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house
Not a curtain was stirring, no breeze to rouse
The stockings were hung in the sun room with flair
In the hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.

The kids were sprawled atop of their cover
Dreaming of rum balls made by their mother
We had just settled our heads before the dawn knocks
Mum in her T-shirt and fluffy white socks.

When out on the grass, there arose such a crash
I leapt from my bed as quick as a flash
Away to the window I flew like a streak
Tore open the fly screen and had a quick peek.

The moon on the rise of the new fallen dew
Gave the lustre of midday, an illuminous hue
When, what to my bloodshot eyes should approach
But eight kangaroo and a Cob & Co. coach.

With a wizened old drover so nimble and quick
I knew in an instant it must be St. Nick
More rabid than cane toads his courses they came
And he whistled, and shouted and called them by name.

Oi ! Harry, Oi ! Barry, Oi ! Billy and Bob
On Sally, on Sue, on Donna and Rob
To the top of the verandah to the top of the fence
Now bound away, blast you, if you have any sense.

And then, a quiet tinkle I heard on my roof
The padding and shuffling of eight kangaroo
As I pulled in my head and was turning around
I was surprised by a figure that stood in my lounge.

He was dressed in a singlet, rubber thongs and blue shorts
His clothes were all dusty from his trip way up north
A rucksack of toys flung upon his back
He looked like a swaggie just opening his pack.

His eyes how they crinkled on his weather-beaten skin
His cheeks were sunburnt, a glow from within
A crooked easy grin and cocky simple smile
The beard on his chin a salt and pepper sprinkled pile.

The butt of a roly, he held tight in his teeth
Blue smoke a cloud, an obnoxious wreath
He had a broad nose and a round beer belly
That shook when he laughed & emitted something smelly.

He was chunky and fat, a right jolly old drover
And I laughed when I saw him, he looked like my father
A wink of his eye and the nod of his head
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.

He spoke not a word but went about his duty
And filled all the stockings with sweet tasting booty
Laying his finger alongside his nose
He vanished outside and to the roof he rose.

He sprang to his coach to his team gave a whistle
And away they all bound as swift as a missile
But I heard the abuse as he flew out of sight
Jeez !! Harry and Barry, I said turn to the right!
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Issel
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Lorekeeper
I laughed so hard. Such an exact picture of an old Australian cove. LOL
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Merenith
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Blonde redhead
Oh that is just wonderful! To hear it read in an Aussie accent would be sublime!
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