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Forcing Children to Marry - in America?
Topic Started: Oct 14 2015, 02:38 PM (425 Views)
Moon Pie
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America’s Child-Marriage Problem
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/10/14/opinion/americas-child-marriage-problem.html?action=click&pgtype=Homepage&version=Moth-Hidden&module=inside-nyt-region&region=inside-nyt-region&WT.nav=inside-nyt-region&_r=0

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IN the United States today, thousands of children under 18 have recently taken marital vows — mostly girls married to adult men, often with approval from local judges. In at least one case, a 10-year-old boy was legally married.

How is this possible? The minimum marriage age in most states is 18, but every state allows exceptions under which children under age 18 can wed.

The first common exception is for children marrying with “parental consent.” Most states allow children age 16 or 17 to marry if their parents sign the marriage license application.

Of course, one person’s “parental consent” can be another’s “parental coercion,” but state laws typically do not call for anyone to investigate whether a child is marrying willingly. Even in the case of a girl’s sobbing openly while her parents sign the application and force her into marriage, the clerk usually has no authority to intervene. In fact, in most states there are no laws that specifically forbid forced marriage.

The second common marriage-age exception is for children marrying with judicial approval. This exception lowers the marriage age below 16 in many states, and many states do not specify a minimum age. Judges in those states can allow the marriage even of an elementary school student.

But judges would never do that, right?

Unchained at Last, a nonprofit I founded to help women escape from arranged, forced marriages, recently retrieved health department data on the ages of people married in New Jersey, where 16- and 17-year-olds may wed with parental consent, and children under 15 may marry with judicial approval.

Unfortunately, the available records do not include any identifying details about marriages beyond the ages of the participants. Nevertheless, the data show that 3,499 children were married in New Jersey between 1995 and 2012. Most were age 16 or 17 and married with parental consent, but 178 were between ages 10 and 15, meaning a judge approved their marriages.

Shockingly, 91 percent of the children were married to adults, often at ages or with age differences that could have triggered statutory-rape charges, not a marriage license. A judge in 2006 approved the marriage of a 10-year-old boy to an 18-year-old woman. A judge in 1996 allowed a 12-year-old girl to marry a 25-year-old man.

Based on my own experience working with forced-marriage victims across the United States, I am sure many of these children had to marry against their will. Forced marriage is a widespread but often ignored problem in the United States. A survey by the Tahirih Justice Center, an NGO that provides services to immigrant women and girls, identified as many as 3,000 known or suspected forced-marriage cases just between 2009 and 2011, many involving girls under age 18. Tactics used against the victims included threats of ostracism, beatings or death.

Forced and child marriages happen almost everywhere, yet only 10 states or jurisdictions have specific laws that can be used to prevent or punish forced marriage. The Tahirih survey focused on immigrants, and it identified child marriages or forced marriages, or both, in immigrant communities from 56 countries of origin in Africa, Asia, Europe and the Americas, but it also identified such marriage in so-called American families.

The survey found child marriage or forced marriage, or both, in families of many faiths, including Muslim, Christian (particularly Catholic), Hindu, Buddhist and Sikh. I have seen child and forced marriage in the Orthodox Jewish community, and I know survivors from Mormon and Unification Church backgrounds.

Parents give many reasons for forcing their children into marriage, including controlling the children’s sexuality and behavior and protecting “family honor.” Often families use forced marriage to enhance their status or gain economic security.

The New Jersey data show that 90 percent of the children married were girls, which is consistent with global trends. Across the world, child marriage and forced marriage disproportionately affect girls and women.

Unchained at Last also requested health department data on the ages of people recently married in New York State, where 16- and 17-year-olds may wed with “parental consent” and 14- and 15-year-olds may wed with judicial approval. The data show that 3,853 children were married between 2000 and 2010.

Data after 2010 excludes New York City, where statistics are kept separately. Still, the state data show that in 2011 alone, a 14-year-old married a 26-year-old, a 15-year-old was wed to a 28-year-old, another 15-year-old was wed to a 25-year-old and a 15-year-old married someone age “35 to 39.” All of those marriages were approved by New York judges.

Globally, 88 percent of countries set 18 as the minimum marriage age, but over half allow minor girls to marry with “parental consent,” according to the World Policy Center. More than 700 million women alive today were married before 18, including some 250 million who wed before 15, according to the United Nations Children’s Fund. Most live in South Asia or sub-Saharan Africa, but as these new numbers show, too many live right here in the United States.

Marriage is a legal contract and it should be reserved for adults. The dangers of child marriage are, after all, very clear: A recent report found that child marriage “undermines girls’ health, education and economic opportunities, and increases their risk of experiencing violence.”

The solution is relatively simple. State legislators should eliminate the archaic legal exceptions that allow children to wed. This is the only way to end child and forced marriage in the United States.
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cisslybee2012
The REBEL
I find it hard to believe,

But see it as a possibility with foreigners following thru with their customs or religious fanatics following thru their religious customs. But I mean, with stark Americans doing that I cannot believe.
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cisslybee2012
The REBEL
To me,

The idea of marriage period is a very bad one, and is most of all bad for children.
Edited by cisslybee2012, Oct 14 2015, 03:10 PM.
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VoiceofReason

I can't even get my mind around this one. My brain is blocked by complete physical disgust.
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Snidely Whiplash
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Well, the age for marriage is arbitrary and has varied throughout time and with cultures.
I know the knee-jerk reaction is disgust with some of this, a reasoned study and thought out reflection on this would provide beneficial knowledge on these actions.
So for example when I raised the mary kay leterno(sp) issue up many of the women here were disgusted. However their marriage has outlasted the average, even as they experience the same ups and downs in these relationships regardless of the age of the couple.
While I wouldn't want my daughter to marry at 15 for example, it seems to me just from observation that most of the challenges these couples face is not their relationship but outside forces.

Just a little something to highlight how this has changed throughout time.

http://www.todayifoundout.com/index.php/2014/02/teen-girls-stop-commonly-getting-married/

A long, long time ago.

Marriage in the Ancient World

In the Western world (and generally speaking) before imperial Rome, girls were deemed sufficiently mature for marriage and sex when they first started menstruation (and boys, by the way, when they developed pubic hair). Marriage was relatively unregulated by the state then, and instead was seen as a private family matter, so it is presumed these boundaries were flexible.

By the end of the empire, the age of consent for girls had been well settled, as the “official” age of reaching puberty was set at 12.

Medieval Marriage

The Catholic Church had rules for just about everything during the Middle Ages, and one of its most authoritative texts was the Decretum Gratiani. Written by the jurist Johannes Gratian in the 12th century, it set a minimum age for betrothal (not necessarily marriage) at seven years for boys and girls, and the lawful age for a woman to consent to marriage (and “carnal intercourse”) at twelve, although certain unusual circumstances would render marriages at younger ages valid, as well.

Gratian was followed by others including Hostiensis (Henricus de Seguisio) who opined that a young woman’s physical development, not her age, should determine whether she was ready for marriage.

Recent scholarship indicates that although medieval marriages could occur at ages as young as 12, that might not have been the norm:
Edited by Snidely Whiplash, Oct 15 2015, 01:17 AM.
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kennyinbmore
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Arranged marriage ain't no new shit. Sometimes you guys crack me up at the things that outrage you.
Edited by kennyinbmore, Oct 15 2015, 08:08 AM.
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Moon Pie
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When the average life span of the human population was 30 - 40 years it made sense to marry and procreate as soon as physically capable.

However, now that the life span is beyond that, why force a child to marry?

It's not as if these people are securing land, resources, or fortunes through the combining of families in the good ole United States of America!

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cisslybee2012
The REBEL
kennyinbmore
Oct 15 2015, 08:08 AM
Arranged marriage ain't no new shit. Sometimes you guys crack me up at the things that outrage you.
Amongst stark Americans? :unsure:
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VoiceofReason

Snidely Whiplash
Oct 15 2015, 01:14 AM
Well, the age for marriage is arbitrary and has varied throughout time and with cultures.
I know the knee-jerk reaction is disgust with some of this, a reasoned study and thought out reflection on this would provide beneficial knowledge on these actions.
So for example when I raised the mary kay leterno(sp) issue up many of the women here were disgusted. However their marriage has outlasted the average, even as they experience the same ups and downs in these relationships regardless of the age of the couple.
While I wouldn't want my daughter to marry at 15 for example, it seems to me just from observation that most of the challenges these couples face is not their relationship but outside forces.

Just a little something to highlight how this has changed throughout time.

http://www.todayifoundout.com/index.php/2014/02/teen-girls-stop-commonly-getting-married/

A long, long time ago.

Marriage in the Ancient World

In the Western world (and generally speaking) before imperial Rome, girls were deemed sufficiently mature for marriage and sex when they first started menstruation (and boys, by the way, when they developed pubic hair). Marriage was relatively unregulated by the state then, and instead was seen as a private family matter, so it is presumed these boundaries were flexible.

By the end of the empire, the age of consent for girls had been well settled, as the “official” age of reaching puberty was set at 12.

Medieval Marriage

The Catholic Church had rules for just about everything during the Middle Ages, and one of its most authoritative texts was the Decretum Gratiani. Written by the jurist Johannes Gratian in the 12th century, it set a minimum age for betrothal (not necessarily marriage) at seven years for boys and girls, and the lawful age for a woman to consent to marriage (and “carnal intercourse”) at twelve, although certain unusual circumstances would render marriages at younger ages valid, as well.

Gratian was followed by others including Hostiensis (Henricus de Seguisio) who opined that a young woman’s physical development, not her age, should determine whether she was ready for marriage.

Recent scholarship indicates that although medieval marriages could occur at ages as young as 12, that might not have been the norm:
I think your perspective regarding the argument is a knee-jerk response because it's...easy. It's easy to look at the past to try and justify this.

We are dealing with the reality and knowledge and constructs and constraints we have today. We live to be 100. We can wait to get married, and wait to have children. Early death was a valid reason to have an early marriage and start a family.

These days, there's no good reason for a 10 year old boy, or 15 year old girl to get married. None.
Edited by VoiceofReason, Oct 15 2015, 04:03 PM.
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VoiceofReason

Moon Pie
Oct 15 2015, 10:45 AM
When the average life span of the human population was 30 - 40 years it made sense to marry and procreate as soon as physically capable.

However, now that the life span is beyond that, why force a child to marry?

It's not as if these people are securing land, resources, or fortunes through the combining of families in the good ole United States of America!

B-)
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