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The Sublime Overlord of the Realm
Shayne was more right than he could ever realize. Her mother, the sole parent that she knew, caused her to be like this. Everything about aborting a child or preventing it she had learned from a mother that she labeled prostitute so quickly. She could remember making the tea for her mother several times. She felt shame for the knowledge she possessed. It wasn't about the act of passion. They were married now. She held fear and nervousness about that, but she would love him willingly though she feared it. Sigh knew that she would tremble when he would look upon her that first time. Vulnerability was not something she dealt with easily.

Though he was being sweet, she did not look at him though she did allow herself to lean into her a little more though she was nowhere near being as relaxed as she had been before. I hate the knowledge that I have, Shayne. Everything I know about men, about being with men, about love, about children, I learned from a whore. You are not pushing me into anything. I... But the belladonna... She sighed heavily. I don't suppose you know much about the plant. Belladonna. Her smile crooked bitterly. Too much and you could render yourself completely infertile, kill yourself even. It is also known more commonly as nightshade. But I should never have learned this. I should never have made it before. But my knowledge reminds me that I am my mother's daughter and it shames me, Shayne. The echo of her life cuts into my memories. Her smile faded. I thought to hide it all from you, the satchel, everything, hiding it in with the medicinal supplies. But then you suggest it... It surprised me that you even thought about it. So not only am I blighted by the memory of my mother, I am a liar and already bringing shame to you by hiding things that I should talk to you about.

She began to blink away the moisture gathering in her eyes. I have lived this life alone for far too long. I hide everything. Her dark hair dropped over her cheek with a soft shake of her head, curtaining her face. I'm sorry, Shayne. I shouldn't have hidden that from you. I will do my best to stop... to stop hiding things from you. She swallowed heavily, still shamed, both by heritage and by deed.
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Stuck Up Prigs and a Cultist Conspiracy · Phenvast City

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