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| Dragons and tiger and UltraMan Parodies! Oh my!; Jeff Plays Breath of Fire 3! | |
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| Topic Started: Sep 28 2009, 09:46 PM (933 Views) | |
| Sean | Nov 6 2009, 01:07 PM Post #61 |
The ⑥of Four Against Nature
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Rule of RPGs: Every major battle on the seas has to be a tentacle monster. one that the fanbase will probably make countless fanfics about. |
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| Root | Nov 6 2009, 04:41 PM Post #62 |
The Speaker for the Dead
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I don't have any suggestions for name changes, though this was lulzy. By the way, those fanfics...they uh... They've mutated and they've got yaoi. |
Does being the only sane one make me the insane one, in a sort of way? Though my eyes could see, I was still a blind man; Though my mind could think, I still was a madman... "Yes there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run...there's still time to change the road you're on" | |
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| Jeff | Nov 6 2009, 10:41 PM Post #63 |
Lord of Pie & BBWs
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 Eureka. Seriously, I did not know you could do this. But it seems every BoF game has some hidden, obscure "Guide Dang It" method of re-naming your characters. Since I'm doing it I may as well have fun with it...  Sean remained as is. Garr was voted to be MrTNT (closest approximation of Mister Dynamite I could get). Momo became an Amazing Quest 3 reference (seriously, go read that already!) Nina became Lead (short for "Lead Weight"). Rei is my favorite character so Peco became Rem due to Rem wanting to join and because he makes funny noises.  Next is this cheery-sounding place.  It's the same old song and dance. This place is built like a huge loop unless you hang far to the right, but since we're here we may as well look around.  Ho-ho! A damaged door! Well, a little bit of A fishing rod.  *Sigh* Next up, this place looks a little more plot-relevant!  A satellite dish, apparently. *Insert obvious "Why haven't they switched to fiber optics joke here"*. Towards the back (because we'll be wandering in circles here for an uncomfortably long span of time) we find~  The most aptly-named gene in the game.  ... Yeah. Any fusion using it results in a whelp-form dragon, except for one - which I don't have yet. Those playing along at home are saying "But Jeff, how can you not have it yet? You're only missing two genes!" And my response to that would be, "Shut up and read along and you'll find out! But not this update." Inside of the big, be-satellite-dished place we find...  ... we found in the castle basement!On the platform is a key we need. So, we nab it while we're here.  We need to get up there and leap down through that glass. Why you'd want to do this is left a complete mystery until you do so. Schrodinger's Skylight, I guess. Now, while it looks like we SHOULD be able to just step off that ledge and onto the staircase (they cross heights at one point and even just hopping down, in scale, would only be a foot or two) but we can't do that because that'd be too damn easy. To get down there the way Capcom wants us to, we have to go ALL THE WAY TO THE LEFT AND AROUND. Seriously. Needless to say, this place makes me say very Un-Christian-like things.  Anyways, having found  The schtick this time around is we adjust three mirrors to bounce a laser over to "fuse" as Starr calls them. Why we have to do this is also an unknown because just BREAKING THE MIRROR would've caused the laser to strike the fuses directly. It is another mystery...  This place is rapidly making less and less sense, but now the teleporter should be functioning.  This place looks kind of familiar...  Oh crap! This is... the freighter from Steel Beach!!  ... we end up at square one!They then briefly discuss how the machines might be a gift from MrTNT's god to the world. It's worth noting that randomly from here on out the term "God" is sometimes capitalized and sometimes not, regardless of who's speaking. Which is odd as it was ALWAYS capitalized prior to these events, but there is sort of a reason for that later on. More importantly, we have to get this tower working in order to warp around to the relay points and get this game rolling. Needless to say, this is going to be remarkably painful. The enemies here are more nuisances than anything else and pretty much from the Lost Shore onwards, they begin spamming moves like Disembowel and Tornado which randomly set your party members' HP to 1. They can't even really threaten to kill you, they just PISS ME OFF!!!  The first puzzle here is a real crapshoot. Just look up a guide because you will NEVER figure this one out without one. If you just want to rocket through this place and get on with it, the solution is: Blue, Light Green, Brown.  Next is another kick to the groin.  This one isn't even particularly difficult so much as it is REALLY tedious. You can't even cheat and jump off the platform onto the center pillar, then back like Indiana Jones or some such. It just takes time and a reasonable amount of common sense. Unlike the previous update, the minigames now are beginning to suck pretty hard.  Glad that's over. Let's end this menial BS.  Oh, yes. There's one more. Where you ADJUST THE SATELLITE DISH FOR RECEPTION. I suppose I should note that circa 1997, this minigame was probably considered pretty timely and humorous as this was a common issue as far back as the '70s. However, this ranks up with Jurassic Park being run on the equal processing power of a Microsoft Xbox and making dinosaurs with it in terms of just how silly and dated it is.  Also, this is insultingly easy if you remember WHICH WAY NORTH IS. Seriously, why didn't the game just do this automatically?  Anyways, after the tedious trek back down to the teleport room (and a quick visit to Deis and Meryleep to pick up the special moves for Starr and Jeff) we decide to visit the Container Yard.  We can't actually GO anywhere there, but we can get this!  The radiance gene is the opposite of the shadow gene - granting a holy affinity. Anyways, now we warp back and go to the last area we have selectable now, Dragnier.  Huh. The emblem from the title screen of the previous two games. That can't be significant in any way, shape or form.  This town is populated by old people. We must've accidentally warped to Florida!  Sean: Do you fear my inverted mullet? Starr: Sean, stop that.  Griol: And I must say just how whacked out your party looks. Sean: You should've seen Breath of Fire 1.  They then explain they are actually the remnants of the Brood (AKA: Dragons) who fled from the goddess, Myria (remember that little footnote? Yeah. In BoF1, she was Tyr and the final boss and in BoF2, she was called Miria and was responsible for Deathevan) during the Dragon War. They gave up their power and hid on the outskirts of civilization ever since. Sean has a trippy, but altogether needless dream sequence, so we cut to the next day (important note: this event does not heal your party. Don't assume it does or you may get your ass kicked for it). Also worth mentioning is that they DO finally explain how the Urkan people, including  The next day, Jeff casually mentions how the Brood and his clan's powers are similar, even if they're not on the same scale, and wonders why Myria would've wanted them destroyed so bad. He then recommends they go talk to MrTNT who is spouting off the same four or five lines of dialog he has the entire game.  Quick! To the exposition cave!  He then gives you an abbreviated run-down of the plot thus far. They do this a LOT in Dragnier.  All the way back to THE FIRST GAME! I mean, we let Square translate it! What the heck were we thinkin'?!  Because coming up with original villains only happens in the spin-off games.  Even though they were never called "The Brood" until this game. In fact, I'm still not entirely sure why we started that trend... seemed like a good idea at the time...  FOREBODE!  Our job, as the descendant of the original Ryu and continuing the legacy of dickery from my Breath of Fire 2 LP, we need to find that bung hole and put her in her place. Jono then asks to speak with MrTNT.  It was FATE that the entire dragon clan be laid to waste? WTF? That's a pretty cheery way to view genocide. By the way, are we still watching over the tomb of Deathevan or is that not necessary anymore? Just wondering is all. Jono: YOU ASK TOO MANY QUESTIONS ABOUT CONTINUITY! Jeff: But we have a right to know! It's vital, isn't it? Jono: NO! MrTNT: Honorable Elder One, if I may-- Jono: AND STOP CALLING ME THAT, YOU BUTT-HUMPING QUITTER! YOU'RE EVERY BIT AS OLD AS I AM! Sean: Great, now the old man's pissed off.  Well, that's a request easily filled, ain't it?     Stop. Stop, stop, stop. Stop the LP. You can -NOT- tell me that this:  Is in ANY CONCEIVABLE WAY, SHAPE OR FORM superior to this:  Blow me.   Lead: So! Myria is evil?! Jono: If that were the case, the world would be destroyed. Lead: So! Dragons are evil?! Jono: That's just stupid to even SUGGEST at this point. Lead: :downs: Sean: Can we get to the point? Jono: Anyways, kneel down here, blondie. Lead: Yesh? Jono: Kiss me. Lead: Umm... Sean? Sean: ... What? I don't even LIKE you. You could SLEEP WITH HIM for all I care. Lead: *Smooch* Jono: D'oh-ho-ho. That's gewd stuff. Sean: If you say so, old timer.  We have to fight now?  We're gonna fight now, huh? Well, that's fine. Let me exchange the Lead Weight for a better fighter first. Lead: I never get to go on any missions.   Sean: Let me guess... one-on-one epic dragon battle to the death?! Jono: Hah! No.  Sean: What the bacon?! Jono: Now, inside of this box... you can't use your dragon powers. Sean: Oh, c'mon, old timer! Think OUTSIDE the box! Jeff: Didn't we make like a zillion Schroedinger's cat jokes already? I don't WANT to be the next one!  Well, as promised, we can't use our powers, but we DO get our full party. Needless to say, the first order of business is to buff the hell out of the party - particularly Sean's magic defense buff because the Dragon Elder loves spamming some damn powerful spells. Once Sean and Jeff are getting EX turns, I turned Jeff into the weretiger and had Starr constantly buff his attack power until he was hitting at the 999 damage cap. Hey, just because you can block ONE transformation doesn't mean you can stop 'em all, old man. In his death, the Dragon Elder explains his death was inevitable as they had concentrated the entire species' power into a single dragon gene he had kept within himself.  The Infinity Gene. With this, we have all the genes in the game and the power to stand up to the evil goddess Myria. Join us next time as we prepare for a laborious and difficult journey towards destiny! See you then! |
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Come visit me and my thought processes at my website: http://www.publishedauthors.net/tdotdw/news.html "In the cold light, justice and morality always look corny and you can't wave the flag and look cool. But like it or not, society needs its heroes." - John Hart; actor who played The Lone Ranger. | |
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| DarkManticoreX2 | Nov 8 2009, 09:45 PM Post #64 |
Member Rank 5
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Rabbit girl is pretty sexy. LETS PLAY FAIR YES I CAN TURN INTO A DRAGON AND YOU CAN'T |
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| Dietaku | Nov 9 2009, 03:56 PM Post #65 |
Grade A /B/tard
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Jeff, stop being so wacky. You know full well the image you have for MoMo is from an h-doujin. Thus, it is inapplicable in comparison to official art of Nina, whereas official art of MoMo has her in her robes, and thus, with no T OR A showing. Thus, all we have is the imaginations of fanboys (Of Which, I admit, I am a member) and H-doujin artists to fill that robe shaped void. Now, if you were talking Ursula, on the oter hand, weeeeeeeeeeeeell........ |
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| Jeff | Nov 9 2009, 05:26 PM Post #66 |
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Lord of Pie & BBWs
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 Now that we're done with Exposition Cave 2.0 (or maybe 3.0, depending as my memory of Breath of Fire 1 is a little fuzzy these days), we finally get a move on!  That sounds... divine.  Anyways, before we enter into the single-most tedious area in the game, as promised, I will display the other gold dragons beyond Trygon.  There are 18 genes and you can use one, two or three at a time. Of course, half of them you'll never use so~ ... yeah! Onwards!  Shadow+Trance yields Tiamat, dragon of darkness! Tiamat is actually part of the Behemoth-class of dragons, as it merges your party members together into one entity. Behemoth dragons are good in tight spots as they have high defense and HP. Tiamat also has the unique skill, Doom Breath, one of the few non-affinity Dragon Breath moves and it makes truly bizarre sounds when emulated as opposed to being in my PSOne... hm.  Miracle+Thorn+Reverse yields Wildfire, the golden whelp! No, I did not edit this screencap in any way. It actually DOES have only 16 HP, so it's breath attack is pretty much worthless. However, it has absolutely obscene defenses, making its second tech, Charge, absolutely devastating. Life's a trade-off even for dragons, it would seem.  Miracle+??? yields Mammoth, the golden behemoth and the only real use of the ??? gene. Again, this screenshot is not edited - it really DOES have 4-digit HP. Much in line with the Behemoth-class of dragons, Mammoth has unsurpassed defenses, making it tops for playable character HP and a stellar defense meaning that its breath weapon is second to none.  Force+Trance yields Myrmidon, the game-breaking dragon! Myrmidon is the 2nd-cheapest gold dragon by 1 AP (Trygon is the cheapest at 15) but is by far the best in the game. It has unrivaled hitting power, plus the moves Gambit (crit-or-miss type attack) and Aura (holy-type crit attack) as well as all 5 elemental strike moves PLUS the holy-affinity Aura Breath, making it the only non-elemental Warrior-type to have a breath weapon. The trade-off is supposed to be that Warriors have lower defense and HP than other types, but Myrmidon doesn't seem to have these problems, making it the tops for dragon forms in Breath of Fire 3.  Finally is Kaiser dragon, the most underwhelming of the gold-dragon types. It comes in three flavors. Infinity gene by itself yields the berserk Kaiser. Basically it's a huge stat boost for 40 AP, but sets him into berserk like Weretiger and honestly becomes a bigger liability than anything else. Infinity+Failure yields the Controlled Kaiser who's markedly weaker than any other Kaiser and only gives him the Kaiser breath weapon which is, again, thwarted by pitiful HP courtesy of the Failure gene. And finally, Infinity+Radiance+Trance yields the "True" Kaiser dragon. It gives us a fairly strong golden inverse-mullet, Kaiser Breath (which looks very cool but is pretty weak among dragon breath moves) and Bone Break, a sub-par attack that operates strangely, plus any skills Sean has in his normal mode, making it cost a whopping 53 AP and a 27 maintenance cost for a whole lot of nothing. I've read guides for making the True Kaiser worth his salt but unless you're planning from the very start to do this, it's still a worthless form and even then you'd need a guide and hope to God that you can get Sean's AP high enough to make it worth your while.  But I guess it does look nice. And, no. You cannot play as the darker-colored Kaiser seen in Angel Tower before the time skip. There is no "dark" Kaiser and there is no "Tyrant" dragon to be found in Breath of Fire 3. The Tyrant debuts in BoF4 and was retroactively proposed to have been hidden in BoF3, but the people who suggest this are the same people who suggest that RyuxNina is canon anywhere except BoF1, so, there you go.  ... and the Desert of Death!Sounds inviting! Let's go!  I was going to use this as a signature shot and just move on but, of course, Capcom can't make it that easy on me, now, can they? No. Of course not. That's just silly.  Oh. Right. This is the 2nd time in the game enemies who can use the "Ovum" ability are found. As you might have noticed, Ryu's egg changed to accommodate the time skip. Rei's does not.  More puzzles! This one is particularly finicky as being careless here gets your team mates electrocuted and their HP bashed down as a result. You have to hit the far switch first, run the gauntlet around the now-electric floor, hit the other and RUN to the other side. Getting hit will more than likely cause you to have to start anew here. Get past THAT little treat and you get... ANOTHER PUZZLE!  Here, you control a bot by walking around the blue platform and use the triangle button to have the robot hit the levers and kill the electric charge. This one is far more merciful than the last and a bit easier as cat-like reflexes aren't necessary. Once we're past these, we're in the clear!  Break in case of emergency? Hm. Well, urgency kind of SOUNDS like emergency. Blast it, Starr!  Once outside, we meet up with a fellow from Dragnier who offers to be our guide across the Desert of  Yay! Survival!  This looks WAY more complicated than it actually is. The only issue we need to concern ourselves with is direction. He instructs us to go North, following the North Star to do so and ignoring a fake North Star to the west of it. He also tells us to keep tabs on the "Evening Star", to the West. He then gives us this little tidbit that when the Evening Star is DIRECTLY to the west:  Remember this. It'll become important soon.  Also, be sure to get water out of this jar or you'll REALLY be screwed. Going without water causes the Wounded Battle Syndrome I explained back in, like, update number two. Anyways, we travel the desert at night to both follow the stars and avoid wasting energy by wandering under the sun.  To the left in this cap is the North Star, but no fist in sight. To the right is the fake North Star. As you walk, you'll occasionally enter into enemy-infested areas. The enemies here are pretty minor nuisances and leaving the areas involves just getting to the edge of the enclosed area. However, when you leave the area or get up from camping, be sure you're facing the right star. Remember, the fake North Star is always to the right of the real thing.   The game gives you tips in the form of these subtle clues that amount to "Do what we tell you or pay the consequences, bitch". Capcom does get its money's worth out of the desert textures, I must say. Anyways, when the sun comes up, tap start and go to camp. The guide gave us a memo for how to cross the desert safely. Remember what he said about the Evening Star being perfectly in the west from us? We go what direction again?  ... Yeah. The one time they put a typo in the game, they put it HERE of all places. You know what heading TOWARDS the Evening Star gets you? THE WRONG WAY. You head with your back towards the Evening Star until it vanishes over the horizon. If you walk TOWARDS it, as the memo erroneously tells you to do, it'll be a LONG time until it disappears from the top of the screen at which point, you're so far off-course you may as well check the Rakda (the weird camel thing) and go back to the start. I did this the first time I played this game. And spent HOURS here. You are free to rofl at me.  ~Around 45 minutes of wandering in the desert later~   Hills that move? That's not normal...  Manmo is a heavy-hitter and has a high reprisal rate but that's about it. Buff your defenses a little and use the Weretiger/Myrmidon combo. This guy is cake.  And, as usual, Nina sucks. She got heatstroke by... doing nothing. Literally.  Why not? You have the entire game!  Deus ex Machina!   And they never forgave him for it.   Oh. Great. THIS isn't culturally insensitive at all. Skipping ahead...  Skipping s'more... ah, there we go!  That's the Container Yard. And your last chance to fall back to the earlier regions in the game. Use Garr to break the crate you crossed earlier to get to the teleporter. Also, don't mess around here. Two rare monsters: Archmage and Berserker are here. They will FUCK YOUR SHIT UP HARD. As far as I can tell, the only ways to beat them involves killing them before they can move - which is pretty much impossible, so forget it. Any two monsters who merit their own unique, fully-fleshed-out turn-by-turn guide on GameFAQs to kill are not worth the effort in my book. Anyways, a short walk to the left are the ancient, city-like ruins of Caer Xhan.  Which is basically New York, LA, or Houston in a post-apocalypse film.  This looks important and someone other can Starr can mess with it! ZOMG!  Sure, I guess. I think that unlocked something. I'm assuming that's good and not some Sierra-esque trap that'll get me killed like a lever in the previous dungeon that throws lasers in the middle of my party for pulling a lever!  Looks promising.  Whoo-hoo!    This is it, everyone!  The final dungeon in the game! Join us next time as we storm the gates of a goddess to learn the truth no matter the cost! Back on the earth below~  Whoops. Vince Loretto died. v vIt was at this time I learned that the red bar (usually for hunting) is used to decide if the fairy is any good at expeditions. Ha-ha-ha! Ehh... sorry, Vince. Dr. Q is born to fill the gap and the weapon and item shops hit their maximum capacity. Next time, we venture boldly into Myria's cavernous homestead. So, join me, won't you? Next time on Jeff plays Breath of Fire 3! |
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Come visit me and my thought processes at my website: http://www.publishedauthors.net/tdotdw/news.html "In the cold light, justice and morality always look corny and you can't wave the flag and look cool. But like it or not, society needs its heroes." - John Hart; actor who played The Lone Ranger. | |
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| Root | Nov 9 2009, 05:57 PM Post #67 |
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The Speaker for the Dead
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You bastard, you used Vince as a Guinea Pig! |
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Does being the only sane one make me the insane one, in a sort of way? Though my eyes could see, I was still a blind man; Though my mind could think, I still was a madman... "Yes there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run...there's still time to change the road you're on" | |
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| Sean | Nov 9 2009, 06:37 PM Post #68 |
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The ⑥of Four Against Nature
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The fact that you know that it's from an h-doujin certainly says alot about you. ...the fact that I recognize the artwork says volumes about me, too.. |
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| Dietaku | Nov 9 2009, 08:43 PM Post #69 |
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Grade A /B/tard
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Yeah, Like all good Weeabooes, I have my favorite Doujin cirlces. That one is one of them, but he does so little work nowadays that its kinda disappointing. Oh, well, at least Leaz Kubouh will keep me occupied with NorikoXKaguyaXViletta threesomes. Oh, right, Jeff. Good stuff. |
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| Jeff | Nov 11 2009, 10:20 AM Post #70 |
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Lord of Pie & BBWs
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Come visit me and my thought processes at my website: http://www.publishedauthors.net/tdotdw/news.html "In the cold light, justice and morality always look corny and you can't wave the flag and look cool. But like it or not, society needs its heroes." - John Hart; actor who played The Lone Ranger. | |
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