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[Accepted] Eizos Cromwell; Did I do this right?
Topic Started: Mar 31 2015, 03:33 AM (606 Views)
Corbiskeith
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Yep, still hungry.
Account Name: Corbiskeith


Profile
Name: Eizos Cromwell
Nickname: "Freak-job"
Age: 21
Gender: Male
Height: 5' 9"
Weight: 156 lbs.
Guild: N/A
Class: D
Affiliation: Neutral

Appearance
Physical Description: He's fairly muscular with reasonably pale skin. His hair is pitch black and just long enough to reach the top of his eyes. He swooshes it to the side, like a messy comb-over. He's not particularly unattractive, but not the prettiest guy in the world either. He rates about a 6.5 / 10 on the bishi-scale. His eyes are of a deep emerald green, and the back of his right hand sports a large splotch of a scar. The rest of his body is fairly average. He doesn't possess much body hair aside from the small amount on his chest, nor more scars. However, weird, spotty tan-lines coat his back, probably from all the holes in his only favorite vest. He thinks a guild mark on his right shoulder-blade would look bad ass, though.

Clothing: He wears a black, sleeveless vest with a hood. A bit of fur lines the inside and fans out a bit around the hood's rim. It's seen better days... Okay, years. He doesn't tend to wear a shirt under it, despite all the holes on the back, the largest of which centers over his right shoulder-blade.

It's kind of funny that he wears such crappy clothing, because he absolutely hates the cold, yet doesn't have a change of clothes.

Accessories: He loves shiny things, so naturally he tries to cover himself in them. He wears a choker with a silver jack-o-lantern face dangling from it, 5 shoddy iron rings (two on his left ring finger, one on each index finger, and one on his right ring finger.

Extra: Little Purple Book of Horrors: A thick purple book full of what seem to be blank pages.
Satchel: Carries the Little Purple Book of Horrors and can hold small items.

Personality

He's definitely an introvert. He doesn't like to talk much, not because he's afraid, but because he's generally not interested in the world around him. Despite that, he's loyal to a fault. If someone manages to become the receiving object of his friendship, he will not fail to support them, except in the case of perceived betrayal. If he feels he's been betrayed in any way, he will come down like the hammer of vengeance and absolutely destroy them. People have been known to have panic attacks due to the sheer aura he emits when enraged. As a result, he chooses not to get too involved with others. He loves animals, though.

He holds his philosophy of strength above all else, believing strength of mind and strength of character to be something everyone should strive to obtain, without exception. He harbors great hatred for anyone who would attempt to quit in their endeavors, believing them to be "weak" and thus, lesser than himself. He believes that one is responsible for one's own happiness, and so those that allow the actions and words of others to ruin their day are "weaklings" as well.

Through all this, he puts on a face of joviality. He does this to present and practice the idea that he is in charge of his own happiness, regardless of what others think. He also likes to tease others with snark or just outright offensive ways of being, fighting people so that they'll ignore him and take their happiness in their own hands. He's a bit of a con-artist, though he's never done anything all that evil.

History
History


Weaponry/Equipment
Weaponry/Equipment


Stats - 45/45
Strength: 9
Accuracy: 8
Stamina: 9
Speed:9
Magic:10

Earned
Stat Points Earned: 0/0
Arc Points Earned: 0/0
Jewels Earned: 100,000/100,000

Sources
Sources


Skills & Disciplines

- Dancing: Because he came from an affluent family, he was taught from a young age how to dance about a ballroom with poise and dignity.
- Etiquette: He knows which fork to use for what part of the meal. And how to present himself as a perfect gentleman.
- Brain-teasers: He'd made a hobby of making these as a kid, and gave them to his younger sister to figure out. He left one in particular to tell her where he was planning on going.
- Lying: After leaving home, he needed to protect himself from the wrath of others, as well as weasel his way out of bad situations.

Magic
Magic Name: Nightmare Shift
Magic Type: Take-Over
Tier of Magic: 2
Rank: 2
Magic Description: User can take on the form of various monsters, including: Frankenstein's Monster, Mummy, Werewolf, Vampire, and Jack O' Lantern, The Butcher, The Reaper, and the Mad God (which kinda looks like Cthulhu). It was a magic he was able to use after the events with the purple book. Stein is the only monster he feels safe channeling, due to its kindly nature... And, y'know, his skill level.
The Horrors & How They Work


Techniques: 2/2

Abominable Horror - (2)
Type: Take Over
Range: Personal
Effect: Eizos takes on the characteristics of Frankenstein, a hulking brute of a monster.
Duration: 3 posts
Cooldown: 2 posts
Abominable Horror

Edited by Corbiskeith, Apr 4 2015, 06:20 AM.
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Corbiskeith
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Yep, still hungry.
Okay, I think this is done and ready to be moved.
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Inara Serra
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Honesty without tact is cruelty.

Hi there and welcome to FTG! At first glance this is a good first go.
To business!

History:
Is really short. This should be around 18 lines.

Picture You can just remove this line since there isn't one. It can always be added in later if you find one you like.

Equipment
You can have up to 4 D rank items starting if you so wish. This would include a basic weapon or basic armor if you so wished. Just throwing it out there in case you wanted one. And by basic I mean non-magical.

Magic: Your description here is really really short. This cannot be changed at later dates without an arc of some kind, (super long cohesive story), so its best to put in what you think it should do. As in, what potential powers will you gave for specific creatures? What would you like to see it doing at later ranks?

This is the guidelines for take over and how your stuff should look. You do get the buffs (one of the major draws of TO) which are outlined in aforementioned thread.

Frankenstein TO This would do superficial damage, and would have a duration of one post and a CD of 2.

There should be a technique for the actual take-over as well.

You do gain natural equipment with TO which is outlined in aforementioned thread.

^.^ That's all for now. Please remember to reply to this post when edits are done.
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Corbiskeith
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Yep, still hungry.
Thanks for the feedback! I added a ton of stuff and did some reformatting, so hopefully everything looks correct. By the way, can an Adaption Skill be used to do a major form change? Like from chubby generic mummy to skinny Pharaoh mummy? And should I put a Rank Progression chart for every skill, including the TOs I don't have yet?

Also, if there are too many forms listed in the "Horrors & How" section... I understand lol.
Edited by Corbiskeith, Apr 1 2015, 10:29 PM.
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Inara Serra
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Honesty without tact is cruelty.

Have to say, I like your style. I giggled a bit on all of this

We don't have adaptation skills, but if you would like to slightly change appearance as you rank up that's fine (just put it in a rank progression table.)

It's not necessary to add rank progression tables until you actually make the technique.

Still need duration and cooldown on tecniques.
I recommend duration of one for each of these, and cooldown of 2. ^.^
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Corbiskeith
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Yep, still hungry.
Lol I'm glad my sensibilities are appreciated. I added tables for the two abilities on there, and those include cooldown times. Durations are just 1 post, so I put them under the skill info.

And about Adaptation skills, they're listed in the Tier 2 TO stuff in the thread you linked... ? I'm confused 0_0;
Edited by Corbiskeith, Apr 2 2015, 02:21 AM.
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LunarCataphract
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A-Class
We do have adaption techniques. They can give up technique A to gain technique B. Or drain ten SP from any stat, except magic, to boost another by an equal amount. And you can also change natural equipment with this as well. However you can't change the appearance of the Take Over Form. You probably know this but I'm just summing up the information.

Anyway. Apart from that this character looks a-okay. Still are you sure you just want things like punching a person and spitting at them as your techniques? While they are doable as techs they just seem to be very...limited. Either way if that's what you want then it's okay by me. Also to make this clear the cool down for TO forms is a global cool down. Meaning when that two post cool down starts it affects every technique.
Edited by LunarCataphract, Apr 4 2015, 11:49 AM.
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Corbiskeith
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Yep, still hungry.
Thanks, I really appreciate the clarification on those.

There's at least one more skill on the way for Stein, but I might just add it early in my weapons or something. It involves using bear-traps as teeth. I'll just go ahead and pop it in there and see what you guys think? I'll also add more skills later as the TO ranks up / I get more TP. I'm not sure what other kinds of skills he's allowed to have, what with the NE for these guys not being allowed to leave their body.

Unless there are some more suggestions or fixes I need to make, I think this guy's ready to go.
Edited by Corbiskeith, Apr 3 2015, 05:14 AM.
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AuraLex
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Ask away; I have all the answers.

Spitball
-Rank 1 lets see... 1 post (Slippery/Sticky/Acidic) and 3 posts (Smell.) This of course can increase as you rank up the technique.
-You can probably remove the first "1 post" as I don't really see what that accounts for.

The Tooth Fairy can bite me!
-You say that the teeth lasts until the TO ends but then you say that it lasts for 1 post because of "Duration: 1 post." Which is it? That said it needs to have a duration, it can't just be until the TO ends. At Rank 1 I'll give you 2 posts, at R2-3 it can be 3 posts, and so on and so forth.
-At Rank1-2 you should note that it's the equivalent of D-Class items. At R3-4 it can be C-Class, and so on and so forth.
-Cooldown at all ranks can be 3 posts.

**If you don't like any of these numbers we can talk this out so that it fits your wants.
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Corbiskeith
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Yep, still hungry.
Those duration 1's were to denote how long it takes the technique to activate but in retrospect they're kinda pointless.

I'm cool with the numbers, I just wanted to see how far I could push the envelope here before starting. Honestly, I'm just ready to complete the character lol.
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