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| Jokes! | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Mar 24 2009, 04:58 PM (736 Views) | |
| Theboy1001 | Mar 24 2009, 04:58 PM Post #1 |
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Experienced Chatter.
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We all like a good laugh! Tell us your favourite jokes here! ![]() I got a few good ones, I just need to go find it.
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| Theboy1001 | Mar 24 2009, 05:03 PM Post #2 |
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Experienced Chatter.
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The B.C. This story is about a rather old fashioned lady, who was planning a couple of weeks’ vacation in Florida. She also was quite delicate and elegant with her language. She wrote a letter to a particular campground and asked for reservations. She wanted to make sure the campground was fully equipped but didn’t know quite how to ask about the “toilet” facilities. She just couldn’t bring herself to write the word “toilet” in her letter. After much deliberation, she finally came up with the old fashioned term “Bathroom Commode,” but when she wrote that down, she still thought she was being too forward so she rewrote the entire letter and referred to the “Bathroom Commode” simply as the “B.C.” Does the campground have its own “B.C.?” is what she actually wrote. The campground owner wasn’t old fashioned at all, and when he got the letter, he couldn’t figure out what the lady was talking about. The word “B.C.” really stumped him. After worrying about it for several days, he showed the letter to other campers, but they couldn’t figure out what the lady meant either. The campground owner finally came to the conclusion the lady must be asking about the location of the local Baptist Church. So he sat down and wrote the following reply: Dear Madam: I regret very much the delay in answering your letter, but I now take pleasure in informing you that the “B.C.” is located nine miles north of the camp site and is capable of seating 250 people at one time. I admit it is quite a distance away if you are in the habit of going regularly, but no doubt you will be pleased to know that a great number of people take their lunches along, and make a day of it. They usually arrive early and stay late. The last time my wife and I went was six years ago, and it was so crowded we had to stand up the whole time we were there. It may interest you to know that right now, there is a supper planned to raise money to buy more seats. … They plan to hold the supper in the middle of the B.C., so everyone can watch and talk about this great event. I would like to say it pains me very much, not to be able to go more regularly, but it is not for lack of desire on my part. As we grow older, it seems to be more and more of an effort, particularly in cold weather.… If you decide to come down to the campground, perhaps I could go with you the first time you go … sit with you … and introduce you to all the other folks. This is really a very friendly community. Little Johnny... Finding Jesus A Sunday school teacher is concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus, so he asks his class, "Where is Jesus today?" Steven raises his hand and says, "He's in Heaven." Mary answers, "He's in my heart." Little Johnny waves his hand furiously and blurts out, "He's in our bathroom!" The surprised teacher asks Little Johnny how he knows this. "Well," Little Johnny says, "every morning, my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door and yells 'Jesus Christ, are you still in there?!'" |
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| Kraig | Mar 24 2009, 07:11 PM Post #3 |
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Honored Chatter.
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Microsoft VS General Motors Bill Gates wanted to look good and impress everyone with his success. He decided to measure the accomplishments of Microsoft against General Motors. The comparison went like this: If automotive technology had kept pace with computer technology over the past few decades, you would now be driving a V-32 instead of a V-8, and it would have a top speed of 10,000 miles per hour. Or you could have an economy car that weighs 30 pounds and gets a thousand miles to a gallon of gas. In either case the sticker price of a new car would be less than $50. In response to all this goading, GM responds: "Yes, but would you really want to drive a car that crashes twice a day?" Kraig |
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| Johnny Hopkins | Mar 25 2009, 06:10 AM Post #4 |
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Johnny Hopkins
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Lol, Good Jokes everyone.. |
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| Kraig | Mar 25 2009, 02:49 PM Post #5 |
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Honored Chatter.
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I always liked the microsoft jokes. Kraig |
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| Theboy1001 | Mar 25 2009, 02:53 PM Post #6 |
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Experienced Chatter.
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Lol, I love the microsoft joke! ![]() |
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| Soldier 1033 | Mar 27 2009, 03:32 PM Post #7 |
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Chatter.
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Chuck Norris can believe it's butter. |
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| Theboy1001 | Mar 27 2009, 03:37 PM Post #8 |
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Experienced Chatter.
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Not a Chuck Norris joke!?!
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| Soldier 1033 | Mar 27 2009, 03:41 PM Post #9 |
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Chatter.
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Chuck Norris killed two stones with one bird.
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| Theboy1001 | Mar 27 2009, 04:09 PM Post #10 |
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Experienced Chatter.
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Another one! Ahh! |
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