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Atsumi Shioyaki; Thunder Mountain Sage of Iron
Topic Started: Nov 14 2009, 05:01 AM (570 Views)
Kienshin

[Character Information]

Name: Atsumi, Shioyaki
Age: 24
Gender: Male
Height: 6'0"
Weight: 195lbs
Eyes: Obsidian
Hair: Dark Brown

Appearance:

Shioyaki has a very durable, flexible, and lean body type that gives credit to his taijutsu conditioning he has cultivated since childhood; muscular and resiliant. His complexion is slightly tanned from being out on the ocean and his knuckles are scarred, his hands are usually bandaged around the palms. The hair upon his head is of about medium length and is in permanent bedhead array. Wears a horned forehead protector with the kanji for Thunder ( ) etched in it. His Tetsubo has a sheath that rests on his back

Upon his shoulders rest a long hanten (or Happi) over jacket, like a haori but with shorter sleeves; it goes all the way to just below his knees. It is white with black lapels and at the bottom is a bright red sawtooth design, on the back is the kanji for Sincerity/Truth. Usually it is tied tightly closed with an obi around his waist. Underneath this he wears a black, sleeveless Hanten that is about hip length and has white lapels. He wears black pants made of a heavy fabric and is cut off just below the knees. On his feet he wears fairly tall pine geta with black straps

Personality:

From the point of being born this particular individual has always been light hearted and a very content child, playing in laughter. And this has not really changed at all over the years despite a maturing body and mind. Yes folks he is still much a kid at heart and it often shines through in his actions. With a smile that would make any other person do the same. The way he treats people can be rather childish though, but in a better manner than one would expect.

Shioyaki has always had great perseverance and a mind like a sponge, learning things quite readily. This kind of attitude and make up is essential for being the son of a fisherman, helping on the fishing boat at sea. With a never say die grit and determination that transcends pain or quit. This helps in many aspects of his life, not exclusively fighting. If someone is in trouble he will put his life on the line to protect and save them from harm or mortality. Not only that but he has a steely resolve that prevents him from knowing the meaning of fear or cowardice. Every craft he knows in this life be it a fishing, martial arts, or medical stems from tramendous dedication and love. This fisherman's son has great confidence in his abilities that some could say is arrogance; but rarely does it take on a negative quality, so great confidence is more sincere. Kindness is also ever present within him, playing with children or helping anyone in need no matter how small the task.

A very odd thing about Shioyaki is his extreme taste for Wasabi that he consumes as if it were the sweetest candy. On top of that it never appears to have much of an effect on his nose or mouth. Any kind of fish he will eat with a large amount of joy, but eel or raw tuna is his favorite. Udon is the greatest noodle in the world to him that he'd even eat it plain. Finally, as he has aged he has taken to drinking sake and smoking. Yes being a medical ninja and smoking seems kind of pointless and hypocritical but he does it.

History:

Twenty-four years ago the Atsumi family welcomed a new born son into their humble abode at the edge of a forest near the coast off of lightning country. The family was the mother Oshio of course, the father Akashio, and the father's father Shioaji ; and now a very healthy boy named Shioyaki. The men of the atsumi family were reknowned for their fishing, martial arts, and medical know how, so was the fate of this young boy to learn from these experienced fellows.

From the moment he could walk, Shioyaki began fishing and training in martial arts, taught mostly by his grandfather. The boy picked up on both the fishing and the training eagerly without much complaint; the relationship between he and his father grew more with every passing moment. As the years grew on his father began teaching him medical jutsu and the other jutsu he knew, Akashio was a ninja with medical skills from cloud you see. It seemed as if Shioyaki was being brought up as a warrior with caring qualities and other attributes defining an upstanding and honorable man.

Around his teen years, around 14 the country was beginning to become more and more dangerous. Only Akashio was registered as a citizen of the cloud village so his mother and grandfather travelled as refugees to the country of Iron which was neutral. Here Shioyaki continued his martial arts training with his grand father whom began to teach him how to use the family instrument, the Tetsubo. The cold weather in this area began to grate at Oshio and she started to grow very sick...so before it became too much to bear, she returned to the lightning country, leaving Shioaji and Shioyaki to themselves there in the mountains to carry on their efforts.

At age 16 Shioyaki's grandfather began to deteriorate so he spent most of his time inside while his grandson ventured out to cultivate himself further. Eventually the harsh weather took its shot at the old timer and took him away from the plane of the living. Before his death, upon that aptly referred to metaphorical bed, he whispered something to Shioyaki before lifting up the Tetsubo with his last amount of strength...to give it to the proper heir to wield such a weapon. Ever since that moment he has spent his life in the mountains of the land of Iron in a self imposed solitude to reflect, train, and live off the land there...as a monk.

Hardly anyone knew about him there and occasionally people caught glimpses of him training or hunting. Stories began to be passed quickly among the villages in Iron country near the area. They would say there's an ogre living up there, or that that the mountain is now a domain that belongs to a Tengu. Eventually through the several years he spent up there he came to be known as the Thunder Mountain Sage, because of the sounds that would eminate from there. Even when it wasnt storming up there they would hear the crash of thunder and see the flash of lightning. All of the days training training built up on each other; every single day he trained and as such, his skill and strength increased greatly. One day it had finally occurred to him that he should help as many people as he could and so, at this moment he has become ready to venture out into the world with an Iron fortitude, dedicated toward the goal to do just that!


[Battle Information]

Class: Special Jounin
Village: Iron Country
Elemental Affinity: Wind

Traits:

Elemental Affinity: Wind
Elemental Affinities represent a character having come to realize their innate affinity and bring it to bear, making their attacks that utilize it more efficient than another shinobi who has not. All people in the world have an affinity, even if they don't utilize it. As such, even members of a clan have their acadamy slot taken by their affinity. |Point costs of chosen elements reduced by 10%| |Taken at character creation for a specific branch of jutsu| |Mixed element bloodline characters also have their second Trait slot taken by their second element as an affinity|


Tough As Nails
Your tough as fucking nails, eat lightning and crap thunder. Hardened by the war, many battles, or just naturally thick headed, all physical attacks have their damage against you reduced. This includes all Taijutsu, Kenjutsu and Doton jutsu. If the jutsu in question has an elemental attack attached to it, you still take the elemental damage in full. |Damage of Taijutsu, Kenjutsu and Doton jutsu are reduced by your Endurance+1/2 your strength| |Doesn't stack with any other passive damage reduction|

Thick Skinned
Theres just something about you. Maybe you've taken a lot of beatings and your skins toughened up. Maybe you have dense bones, or literal metal coursing through your body, or perhaps your just overweight and have an extra layer of coushin between you and all those blows coming your way. Regardless of the reason, you just have more ability to last than most ordinary people. |+50 HP per Rank|

Elemental Affinity: Lightning
Elemental Affinities represent a character having come to realize their innate affinity and bring it to bear, making their attacks that utilize it more efficient than another shinobi who has not. All people in the world have an affinity, even if they don't utilize it. As such, even members of a clan have their acadamy slot taken by their affinity. |Point costs of chosen elements reduced by 10%| |Taken at character creation for a specific branch of jutsu| |Mixed element bloodline characters also have their second Trait slot taken by their second element as an affinity|

Specialization: Ijutsu
Specialization is the strenuous study of a specific branch of Jutsu (Specific weapon, taijutsu, or a specific element). This represents a comprehensive and in depth training, and as such, a characters ability with that particular type is enhanced. Characters often have a specialization with their natural element, but this is not always the case. |Chakra(or stamina) cost of Specialization jutsu reduced by 10% rounded up, so that all fractions are raised to the higher chakra cost. Damage increased by 5% rounded down, so that fractions are rounded to the lower damage|

Main Fighting Type:
Houhai Tenraiken [Surging Thunder Fist]: Ichiban
There are two parts to this way of fighting passed down through the generations of the Atsumi family. The first part is the building of strong and resilant muscles as well as a strong sense of flexibility and balance as in many other forms of taijutsu. However, it is much more important to build a body suited for the stages of this style in which the beginning stage preceeds. Secondly a practitioner of this style must learn how to wield the Tetsubo, Iron Staff, also passed down from generation to generation. The properties of this style consist of combining the soft and supple diversion of force with the hard striking power of applied force into one unique style..this is learned with both the hands (or feet) and the Tetsubo. While developing this, the practitioner also explores subjecting their bodies to the Conductor Skill inwardly.


Main weapon(s):

Tetsubo [Iron Staff/Rod]
This weapon is like a bamboo staff only much much heavier and made of the blackest iron. It was made in such a way that it has some form of flexibilty to it and is very durable. It is 6 feet long end to end with a 3 inch diameter and is a specialty weapon of Shioyaki's, it was given to him by his dying grandfather and it seems lighter to him than it would to most. | Required- 5 Reflex, 10 Strength | Damage- 10+(1/2 Strength)

Kunai
A Multi-purpose tool and throwing dagger. Kunai have a triangular, double edged blade. Some Kunai do not have a hilt, instead a ring that makes up the tang in the end made for quick grab, throw, and swing if you attach wire or rope to the ring. Also, Kunai blades in both end of hilt exist. The shape of a kunai can be a make-shift shovel and it does not always serve the purpose of weapon. | Damage- 3+(1/2 Reflex) or 3 + (1/2 Accuracy)

Shuriken
Shuriken are multi-pointed, flat throwing weapons with sharp edges. These can be thrown efficiently and proper usage may result an instant kill. Penetrating metal objects like armor is incredibly difficult, the shuriken end up glancing off usually. | Damage- 2+(1/2 Accuracy)

Evil Wind Shuriken [Fuuma Shuriken]
A large weapon capable of being broken down and compacted, the Evil Wind Shuriken is composed of a large ring on which sit four individual, single-edged blades, each of which resembles a large knife with its edge on the back side. When compacted, the blades slide around the ring to form one wide bladed surface, and can thus be used as a melee weapon in a pinch. When throwing, a ninja will spin the shuriken around three or four fingers that are slipped into the ring to give it momentum. | Requires 5 Reflex | Damage - (thrown) 7 + (1/2 Accuracy); (melee) 6 + (1/2 Strength)


Strengths:

To begin, the main and deep seeded strength encased within this man is an unbreakable will that was forged into him by his elders throughout his whole life. However, the training he has undergone does not just show in his attitude but also in his body. He is very adept at the martial art he had been taught since childhood. Shioyaki's endurance speed and reflex, including flexibility is very finely tuned. Not only this but also he was taught the art of medical jutsu which he uses on himself as well as for the benefits of others. Despite a carefree, simple minded, and seemingly over confidant air about his persona Shioyaki is actually quite clever. Not only this but he is also very adept at remaining calm under dire circumstances.

Weaknesses:

A weakness of Shioyaki's would be the fact that sometimes his somewhat flighty temperment could lead to him letting a situation get out of hand by underestimating an opponent. Also his adversion to taking a life or putting an opponent in a life threatening situation takes a bit of an edge off of his fighting. Furthermore a majority of his fighting abilities require that he be relatively close to his opponent and lacks any real advanced long range ninjutsu. A very exploitable weakness of his would be his caring nature toward allies and generally helpless people; by attacking them an enemy could take advantage of his vulnerability apparent while protecting the attacked.

Techniques:

E-Rank

- Body Switch Skill [Kawarimi no Jutsu]
A basic skill involving quickly switching the body with another plant, animal or inanimate object that has been previously prepared. This is used to confuse the opponent momentarily and create an opportunity to attack or possibly escape. | Chakra- 15 | The user's speed is increased by 4 when switching locations with especially prepared object that is within 1' for every 2 Control the user has. | E-Rank | 3 points

- Clone Skill [Bunshin no Jutsu]
A basic technique which creates false clones of the user. The clones are used as a diversion while the user attacks. The clones are incapable of attacking and disappear if directly hit. | Chakra- 5 (per clone) | The bunshin has as much Speed and Reflex as the creator | Effect lasts 5 Posts | E-Rank | 3 points

- Secret Information Cards [Nin Shiki Kaado]
A technique which conceals information of an individual on a card. The information is burned on to the cards with chakra and can only be revealed by the user's chakra. Of course, this technique can also be used to store information on a different object and conceal it, like a wall, a door, or scroll. | Non-Battle Skill | E-Rank | 3 points

- Transformation Skill [Henge no Jutsu]
This genjutsu causes the user, including any equipment he may be carrying, appear different. You can appear up to 1 foot taller or shorter. You may appear thin, fat, or in between. Otherwise, the extent of the apparent change is up to you. You could add or obscure a minor feature or look like an entirely different person. This jutsu does not give the user any special ability to mimic mannerisms, nor does it change tactile or sound aspects of the user. | Chakra- 1 (Every Post) | E-Rank | 3 points

__________________________________


[Raiton] Conductor Skill [Doutai no Jutsu]
The basis of all Raiton jutsu, Doutai no Jutsu allows a shinobi to absorb ambient electricity from the environment for use in electricity and lightning related skills. This collection of ambient electricity is a passive form of this skill, and thus can be used without exerting chakra. Large amounts of wind or humidity make it difficult to accumulate and transfer charge. Colder weather is also preferable to warm | Passive - absorption of ambient electricity | Does not count against the one jutsu per post limit | E-Rank | 3 points | Does not work in humid or windy environment; Increase cost of all [Raiton] and electricity based jutsu without this technique or when unusable by 1/3rd normal cost rounded up; Penalties are halved in a cold environment; Increase damage to Doton barriers by ¼ Jutsu damage (if Doton weakness exists in specific jutsu, take better bonus)

D-Rank

- Explosive Tag Technique [Bakuyaku Sagefuda no Jutsu]
One of the more basic jutsu, the ninja utilizes two layers of paper that contain a small explosive and is traced with a large seal. These explosive tags can be detonated remotely, or set up to detonate when triggered. Typically, the exploding notes are set up so that they explode when something comes near, the note is touched, or a certain amount of time has passed. The tag cannot differentiate between friend and foe, but it can differentiate between sizes, to a point. It is possible to set up an explosive tag that only you can bypass by sending the correct amount of chakra to the tag, thereby suppressing the tag long enough for someone to get through. Any more or any less chakra has no effect on the tag, and one must be aware of the tag's location to send any chakra. | Chakra- 20 (Per Note) | Damage- 15 (Per Note) | The amount of chakra needed to bypass the note is set when the tag is first used and can not be changed later. If the note is set to explode by being triggered, then the chakra cost of this jutsu is paid when the trigger is set, otherwise the chakra cost is only paid when the note is remotely detonated. | D-Rank | Tags have a blast radius of 5 feet | 6 points

[Raiton] Shocking Grasp Technique [Haji Dengeki no Jutsu]
A fairly simple jutsu, the user moves chakra to his hands and converts it to electricity. A thin layer of chakra protects the user, but anyone the user touches gets a shock, and any metal the user holds transmits the electricity. It's simplicity makes it easy to maintain after activation, but this technique can be dangerous as the layer of chakra only protects the user's hands from the contact making it unusable when submerged in water and dangerous when splashed. | Chakra – 8 every post | Damage – 8 each post | Anything the user touches that can conduct electricity well (such as metal) deals ½ damage to anything else that touches it | D-Rank | 6 points | User takes damage if exposed to current

[Raiton] Static Bolt Technique [Seidenki Boruto no Jutsu]
The user projects some of his chakra, which is given a positive charge, to a location. The user then gives some air in front of his open palm a negative charge, and a large static bolt jumps between the two locations. While the lightning bolt is impossible to dodge, the location that it jumps to cannot change and must be within a certain distance of its origin, making it very predictable—assuming that the victim knows what's coming. | Chakra – 21 | Damage – 14 | Distance from Origin: Control feet | D-Rank | 6 points

[Ijutsu] Flesh Binding Technique [Ikimi Baindingu no Jutsu]
This jutsu causes the skin of the victim to stretch, grow, and fuse together over cuts and bruises. The chakra is also very hot, and is commonly used to cauterize a wound as well. Unfortunately, this jutsu is, at best, a temporary fix and is only suitable to take care of bruises or cuts. Large gashes are outside of this jutsu's ability, and the use of this jutsu doesn't mean you shouldn't go to the hospital. | Chakra- 9(Inc 2) | Healed Damage- 6(Inc 2) | D-Rank | 6 points

[Ijutsu] Numbing Technique [Jinto no Jutsu]
As its name suggests, this jutsu acts as a local anesthetic, numbing the nerves around an area and dulling one's sense of pain. This jutsu is generally proffered to narcotics on the battlefield since it doesn't hinder the mind. This will numb all sources of real pain, so its also an effective way of testing to see if odd pain is the result of a genjutsu. The downside of this is that your less likely to notice wounds, and thus it can result in you causing more damage to yourself. | Chakra- 5(per post, per wound) | D-Rank | 6 points

[Ijutsu] Poison Isolation Technique [Gekiyaku Kakuzetsu no Jutsu]
This jutsu temporarily prevents the effects of poison by controlling and filtering blood as it moves through the patient's body. After the technique ends, then the poison affects the patient normally. | Chakra- 5 (Every Post) | D-Rank | 6 points

[Fuuton] Wind Needles [Kaze no Hari]
The ability to control wind and shoot it like needles. The wind is usually formed on top of the user's finger and shot at will. This jutsu cannot be caught by bare hands due to the fact it is made from sheer wind, nor can it be stopped in its tracks. It can be shot with dozens at the same time, and does not have to move in a straight line. The needles are easier to spot than most due to the vacuum of air that they create. | Chakra- 6 (Per Needle) | Damage- 4 (Per Needle) | D-Rank | 6 points



Houhai Tenraiken: Tobutori no Hane [Soaring Bird's Wing]
This is a technique where the user counter attacks, usually after throwing an opponent off balance and spins around to use a backfist weighted with electrically charged chakra (can be done in mid air). This can be used in conjunction with the Iron Staff, but its optional. | Chakra: 15 | Stamina: 10 | Damage: 30 if bare handed; 10 + weapon damage when armed | Must know Houhai Tenraiken: Ichiban |D-rank | 6 Points

Houhai Tenraiken: Ame no Tsume Tsuiraku [Divine Talons Crashing]
This is a technique where the practitioner uses the Tetsubo, or some other heavy weapon, by swinging it down and around at the opponent's Knees/Shins. The user then uses the momentum of that weighted object to suddenly flip in mid-air and send their heels weighted with electrically charged chakra hurdling toward either the fallen enemy or, if they dodged the weapon, toward their head and shoulder area.
| Chakra: 20 | Stamina: 15 | Damage: 40 + Weapon Damage (if the weapon hits) | Must know Houhai Tenraiken: Ichiban | D-rank | 6 Points

Houhai Tenraiken: Yatagarasu no Kashakunaki Kuchibashi [Great Raven's Merciless Beak]
The user of this technique utilizes the latent electrical energy surging through their body in order to do something similar to a chakra scalpel around just their fingertips. They then strike at vital points of an enemies' body, often using deflecting counter attacks in the process. The energy on the finger tips can only penetrate and cannot cut, making the injuries have less lasting effects than the real deal, but the wounds remain tramendously painful.
| Chakra: 5 per strike | Stamina: 5 per strike | 5 + Strength | Must know Houhai Tenraiken: Ichiban | D - Rank | 6 points

C-Rank

[Doton] Hidden Earth Instantaneous Body Skill [Iwagakure Shunshin no Jutsu]
An ability which allows the user to transport from one area to another by slowly lowering his body to the ground and eventually become "buried" in it. The user has to have been to the area before, and be able to sense the location with his own chakra before being able to transport him there. This means that the distance is limited to about one mile. | Once per post | Chakra- 20 | C-Rank | 12 points

[Ijutsu] Chakra Scalpel [Chakra no Mesu]
A technique that focuses chakra into the hands to form a blade of energy. It possibly was a skill used primarily for medical treatment (ie. surgery), but when combined with hand-to-hand skills, it becomes a dangerous weapon. The blade is capable of severing internal blood vessels and muscles during battle without breaking the skin. A fatal hit can be attained by attacking the heart or neck when used offensively. | Chakra- 30 | Damage- 30 | In addition to dealing hit point damage, you may restore or reduce any stat area except control by 1 for an additional 10 chakra| |Effect lasts for three posts. | C-Rank | 12 points

[Ijutsu] Healing Hand Skill [Chiyute no Jutsu]
A technique that concentrates chakra into the hand. The user then transmits the chakra into the patient through touch. The chakra seeks out and regenerates destroyed cells by enhancing the body's own natural healing process. | Chakra- 30 (Inc3) | Healed Damage- 30 (Inc3) | C-Rank | 12 points


[Ijutsu] Physical Stimulant Technique [Zuiikin Yobimizu no Jutsu]
The user touches the patient and sends a small amount of chakra into the brain. The chakra causes the release of endorphins and adrenalin, inducing a fight or flight response. This gives the patient a small power boost, but it also puts strain on the body of whoever it's used on. | Chakra- 15(Inc 5) | Damage- 10(Inc 5) | Increases any of the physical stats of the person it damages by 1(Inc 5) | Effect lasts 5 posts. | C-Rank | 12 points

[Raiton] Superconductor Skill [Dai Doutai no Jutsu]
An advanced form of the rudimentary academy skill vital to the use of Raiton techniques, Dia Doutai no Jutsu differs from its parent skill in that there is no passive quality. When activated, the user absorbs ambient electricity and sacrifices some of his own cells to generate more. Using the generated energy the user arcs it towards any fair-sized metallic objects within a certain range of the user to shock whomever is connected to it. Because this skill requires the body to provide a much higher resistance and much of the energy is made rather than absorbed, self-damage will occur and this jutsu functions normally regardless of the environment. | Chakra – 8 (inc2) | HP Cost – 2 (inc2) | Damage – 10 (inc2) | C-Rank | 12 points | This jutsu is unaffected by the weather; Requires [Raiton] Conductor Skill [Doutai no Jutsu]

Houhai Tenraiken [Surging Thunder Fist]: Niban
At this second stage in the style passed down through the generations, the practitioner stresses a bit more emphasis on infusing electrical energy throughout their bodies at low currents through thair nervous system and it starts to increase reaction time and even muscle strength. The feeling that they get is only a slight tingle at this point. As a result from the adaptive progression , the user can do more extensive combos than in the first stage. While diversion of force and counter attacking is still a main focus, the user can now string together movements more effectively, with or without the Tetsubo.
| Chakra: 10 per post active| Self Damage: 5 per post| Reflex: +4; Strength: +2 | C-rank | Must know the first stage; Does not count toward 1 jutsu per post rule | 12 Points

Houhai Tenraiken: Tobu Ikazuchitori no Hyakurai[Soaring Thunderbird's Hundred Thunderclaps]
Though a hundred thunderclaps is in the name this technique doesnt actually contain one hundred strikes. However, theorhetically it could if the practitioner used it that much. This technique involves the counter attack of any of the opponent's attacks where the user diverts their strike and counters with a quick, thunderous blow to any part of the abdomen/torso area. It can be done with the Tetsubo quite effectively by thrusting either end against the opponent.
| Stamina: 5 (Inc5)| Damage: 10 (Inc5) + Strength ; 2 (Inc5) + weapon damage (if weapon is used) | Must know Houhai Tenraiken: Niban | C-rank | 12 Points


B-Rank

Shadow Clone [Kage Bunshin no Jutsu]
This jutsu creates a real clone of the user. The clone has the exact same stats as the user and uses the same amount of chakra to perform justu as the user. Each clone will poof after one hit or at will. | Chakra- 15 (per clone) | |May create up to 5 clones| B-Rank | Kinjutsu | 18 points


A-Rank

Houhai Tenraiken: Kouryou no Toukai Tenrai (Sanban) [Surging Thunderfist: Rain Dragon's Hidden Thunder]
At this stage the user of Houhai Tenraiken turns their ability to internally manipulate electrcity into external manipulation. They trade in the increase in reflex and strength of the previous stage for a more damaging effect to the opponent. Growing up in the land of iron, Shioyaki was able to finely hone this in order to increase his range and the cutting ability of weapons and the crushing power in his hand to hand. This is done by manipulating electrical energy and creating a more dense electrical field to either surround body parts or a weapon.The base of the style is still retained therefore it still involves counter attack.
| Chakra: 100 initially; 15 per post| Stamina: 50 initially; 10 per post | Damage: physical attacks + 25; weapon attacks + 20; electrical energy objects = 10 | Must know the first stage; Does not count toward 1 jutsu per post rule | Must use second stage for at least 5 posts before use in a battle | Weapons effected must be in contact with user and must be made of metal | A-Rank | 25 Points


Stats:

HP: 970
Chakra: 960
Stamina: 1170

Strength: 10
Endurance: 15
Speed: 20
Reflex: 15
Control: 8
Accuracy: 8

Stored Jutsu Points: 3
Edited by Kienshin, Nov 18 2009, 07:27 PM.
 
Zeig
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Tsuchikage

Seeing as no one has cared to look at this, and Kien is bugging me. *Blind Stamps*
 
Watashi Wa Panda Desu
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Water Country: Head Advisor
Cant stamp it because of a few reasons, and I haven't even finished looking it over.
A. you gotta make a longer history, especially for a special jounin
B. You don t talk at all about his rising through the ranks to get to where he is now
C. As far as I know, we aren't doing sages right now

I'll have more up in a bit,. but I'm late for a doctors appointment.
 
Kienshin

A and B: Its kind of difficult to make longer without writing a book, which i've done numerous times and chose not to this time so people would be more apt to actually read it instead of just look at the length. And its also hard to describe him "rising through the ranks" when technically he's not a ninja, his father and grandfather were ninja that taught him. He's of special jounin strength, but its not an official rank.

C: the sage thing is a title in this case...if I wanted a "Sennin," which doesnt actually mean sage in the first place, then I would've signed up for a S-rank and not a special jounin. Fundamentally I made him a monk and usually monks were referred to as "sages" (The words for sage in the context of a monk in Japanese are: Roushi, Kenja, and Seijin. Sennin means: a mountain man or hermit.)

Therefore, I dont see calling him Thunder Mountain Sage of Iron as an issue as its a roleplaying device and not a rank.

EDIT: I added another long paragraph briefly describing how he got that nick name. but seriously, I can't really describe his strength in terms of rank in the history, all that can be said is that he's constantly trained and been trained ever since he was very young...not to mention this is a rehashing of a character that has been accepted in 2 previous incarnations of KG >.>
Edited by Kienshin, Nov 18 2009, 07:39 PM.
 
Karmage


With edits looks good to me.

Stamp
 
Nosumo
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Head Captain: Water Country
Seconded, stamp. (Not sure if I still have authority to stamp here but I will all the same.) :)
 
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