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Anis random writing
Topic Started: Dec 19 2014, 05:13 PM (256 Views)
AniJay
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the pocket kitty
So, this is where I will store stuff that I can't really use in a post but are things that my characters think to themselves about certain situations. The first one is a rant from Arianna. Please excuse the mild language as she is really ticked off in this rant. Enjoy.
Arianna Rant
Who the hell does that bastard think he is, calling me weak. I may be weak but nobody, I mean nobody, talks down to me and gets away with it. Since the beginning of this trip, Bones has been nothing but an ass to me and I'm sick of it. Damn having such useless techniques. I swear, I'll get him back for this. "Just you wait till I'm stronger, Bones, I'll make you eat your words." I growl at him. I don't expect him to be afraid of me but when I get angry, I'm terrifying (at least that's what I've been told). I suppose I shouldn't have expected anything less from a Tartarus guild member but he could at least have the decency to not talk down to a half demon. Why do I have to be so weak?

"Bones, when we get home, in the future when I'm actually able to do damage, I challenge you to a fight. I know right now I'm weak but that's not my god damned fault. I don't plan on getting in your way but I'll be damned if you expect me to sit by and watch while you guys fight" I didn't add the fact that I was kind of already damned as that didn't seem relevant right now.
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AniJay
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the pocket kitty
So this is a piece I'm doing for Ari that I feel like doing in first person. The inspiration is the song Undone by Haley Reinhart

My hands shake, trying to get a hold of the emotions swirling inside my head as I curl into a ball. I don't want to feel this pain, I don't want to know what it's like to have a broken heart but here I am, my heart broken because I gave someone my trust and they broke it. I know I never should have trusted him, especially when I didn't even know him but I couldn't help it. Call me Naive but I cannot help it. Perhaps this is what will wake me from this child like state I seem to be in.

I'm sorry I ever trusted you the thought swims through my mind as I close my eyes, trying to get the image of him out of my mind because I don't want this heart break, it's painful to deal with. Why am I so weak that I cannot handle it? Is it because of the part of me that is not fully demon, the human side of me that is weaker than I thought it was. I have always been one of those people who did not forgive easily and this is one of those times but right now, I wish I could just erase and forget the memories, the kisses we'd shared, the mission, everything. Why can't I let it go?

"I'm sorry
I'm really
a mess right now
I'm trying my best to get it together somehow
I can't see this way
locked up in this pain
that you left me
I'm unraveling
Looking for things that'll never be"


The words are soft as I let them free, not caring who hears me as I let the sorrow out.

"Stars fade away
they just, crash into space
disappear from the night
like you and I
Tell me where love goes when it's gone
tell me where hearts go when they go wrong
suddenly someone, is no one I've come
Undone
Undone
Undone"


It hurts, letting them out, but as they flow through my body, it feels as if a part of me is beginning to heal. I know that it is an illusion, this is all just something in my mind, but it helps me feel better.

"I'm sorry
I let me, fall for you
I can erase you
and forget you but I can't undo you
you're the hand I can't hold
the words I'm not told when I'm lonely
and I don't want you back
I just wanna have what you took from me"


I can feel the tears falling from my cheeks as I continue, the words coming stronger as I stand up, my face turning towards an imaginary copy of the man responsible for all this. I don't want to remember him, I don't want to feel this but I can't help it.

"Stars fade away
they just, crash into space disappear
from the night
like you and I
Tell me where love goes when it's gone
tell me where hearts go when they go wrong
suddenly someone is no one I've come
Undone
Undone
Undone"


I approach him, pausing just before the memory, gazing into his burning eyes as I continue.

"I'll come around again
I know it's not the end
but right now I've got no where left to begin
to begin.
Tell me where love goes
when it's gone
tell me where hearts go
when they go wrong
Suddenly someone is no one I've come
Undone
Undone
Undone"


I turn away from the memory, feeling my knees give out under me as I curl back into a ball and let the tears fall, crying as the last bit of the song dies on my lips.
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