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Bad Dream
Topic Started: Aug 29 2012, 11:16 AM (1,133 Views)
trex841
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Behold fellow forum members! I have written a FanFic!

This is the first Fanfic I’ve completed in a long time, and I’m hoping I’ve improved since those years. I’m posting it here because I’m not a member of any fanfic website, and I have friends on this site that I trust to look it over and judge it fairly. I’m saying this right now, it’s an MLP fic, so if you don’t like the show and your not going to like anything about it, leave now. Here's your exit button.

Another note, if any readers are going to point out spelling mistakes, I just ask to add in something positive with it. I’m new to this, I want to learn, but I also want to know if I did a good job here. I’m not trying to be Shakespeare, but I want it to at least be passable.

And lastly, there is a picture that I will put before the story that was the inspiration for this whole thing. Just a little touch I wanted to add. Well, don’t want to keep you waiting, on to the story.

Posted Image


All was quiet under the roof of the apple family household. A long day of work on the farm has left the entire family drained and in need of a good night rest under Luna’s beautiful moon. Granny smith had fallen asleep in her rocking chair, covered by the blanket she had been knitting. She rocked back and forth with each breath she took, mumbling something every so often. Big Mac slept with his harness on again, and his snores shook the rafters in his room ever so slightly. Applejack was snoring even harder that her brother was, the force of it moving her hat that was suspended above her on the bedpost. Winona rolled around in her doggy bed by the fireplace, kicking her legs in pursuit of a creature in her dreams.

The smallest member of the apple family, however, was not asleep. She was quietly creeping slinking through sleeping house. Her soft hoof steps could barely be heard as she slowly and carefully crept down the hallway to the door to her big sisters room. The old oak door creaked with each inch as Apple bloom tried to poke her head into the room, desperate to not wake up her second oldest sibling, yet. Once the crack was opened wide enough, she slipped inside and tip-hoofed up to the bed, craning her neck up to look at the sleeping form.

“Applejack.” She whispered into her sister’s ear. Said sister only mumbled in response.

“Applejack, wake up.” She tried again, now poking as her sister’s side and speaking a little louder.

“Quit it Caramel, that tickles.” Applejack giggled and brushed off the invasive hoof.

APPLEJACK!!!

Her dreamscape was shattered in an instant as Applejack was abruptly flung back into reality. She scanned the room at a frantic pace, fuelled by the adrenaline rush that coursed through veins. Once she located the source of this disturbance to her relaxation, she scowled at her with an anger backed by the feeling of adrenaline being replaced exhaustion that hit her like a brick wall.

“Apple bloom!” she yelled quietly. “What in tarnation do you think your doing, waking me up in the middle of the night like that and nearly scared me to death! You know we’ve got to get up bright ‘n early tomorrow to get the rest the crop in, an-” Applejacks little rant was silenced by a tiny sound that Apple bloom made. A sniffle. It was soon followed by a series of small sobs that she had failed to suppress. Now that Applejack had calmed down enough to pay full attention to the sight in front of her, she noticed that her sister’s eyes were bloodshot and on the verge of tears.

Her anger slinked into the back of her mind in shame, worry for her smaller sibling quickly taking its place. “I’m sorry Apple bloom, I didn’t mean to snap at ya like that. I’m just plum tuckered out from working in the fields all day.”

“It’s o-ok sis.” Apple bloom choked out, still trying to hold her sobs in. “That’s not w-why I’m crying. I-it’s because I…I had a bad dream.”

“Oh” Applejack said in realization. She sat up in her bed and patted the open space next to her “Here, come on up.” Apple bloom jumped up and made herself comfortable. Applejack put her hat on and ran her hoof through her sis’s bowless main, both trying to calm her down and fix her bed head. “Do you want to talk about it, sugar cube? It might make you feel better.” Applejack asked as she wrapped the blanket around her trembling sibling. Apple bloom sniffed again and slightly nodded her head.

“W-well, It’s kind of fuzzy in the begin, but I remember asking Twilight if I could come with her to see Zecora. The tr-trip there was fine, but when we tried to go back, the path was blocked by a bunch of trees that weren’t there before. While Twilight was trying to clear the path, I looked around, and there was another pony. *Sniff* I followed her through the forest, and then suddenly I was in this town.”

The little filly let a few sobs slip through before continuing. “At first, everything seemed fine. Everypony was setting up for a party. I walked around, and I even helped one colt find a gem he needed to give to his special somepony. The only strange thing was, n-none of th-them had cutie-tie m-marks.” She falters again, and Applejack waited patiently, patting her head until she was ready. “I didn’t r-really pay much attention to that. They were all act-acting so nice to m-me.”

“At least that’s what I thought, u-until I-I w-went into a house, on t-the oth-ther side of the town. In the f-f-fir-rep-pl-lace, there were..there were b-bones.” A tear escaped from her eye, but she wiped it away as soon as it did. “I ran back outside, and everything had turned dark and twisted.” She said a little louder, growing frantic as she returned to that treacherous place. “All the ponies turned into these rotting creatures with red eyes. They said that ‘She had the mark. She had to go.’ They chased me everywhere. I tried to out run them, but they popped out of the ground and surrounded me. They kept saying not to worry; they wouldn’t let me be like her. They would protect me. One walked up, touched me, and…and…every went red and I turned into one of them!”

Apple bloom ended her story by jumping up into Applejacks arms and hugging her tightly, no longer able to contain herself. The farm pony embrace her little sister in her time of need, letting her tears soak into her fur.

“I-I w-was so sc-scared.”

“Shh, it’s ok.” Applejack whispered into her ear. They sat there in the dark for a good long while, Apple blooms tiny body convulsing as she let every tear and sob out. Once the little filly calmed down, her older sister nuzzled the top of the filly’s disheveled mane.

“I’ll tell you what, why don’t you sleep here with me tonight sugar cube?” Apple bloom looked up with her big puffy eyes and rubbed away some stray tears. “R-really? But…but I’m to big to do that.” She said, trying to sound more mature.

“Now look sugercube. Everypony gets bad dreams, even me. And no pony’s gonna think less of ya if you need a shoulder to lean on when they happen. Not your friends, not your family, and certainly not me.”

Apple bloom sniffed again and smiled up at her big sister. “T-thanks Applejack.” She said, and then let out a big yawn. She curled up into a little ball and snuggled up to her siblings’ warm coat. Applejack laid back down and wrapped her tail protectively around her half awake sibling.

“Goodnight Applejack.” Apple bloom said, slipping into a blissful dreamland.

“’Night sugercube.” She replied, flowing her sister into the realm of sleep.

“Sweet dreams.”

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Well that's it. What did you think? I'm hoping that I might have gotten a Daww out of you or something along the line. Again, I’m new at this, so please be kind. Any tips on the writing would be appreciated.
F.I.N.D.R Field Incident Logs
A comprehensive list of all organisms, artifacts, and alternative worlds encountered by the foundation team.

At the present time, concepts within are inconsistent and ever shifting.

(And this is just the spec related stuff)
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