Lerin

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Lerin; Companion
Topic Started: Jun 18 2008, 08:00 PM (146 Views)
DaLinkMan	Jun 18 2008, 08:00 PM Post #1
Posts: 232 Group: Monster-Human Member Member #76 Joined: Apr 2, 2008	Name: Lerin Race: Deku Gender: Male Age: 33 Goddess: Farore Class: Warrior Weapons and Armor: Lerin has a Short sword forged from the finest metals the Deku had. It has the Deku symbol on it and it handle far woven from the finest , strongest wood. Appearence: Lerin had normal Deku hair: the three leaves pointing diagonal and the middle one pointing up. He also has black leather gloves with the Deku symbol on one of them. He has shorts woven from a willow tree painted black. Personaility: Lerin uselly stays calm execpt for when he is angry , he is aggressive. He hates the current king and hates the Deku Kingdom. He hides his Deku Kingdom past from everyone because he thinks there are spies out to find him. He likes his freedom and to be away from the Deku Kingdom. Backstory: Lerin was a Royal Warrior grauding the Deku Royal Palace. He grew up mastering the sword and the ways of the warrior. Lerin stopped mostly everyone in the Garden when he was a Garden Gaurd. Once he was prometed to Royal Warrior , he wasn't able to do much and he always snuck into the Gardens and stood by as a Garden gaurd again. Lerin decided he didn't have to put up with this. Everyone was at a meeting and he wanted to leave. Lerin stayed in the throne and started cutting though wood and cut all of the cells down and let the ones inside escape and they all made there hasty escape. When everyone came back the discovered that everyone was gone and Lerin wasn't there. They sent out search parties to find him but , Lerin was already in Snowhead. He got though the temple when he knocked back a couple rooms by Goht and incased in a mountain of snow to him. All the rooms he got though were locked and unable to get though some of them. How Did You Meet?: Zeron dug him up from snow and saved his life. The Frozen Tower[redit]deitals .. deitals ... deitals..[/redit] Edited by DaLinkMan, Jun 23 2008, 09:43 AM.
	Addar_Minpro made the SSBB sig. Shenjun gave me the SSBB mini sigs. Zeron Spoiler: click to toggle Techniuqes:Diversion Items/Weapons: , , , Golden plated shortsword , Dagger , , 4 Maku leaves I am Zeron , the Skull Kid Thief ------------------------------------------------------------- Arilini Spoiler: click to toggle Compainon Items/Weapons: Fairy Longsword , Fairy Sheild , My fellow adventurer , Arilini , the Fairy Water Alchemist ------------------------------------------------------------- Lerin Spoiler: click to toggle Techniques: None Compainion Items/Weapons: Deku Warrior sword The Palace betrayer , Lerin , the Deku warrior


Kage Me	Jun 19 2008, 04:11 AM Post #2
Posts: 588 Group: Monster Member Member #65 Joined: Mar 25, 2008 Char 1 Race Poe Char 1 Class Thief Char 1 Goddess Nayru Guild Silent Crisis Char 1 Rupees 538 Char 1 Ranks 43	This character's story is strangely similar to that of Deku Link with regards to the monkey... A few other things. When did you dig him out of the snow? If you have a thread regarding the subject, please post a link here. Also, how did he end up burried beneath the snow? Finally, some grammar issues. "Weaved" is indeed a past particle of "weave", but only if it expresses movement. The word you were looking for is "woven". It's not "the Deku has" but "the Deku have". A race is a group, and because of that, plural verbs should be used. The word "tooken" is not a word. You're probably looking for either "were taken" or "took". Given the structure of the sentence, the first one is the one you should use. The plural of "monkey" is "monkeys". If you say "monkey's", it indicates the monkey's possession. There's also a couple of spelling issues, and occasionally some horrible syntax. I really can't let this pass at the time. Mostly due to the first issue (the monkey was already rescued by Deku Link, and it's doubtful that they would capture it again), but the others contribute as well. Let me know once you've revised it.
	Laos Oman, the ghastly Thief. Nealase, the ghastly Thief's raven. x2


Syyx	Jun 19 2008, 05:51 AM Post #3
What seems to be the officer, problem? Posts: 2,794 Group: Human Member Member #7 Joined: Feb 4, 2008 Char 1 Race Zora Char 1 Class Alchemist Char 1 Goddess Nayru Char 1 Rupees 35 Char 1 Ranks 5	Since when are companions&pets graded like characters? o_O
	CLICK ALL OF EM. Syyx Phineas "Phin" Arcaiya RP stuff: Spoiler: click to toggle


Kage Me	Jun 19 2008, 07:00 AM Post #4
Posts: 588 Group: Monster Member Member #65 Joined: Mar 25, 2008 Char 1 Race Poe Char 1 Class Thief Char 1 Goddess Nayru Guild Silent Crisis Char 1 Rupees 538 Char 1 Ranks 43	Syyx Jun 19 2008, 05:51 AM Since when are companions&pets graded like characters? o_O They're not. But they must still be accepted before you can use them.
	Laos Oman, the ghastly Thief. Nealase, the ghastly Thief's raven. x2


DaLinkMan	Jun 19 2008, 10:02 PM Post #5
Posts: 232 Group: Monster-Human Member Member #76 Joined: Apr 2, 2008	Kage Me Jun 19 2008, 04:11 AM This character's story is strangely similar to that of Deku Link with regards to the monkey... A few other things. When did you dig him out of the snow? If you have a thread regarding the subject, please post a link here. Also, how did he end up burried beneath the snow? Finally, some grammar issues. "Weaved" is indeed a past particle of "weave", but only if it expresses movement. The word you were looking for is "woven". It's not "the Deku has" but "the Deku have". A race is a group, and because of that, plural verbs should be used. The word "tooken" is not a word. You're probably looking for either "were taken" or "took". Given the structure of the sentence, the first one is the one you should use. The plural of "monkey" is "monkeys". If you say "monkey's", it indicates the monkey's possession. There's also a couple of spelling issues, and occasionally some horrible syntax. I really can't let this pass at the time. Mostly due to the first issue (the monkey was already rescued by Deku Link, and it's doubtful that they would capture it again), but the others contribute as well. Let me know once you've revised it. There is more than one monkey isnt there? There is also more things that monkey's can be charged with.
	Addar_Minpro made the SSBB sig. Shenjun gave me the SSBB mini sigs. Zeron Spoiler: click to toggle Techniuqes:Diversion Items/Weapons: , , , Golden plated shortsword , Dagger , , 4 Maku leaves I am Zeron , the Skull Kid Thief ------------------------------------------------------------- Arilini Spoiler: click to toggle Compainon Items/Weapons: Fairy Longsword , Fairy Sheild , My fellow adventurer , Arilini , the Fairy Water Alchemist ------------------------------------------------------------- Lerin Spoiler: click to toggle Techniques: None Compainion Items/Weapons: Deku Warrior sword The Palace betrayer , Lerin , the Deku warrior


SilverJ	Jun 19 2008, 10:11 PM Post #6
^BTW.. I look like this^ Posts: 2,804 Group: Administrator Member #21 Joined: Mar 8, 2008 Char 1 Race Hylian Char 1 Class Garo Char 1 Goddess Din Guild Pirates Legion Char 2 Goddess Din Char 2 Class Custom (Check My Profile) Char 2 Race Hylian Char 1 Rupees 76 Char 1 Ranks 43 Char 2 Rupees 110 Char 2 Ranks 13	Well, even if this is another monkey, I still think you should change some of the backstory. Possibly, you could have your companion commit some other crime or something.
	SilverJ, the mysterious Hylian ninja Ventus, the pranksterish poe Gwen, the childhood friend of a Wizzrobe Mystery, the mischevious Crow The side of evil!!!!! Alt: Maxiej, the evil ninja Alt's Companion: Chaston Noivilbo, the deku follower Alt's pet: Deathblow, the deadly attack wolfos Spoiler: click to toggle SilverJ's Items X4 Maxiej's Stuff Items: Spoiler: click to toggle SilverJ's Abilities: * Training Equipment - Deku Nut Satchel * Way of the Garo * Diversion * Spin Attack * Fire Alchemy * Water Walking * Puppet Clone Other item: And until it's docked at Great Bay, (for good) temporary control over Adad's so called "VIKING GALLEON.." (I'll ask for approval on this though, but since Ventus was on it when Xel' and his items "vanished," I want temporary control over it, at least until it gets docked at Great Bay, permanently or sunk to the great depths below.) OMG!! Reaper Splitters!!! Can you feel it, the moon's power? - Sa'i'x, Kingdom Hearts 2 Time to kick some arse - Ghengis Kant, Timesplitters: Future Perfect One who knows nothing can understand.. nothing - Final Boss, Kingdom Hearts 1


Kage Me	Jun 20 2008, 02:51 AM Post #7
Posts: 588 Group: Monster Member Member #65 Joined: Mar 25, 2008 Char 1 Race Poe Char 1 Class Thief Char 1 Goddess Nayru Guild Silent Crisis Char 1 Rupees 538 Char 1 Ranks 43	DaLinkMan Jun 19 2008, 10:02 PM There is more than one monkey isnt there? There is also more things that monkey's can be charged with. Remember, after you clear Woodfall Temple, the Deku make peace with the monkeys.
	Laos Oman, the ghastly Thief. Nealase, the ghastly Thief's raven. x2


DaLinkMan	Jun 20 2008, 10:16 AM Post #8
Posts: 232 Group: Monster-Human Member Member #76 Joined: Apr 2, 2008	Kage Me Jun 20 2008, 02:51 AM DaLinkMan Jun 19 2008, 10:02 PM There is more than one monkey isnt there? There is also more things that monkey's can be charged with. Remember, after you clear Woodfall Temple, the Deku make peace with the monkeys. oh ok.
	Addar_Minpro made the SSBB sig. Shenjun gave me the SSBB mini sigs. Zeron Spoiler: click to toggle Techniuqes:Diversion Items/Weapons: , , , Golden plated shortsword , Dagger , , 4 Maku leaves I am Zeron , the Skull Kid Thief ------------------------------------------------------------- Arilini Spoiler: click to toggle Compainon Items/Weapons: Fairy Longsword , Fairy Sheild , My fellow adventurer , Arilini , the Fairy Water Alchemist ------------------------------------------------------------- Lerin Spoiler: click to toggle Techniques: None Compainion Items/Weapons: Deku Warrior sword The Palace betrayer , Lerin , the Deku warrior


SilverJ	Jun 23 2008, 05:44 PM Post #9
^BTW.. I look like this^ Posts: 2,804 Group: Administrator Member #21 Joined: Mar 8, 2008 Char 1 Race Hylian Char 1 Class Garo Char 1 Goddess Din Guild Pirates Legion Char 2 Goddess Din Char 2 Class Custom (Check My Profile) Char 2 Race Hylian Char 1 Rupees 76 Char 1 Ranks 43 Char 2 Rupees 110 Char 2 Ranks 13	Well, it seems you have fixed the monkey part, so this passes..
	SilverJ, the mysterious Hylian ninja Ventus, the pranksterish poe Gwen, the childhood friend of a Wizzrobe Mystery, the mischevious Crow The side of evil!!!!! Alt: Maxiej, the evil ninja Alt's Companion: Chaston Noivilbo, the deku follower Alt's pet: Deathblow, the deadly attack wolfos Spoiler: click to toggle SilverJ's Items X4 Maxiej's Stuff Items: Spoiler: click to toggle SilverJ's Abilities: * Training Equipment - Deku Nut Satchel * Way of the Garo * Diversion * Spin Attack * Fire Alchemy * Water Walking * Puppet Clone Other item: And until it's docked at Great Bay, (for good) temporary control over Adad's so called "VIKING GALLEON.." (I'll ask for approval on this though, but since Ventus was on it when Xel' and his items "vanished," I want temporary control over it, at least until it gets docked at Great Bay, permanently or sunk to the great depths below.) OMG!! Reaper Splitters!!! Can you feel it, the moon's power? - Sa'i'x, Kingdom Hearts 2 Time to kick some arse - Ghengis Kant, Timesplitters: Future Perfect One who knows nothing can understand.. nothing - Final Boss, Kingdom Hearts 1


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