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The Parliament of the DSA; Not to be confused with the similarly named, but worse, Congress of the DSA
Topic Started: 30 Jul 2014, 07:36 (749 Views)
South Jarvis
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Event
The DSA Times
 
XIANGZHOU – At approximately 8:00AM DSA Standard Time this morning, residents in the Great Empire of Kandorith were shocked to see nuclear tests being conducted by the navy of the People's Republic of Kiptoke in Kandorithian waters. The ruling Nuclear Escalation Party (which also holds seats in the DSA Parliament) claims the tests were accidental, though inside sources within Kiptoke have told the DSA Times that the tests were a deliberate strike by the NEP. Several international seafood importers have ceased trade with Kandorith.
Opinion Poll
The DSA Times
 
The DSA Times Political Analysis department surveyed a portion of eligible voters within the DSA and found the following results:

  • Proposed C-B-P Coalition: 53.3%

    • BEWUF: 20.8%
    • CPDSA: 18.8%
    • PSL: 13.8%

  • Unaffiliated: 46.7%

    • UFP: 14.4%
    • NEP: 13.6%
    • OHPSP: 11.0%
    • LPP: 7.7%
Separate polling shows that residents are dissatisfied with the slow pace of events in the Parliament, with the exception of the NEP.
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StJames
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The One Hundred Percent Serious Party will back any party willing to propose a bill to replace the Parliament building with a bouncy castle.

If none are willing to do this, we shall go to plan B and vote for our proposed Prime Ministerial candidate Santa Claus.
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Herrebrugh
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the Saint James Islands
3 Aug 2014, 03:35
The One Hundred Percent Serious Party will back any party willing to propose a bill to replace the Parliament building with a bouncy castle.

If none are willing to do this, we shall go to plan B and vote for our proposed Prime Ministerial candidate Santa Claus.
If it is Sinterklaas instead we may be willing to strike a deal here.
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Signed, Herrebrugh


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Kiptoke-Ruselia
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the Saint James Islands
3 Aug 2014, 03:35
The One Hundred Percent Serious Party will back any party willing to propose a bill to replace the Parliament building with a bouncy castle.

If none are willing to do this, we shall go to plan B and vote for our proposed Prime Ministerial candidate Santa Claus.
Allow us to make the plastic with copious amounts of polonium 210, and you have a deal.

Oh, and we vote for ourselves. BECAUSE WHY NOT
Edited by Kiptoke-Ruselia, 12 Aug 2014, 13:56.
The Commonwealth of Kiptoke-Ruselia
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Escalating Nuclear Conflicts Everywhere
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South Jarvis
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Rule Update
In order to speed matters up and make things a little more interesting, if a political party proposes to conditionally do something, and another party meets that condition (regardless of any additions), the first party must accept. Be careful what you wish for!

For example, the OHPSP offered to support any party ‘willing to propose a bill to replace the Parliament building with a bouncy castle’. The NEP offered to accept this on the condition that they ‘make the plastic with copious amounts of polonium 210’. Since this condition does not contradict the original proposal, the OHPSP now must accept this offer.



The DSA Times
DSA CAPITOL – The interim president of the Democratic Socialist Assembly, Joshua Ramos, has returned from his two month vacation in Null Island, and has immediately called a dissolution of the first Parliament of the DSA, citing lack of activity from it. Ramos told one reporter he ‘honestly thought they'd at least have replaced me’. Elections will begin as soon as the Electoral Commission finalizes the party list.



Election Results
Thanks to the incredibly efficient Electoral Commission of the DSA, the election is already over!
  • Nuclear Escalation Party: 17 seats (total 55)
    • One Hundred Percent Serious Party: 38 seats

  • Communist Party: 1 seat (total 42)
    • Brechtist-Eislerist Workers' United Front: 36 seats
    • Partido Socialismo y Libertad: 5 seats

  • Liberal Progressive Party: 2 seats
  • United Front for Assembly Progress: 1 seat

Based on the aforementioned support agreement, the Nuclear Escalation Party has now formed government with the support of the OHPSP.
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Suceavija
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The Suceavijan Hegemony Advancement and Realization Party (SHARP) hereby is established and conditionally recognizes the legitimacy of this Parliament.

SHARP promotes Suceavijan priorities and values such as establishing universal rights to nutritious food; clean air, soil, and water; comfortable clothing; adequate housing; fulfilling employment; excellent education; and comprehensive healthcare.

We measure economic success by the overall happiness and health of the whole individual as well as the entire group.

We believe that governments and economies exist to serve society. We also believe that Suceavija's Benevolent Dictator-for-Life should have absolute control of the world.
Edited by Suceavija, 14 Sep 2014, 15:40.
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StJames
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The OHPSP withdraws its support from the NEP-led government, which was provided without the consent of its membership. The OHPSP leader, Mister Nicolas Sinterklaas, moves that the Parliament has no confidence in the NEP-led government.
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Suceavija
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The SHARP supports immediate construction of an epic bouncy castle for this Parliament with the following conditions:

The BDL be given a Montgomery-Burns-style office that is tastefully decorated with late 18th-century English decor, including a comically-large rosewood desk and trap doors;

A guaranteed supply of warm, banana-Nutella crepes for the BDL for the duration of each parliamentary session. Less than 10 per day would be insulting. 20 shall be deemed adequate.
Edited by Suceavija, 14 Sep 2014, 18:22.
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StJames
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Suceavija
14 Sep 2014, 15:55
SHARP supports immediate construction of an epic bouncy castle for this Parliament with the following conditions:

The BDL be given a Montgomery-Burns-style office that is tastefully decorated with late 18th-century English decor, including a comically-large rosewood desk and trap doors;

A guaranteed supply of warm, banana-Nutella crepes for the BDL for the duration of each parliamentary session. Less than 10 per day would be insulting. 20 shall be deemed adequate.
The membership of the OHPSP has officially endorsed the terms of the proposal by the SHARP. ;)
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Suceavija
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Let construction of the People's Epic Bouncy Castle of Really Important Government Stuff commence posthaste!

The SHARP hereby affirms its alliance with the OHPSP.
Edited by Suceavija, 14 Sep 2014, 18:21.
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